Angel From the Sea
by Hot4Gerry
Summary: Erik is given a gift from the sea that has the potential to give him everything he wants or destroy him permanently. Will love turn a phantom into a man? Will a phantom welcome an angel once again into his heart? Erik/OC
1. Chapter 1

**Summary: Erik is given a gift from the sea that has the potential to give him everything he wants or destroy him permanently. Will love turn a phantom into a man? Will a phantom welcome an angel once again into his heart? **

**Angel From the Sea**

**Chapter One**

**Mermaids and Phantoms **

The storm around the man was no more violent or potentially destructive than the storm churning within his mind and heart. Lightening ripped across the darkness splintering the continuity of the sky above just as the storm within the man tore through the sinew and muscle of an organ still but rendered useless as far as the broken man was concerned.

Stretching arms out to his sides as if inviting that destructive force from the heavens to come battle with him head-on perhaps hoping to end life's miserable continuation. He would willingly take on God's and nature's fierce powers that could strike and destroy with one shaft of crackling light if in the battle mercy could this one time be granted. He felt that fury or the storm to be no match for the fury within him, a fury brought on by loss, rejection and the ending of hopeless dreams.

He would pit his life against any power God could create. He had no fear of dying, his fear had to do with living, living alone for the rest of his days, lifing with memories that would not be cast out.

What good was a life that had nothing of living in it? What use was an existence that was only that, an existence? No longer did there seem to be a purpose for the music, his precious music, that at one time gave solace in solitude. Life had no substance, no meaning, no one who claimed any regard for him personally. Madame did not count for he thought her guilt kept her at his side, not concern for the lonely reclusive Phantom.

His music had been gone from his life the same length of time his beloved had been taken from him in reality but not from his mind or heart. Cursing that still beating organ again as he thumped his chest with his fists Erik railed against what God had condemned his life to be.

Standing on the cliff overlooking the small strip of beach his eyes contemplated the churning waves crashing against the rocks below. He challenged the heavy gusts of wind to topple him over the edge relieving him of a life born in solitude and misery.

One name filled the night with a painful sorrow. He sobbed out that dreaded and cherished name. The wind carried his sobs of want out over the storm tossed waves. He dropped to the ground pounding with his clenched fists into the rocky outcropping beneath him.

"Christine. My beloved why? Why could you not love me as I needed to be loved? Why did God send you into my life only to force you out when I needed you the most? Oh my love, hear me now. If any mercy is within your heart find me now. I cannot bear this life any longer. It must end soon or I will go truly mad. Please come my love, my heart. Save your Angel of Music, save this loathsome creature, your Angel in Hell."

Erik tossed his pleadings toward the thunderous crash of lightening and towering waves that beat against the rocks wearing the substance of the shore away so slowly it would not be noticed until years of this constant bashing had done its work, unlike the beating his heart had taken at the hands of his beloved which showed immediate destruction within and without the hunched form shrouded with black billowing cape.

The wearing away of his power and will to live had not stood against the cruel beating his heart had taken. The force that had wore away at him with constant annihilation had been a delicate sweet angel. He could withstand man's punishments, humanity's rejection of him. What had brought him to this present weak state had been a soft spoken, warm angel of song.

She had wrapped her tendrils around his heart enmeshing him in bindings that he could not fight nor break. She had woven her spell about him just as he thought he wove his about her.

Christine had sliced through those tightly wound bonds with swift cutting precision. Unlike him she had been able to remove those chains from her. Her boy had given her the strength to fight against her angel, to resist his seductive web that had been set to trap her in the monsters dark world.

The key to the chains he had wrapped around her had been unlocked in the end by two sweet kisses from her lips to his. With those offerings she had given him something he had never had before, the warm touch of another human being.

Christine had rendered him unable to do anything other than stand there shaking and sobbing while she kissed him then looked at his horrid face bared before her eyes by her own hand. Ub that moment for an instant love reflected back at him or so delusion persuaded a mind made mad by years of wanting and not having what other men so freely receive, love.

In the end it had been pity clearly reflecting back at him. Behind the shimmer of tears he had thought he saw a glimmer of some deeper emotion but too many years of self doubt gave him a truth he did not want to acknowledge. Before he could lose himself in her sweetness again Erik had sent her and her Vicomte away from his grasping hands. If she had not gone Erik would have killed that boy without any remorse. It had been best to send her away while she still had some kind regards toward him.

Even though she had taken from him that one possession that would surely drive him to the brink of insanity, his pride, he loved her still. Mask and man were one and the same. Take away one the other will perish. That cut Erik felt to be the deepest, her willingness to expose him in such a hurtful way had nearly left him powerless to move. She knew what that thin shield between him and the world meant. Her love for her young Vicomte had won out over her pity for her poor disfigured Angel in Hell.

Christine knew not what hell really was and neither had Erik. Now he began to see just how deep hell's fiery ache could lived, breathed and smelled the brimstone daily. Why he did not become engulfed in the flame thus ending his earthly damnation he could only guess that his hated enemy, God, had further agonies to place before him.

Growing chilled from the rain beating down Erik shivered. Perhaps if he stayed out long enough an illness so wretched would befall him that he would not survive. He sneered when he imagined what Antoinette would make of that. She who had betrayed his trust now served him once again as his housekeeper. Erik thought if he let her stay he might exact some revenge for her treachery one day when he could bring himself to care for such things.

Just now he cared not for seeking revenge or continuing with any sort of life. He had always teetered on the edge of severe depression. He had been able to keep the shroud of dark desires from taking over completely. Only when he pursued Christine had he let his better judgment waiver. He and many others had paid the price.

Hanging his head in despair Erik let his eyes once again return to those churning waters that seemed at times to beckon with open arms as he heard a soft voice encouraging him to take that small step into nothingness. This would be a quick end to his life then freedom from all this damn earthly pain. He snorted as the idea came to him that God in his cruelty would have him survive perhaps without the use of his limbs or nimble mind. That would be the ultimate insult to one such as Erik.

Erik came away from his dark thoughts as he noticed the waves pushing something toward shore. It seemed to be a mass of white material. He guessed some unlucky sailor had lost a piece of his mast. The white material he could see was draped across what appeared to be a long piece of wood. The suns first rays were just beginning to peep through the parting clouds as the once furious storm quieted.

His curiosity peaked to have something other than his dark thoughts to occupy a few minutes of his time. Glancing down curiosity led to a somewhat safe path being plotted out mentally. Climbing became second nature from the day Antoinette had brought a young boy to the opera house after freeing him from his cage.

Lying down on his stomach Erik scooted backward until he felt the edge of the cliff. Letting a dangling foot search out purchase with the toe of his boot Erik found the rock that jutted out about two feet from the face of the cliff. Adrenaline raced into Erik's bloodstream making him feel more alive than he had in nearly a year.

Erik could not help but think that perhaps dangerous pursuits would give him back some semblance of living. Challenging death could be such a rush to the system. Many times the dark one had been challenged with Erik coming out the victor.

Slowly making his way downward, taking small steps as he found one foothold after another, every successful inch brought another surge of wreckless adrenline to heat veins thought filled with ice. Looking down only about ten feet of sand remained of the shore. In another half hour it would be swallowed by the tide.

Jumping down onto his feet he landed on the toes of his boots and hands. Rising to his feet Erik approached the object he sought. If it only proved to be the mast he thought it, well at least he had a bit of excitement to end this long dreary day.

Standing over what he thought had only been a large piece of sail he found himself somewhat shocked to see short dark hair atop what appeared to be a young boy. Taking note of the voluminous dress-like garment, his mind argued perhaps not a male.

Bending down to his haunches Erik reached out to turn over the still as death body. The front view of the prone figure proved without doubt to be female. Her womanly form was outlined through the transparent garment. It looked as if there was some sort of binding across her chest. Odd but not unheard of in certain countries or sects even here in England.

The features were delicate although now covered in purpling bruises at the temple. Around her neck there hung a chain at the end of which rested a crucifix. Her appearance suggested her to be a part of some religious order. Perhaps a novice waiting to become a nun? Erik could not help the grimace of distaste that pulled at his mouth. He had his fill of those wretched, ruler swinging harridan's of God's work when he was a young boy still in his mother's home.

His mother had thought religion would drive out whatever evil had marked his face. Erik could have told her the only evil that had marked him had been the hand of God. As a child he had been an innocent. Only later after years of abuse and rejection had he become the monstrous demon everyone thought possessed him.

Hands on hips with brow wrinkled in comtemplation his mind wrestled with the best option. Preferrence being to leave her to fate warred with reason. All he would need was for someone to come along and find her days later dead on his small outcrop of beach. Luck being a stranger no doubt the body would snag on a rock only to land on shore for some trespasser to find then report to the authorities.

Antoinette would point her mental finger at him. Soon the villagers would follow. They thought him some sort of hell spawn as it was. Only the priest's intervention and sermon on generosity to the less fortunate had stayed their gathering around his home with torches and pitchforks in those first few months of occupation.

At the time Erik could not resist laughing at the irony of the priest stepping up on his behalf. He had nearly killed himself choking on the laughter when Antoinette had told him what had taken place during her early morning mass.

Erik wondered what spell had held the building erect when leniency and prayer had been requested on his behalf. He and God had a hate/hate relationship.

Knowing there was no other solution Erik placed his hands under her fragile knees and shoulders. She weighed practically nothing. Incongruously he took note that she only had one ugly black boot on her foot. Thick white leggings were covering her legs. Holes dotted them all the way from thigh to what he could see above the boot on one foot and he could see her toe sticking out of the other legging.

To preserve her modesty Erik did the best he could to draw the cloth together to hide as much as he could. Something had torn a large piece of the dress's skirt away leaving only a remnant.

Resentment in every angry step measured his steps in wide strides toward the cave hidden behind a large pile of rocks. The cave he had discovered within only a few weeks of living on this stormy English coast. A mediocre pile of rocks grew much larger as he had discovered the cave led to the cellar of his home. It wound its way for a mile or so before coming to a large heavy door.

This must have been used to either smuggle contraband or people in and out of England, perhaps both. Wanting to keep the knowledge of the cave to himself necessitated many trips with wheelbarrows filled with rocks. Since the former owners of his estate had died leaving no heirs, Erik felt he need not be overly concerned about anyone knowing about the cave as the former owner had been as reclusive as he was and equally as unwelcoming to have trespassers in his domain. Still, life had proven not to be on the side of a formerly powerful ghost and phantom.

The former owner had been said to shoot the unfortunate person who accidentally crossed the boundary lines of his property. He also had a pair of vicious wolfhounds that he set upon the unwary. Erik had inherited those devil's disciples when he purchased the estate. He could not get them to leave or make peace with them. They came and went as they pleased. If the door opened they came in. When they needed to go out to pay heed to nature's call someone let them out. No one dare touch them as growls of warning emitted from deep within their chests whenever anyone got too close for their comfort.

Those two bitches were the foulest tempered animals Erik had ever come across. What had been done to them to make them these bad tempered beasts he imagined could be likened to what had driven him to become a reclusive ghost and phantom. He too had shunned any human touch, all but Christine's. He had nearly died for want of her touch. He had committed murder and many other heinous crimes to win her devotion and promote her career.

Mentally calling a halt to this line of thought Erik carried his burden along the path lit with torches here and there. Erik liked to keep the torches burning when he could as it discouraged bats from roosting on the caves walls and ceilings. He hated bats almost as much as he hated rats. Both were vermin the world could well do without.

Laying his burden down Erik wrestled with the stiff door. The weight of it strained even Erik's considerable muscles. It had to be at least four inches thick. He kept the hinges oiled so the swinging of the door would be nearly silent while the oil also helped to move the door a bit easier. Reclaiming his burden Erik eyed the ladder going up into the ceiling of his cellar with an evil look. Damnation, could nothing be simple?

Hoisting the still unconscious woman over his shoulder he then began the climb upward. The trapdoor at the top would lead into a storage room just off the kitchen. Erik had made sure to cover the door by building a cabinet over the opening. Nosey housekeepers were the very devil when trying to escape unseen into the night.

It looked like an ordinary cabinet and indeed was used as such. The only difference from any other cabinet was that there was a three foot space behind the back side of the cabinet. Once in the space behind the cabinet it was a simple matter of tripping the lever so the whole wall swung outward.

Erik used his peephole to make sure no one was about before he sprang the lever. It would not do for anyone to discover his secret. Erik was a master of keeping secrets, his own at least.

Not wanting to take her to the upper floors Erik strode to one of the servant's rooms. He did not care whose privacy he invaded. He'd not have anyone invading his sanctuary. Not even Antoinette had a room upstairs. He had placed her in a small cottage at the end of the garden.

He had not forgiven her entirely for the part she had played in his humiliation, but he also knew he shared in the blame for all that happened. Antoinette had been a loyal friend who did service for him without asking for recompense. He had paid her for her services but not once had she ever asked for anything from him other than he leave her daughter alone, then later she had begged him to release Christine from her childish belief in him as her Angel of Music.

Erik of course had by then fallen completely in love with Christine. He had first given her his music, then his heart and soul. She had wanted none of him. She had taken his music then trod upon his heart leaving him wounded to his very core.

Having seen no one lurking about Erik left the cabinet to carry his burden to the room at the end of the hall. Opening the door then stepping inside to cross to the small cot in the corner hurredly the catch of the day dropped unceremoniously down onto not only a small cot but a rickety on as well. There was not even a bed in the room only the very uncomfortable looking cot.

Feeling an uncomfortable emotion wash over him that felt suspiciously like shame, Erik made a mental note to see that the servants had proper beds. A servant who lacked sleep would no doubt sooner of later make disagreeable mistakes or heaven forbid, demands to speak to him personally. Erik could not tolerate anything less than perfection, be it in his possessions or the service he received from those under his rule.

Erik picked up the pale thin wrist to check her pulse. She had a strong beat for one who looked so breakable and one coming through a horrendous experience of some sort.

Sighing as he looked down at his sea nymph Erik turned to go find Antoinette so he could hand over responsibility of his charge to her.

If he thought he could remove the woman from his residence sight unseen he would take her to the church in town and drop her at their door. They'd know what to do with her seeing as how she was one of them.

This task Erik did not look forward to at all. Antoinette like as not would think he had something to do with the woman's condition. Every woman Erik even looked at briefly garnered him Antoinette's suspicions.

Perhaps she thought Erik sought a replacement for Christine. If she had bothered to ask Erik could have given her his solemn vow that he would not dip his heart into that cauldron of brewing torment and unfulfilled dreams ever again.

**A/N: This being one of my earlier works the quality is medicre at best. Be gentle in your critism please**.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

**Awakening Waif**

Erik found Antoinette in his sitting room knitting. Often words were grumbled halfheartedly that Antoinette had a cozy home for her exclusive use yet still invaded his privacy after hours. Antoinette merely gave him one of her looks that would convey that the person receiving the look had very little intelligence. Antoinette often used his downstairs sitting room for her many leisurely pursuits.

As of late she had been knitting some pieces of infant's clothing. Meg would soon be presenting her with her first grandchild. Erik would never let on that he felt a bit of Antoinette's anticipation. Even if he never laid eyes on the child provisions were already in place to secure the child's future.

Putting down her needles in her lap Antoinette addressed Erik searching for a hint of his mood. "I am glad you came back before it got any worse out there. Why you continue to haunt the night like some ghost is beyond me. I thought you had given up all that nonsense," she chided him daringly. Only this woman dared use such words and tone with him.

"Erik you have walked on my clean floors with your muddy boots. You will be the one cleaning up the mess you left behind. You're dripping on the rug and I imagine the hardwood floor has a trail of wet boot prints," she scolded pricking his rebellious nature into play.

"Shall I remind you just who pays your salary? I'll not be moping any mess, my own or anyone else's," he glared daring her to refute his declaration.

They glared at one another for a few silent seconds. They both knew Erik would win the argument but that never stopped Antoinette from testing him from time to time.

"The reason I came looking for you Antoinette is I have a woman lying unconscious in the room just down the hall from the kitchen. Before you accuse me I will tell you her condition has nothing to do with me. Remind me to order proper beds for all the servant's quarters, might as well order bedding while you are at it. I shall leave the woman and the domestic chores in your capable hands."

Erik did not really think he would be getting out of that room without a comment from her. He had turned and taken only a step or two when he heard her exclamations and command for him to stop right there and not a step further.

"Erik you can't make a statement like that then leave without telling me more. Who is this woman? Where did you find her? Has she been injured or merely fainted?"

Arms folded across a wide chest, feet planted apart in a relaxed stance that hid any betraying nervousness forced a confident smile. Her rapid questioning irritated him. Why ask a question if you did not plan on waiting for an answer?

"I have no idea who she is. I thought at first she was a youth. Her hair is cut short and she wears the garbs of a novitiate. I am certain she is not from this Parish. I would have heard of someone who looks as she does. There is bruising on her face but nothing outwardly apparent other than that as far as I could see. I did not know I would be expected to categorize her injuries. If I had I would have taken greater care to have a closer look. Next time perhaps," he tossed out knowing full well no such thing would happen.

Again Erik turned away. This time she did not call him back. He made a hasty retreat to his sanctuary above.

Antoinette watched Erik's back until he had turned the corner heading for the stairs. Every time he left during one of these storms she worried he would not come back.

Half the village spoke of hearing an unearthly wailing during those fierce storms. Rumors were being spread about a ghost who lost his love to the sea. Antoinette knew it was not a ghost filling the night with those mournful sounds. It was poor tormented Erik.

This past year had done little to ease the pain in his heart. He simply could not let Christine go. He suffered so with his memories and regrets. She had thought his agony would lesson with time but Christine had been Erik's first and only love.

His life of solitude had not given him an opportunity to seek out the companionship of women or men for that matter. Erik had no one he called friend. She was his only buffer between the outside world and himself.

As often as she tried to bring him and his music into the light she had failed him miserably. She had also failed Christine.

When Christine turned perhaps fifteen Erik had begun to see her as a lovely young woman and not the same sweet gangly little girl he had been teaching to use her voice so she might one day command the stage of his opera house.

Antoinette had seen the disaster coming but could do little to stop it. Erik had clearly lost all reason by Christine's seventeenth year. That was when Raoul de Chagny reentered Christine's life. They fell in love after reliving those days of innocent childhood crushes.

Erik had gambled everything and lost it all. Antoinette had hoped to prevent anyone from losing their life but had only ended up sending Raoul nearly to his death in one of Erik's water traps then again at Erik's own hands.

Meg fortunately had disobeyed her mother's commands which Antoinette would have reprimanded her for if not for the fact that Meg had found Erik in one of his tunnels feverish and out of his mind with the realization of what he had done.

In desperate need of a companion Erik had gone to unbelievable lengths to win Christine. He had willingly sold a piece of his soul to darkness.

Meg had found her and told Antoinette Erik's condition and where to find him. Between the two of them they had half dragged half carried Erik to their tiny apartment they kept as a place to have time to themselves away from the opera house as well as celebrate holidays and special family occasions.

It had taken Erik two weeks to regain his health and another two weeks to find some thread of sanity. Antoinette was not sure as of today how much of that darkness was still within Erik.

He had never been stable during the best of times. His temper would frighten even a brave man let alone a woman such as herself.

Once he had been fit for travel, Antoinette had booked tickets for England. Erik had protested he could not leave his angel behind. Under threat of arrest from the gendarmes Erik had reluctantly left the shores of France swearing he would return for his angel one day.

Antoinette feared for Raoul if ever Erik carried out his promise. He and Christine were very happy and expecting their first child.

Her own daughter Meg was with child as well. Meg was due in a month and Christine was due shortly thereafter. Antoinette planned to be at Christine's side as she was just as much Antoinette's daughter as Meg was.

Meg had met an Englishman who contributed to the opera house in London. During a meet and greet session Trevor and Meg had met and fell madly in love. They were now in Italy visiting one of Trevor's wineries.

In typical Erik fashion, this new problem had been landed in her lap. She had been dealing with Erik's plots, plans and tantrums since she had rescued him from his fate with the gypsies.

Setting aside her knitting she looked longingly at the white and cream yarn. She had hoped to have this finished so she could begin another. Her world would soon be blessed with two children.

Erik knew about Meg's expectancy but Antoinette had worked diligently to keep the news of Christine's impending motherhood from him. Who knew how he would react. Any news that trickled through to Erik concerning Christine and her marriage sent him into a rage that soon turned into a deep depression.

Not quite knowing what Erik had dragged back home with him Antoinette gasped when she saw the pale figure of a young woman lying on the cot. He had told her what to expect but the reality was far worse.

Clearly she was wet to the bone. What clothing remained on her body did little to warm or cover her. Underneath the white thick garment that Antoinette supposed was the dress of a novice, only a stiff white cotton shift, torn almost from her body, could she find upon grappling with the unconscious woman to remove her clothing. The binding beneath her shift Antoinette guessed had something to do with her religious ties.

Antoinette could have called for help but since they had no idea who this woman was or where she came from silence seemed best for now. Erik did not need any more gossip or speculation passed around the villagers concerning who he was or where he came from.

Turning the woman onto her side Antoinette removed the pin that held the bindings together. Antoinette gasped when she saw the thin white crisscrossing lines that had obviously been made by a whip.

Who would do such a thing to a young woman? It angered her just imagining what this woman had suffered at the hands of some sadist just as Erik had in his younger days with the Gypsies. Standing up straight Antoinette looked down on her charge. Poor dear thing. What horrible fate had she suffered? Those wounds were old and well healed.

Tossing the bandages aside she made a mental list of things she would need and in what order things should be done. Hot water, towels, washcloth, soap. The list went on and on as Antoinette went to the bath located in the hall across from the kitchen. The servants all shared this tiny bath.

Antoinette managed to find the things she needed. She had to make two trips as the basin of hot water needed to be carried with both hands.

Placing the basin on the side table Antoinette set aside the blanket so she could wash the young woman with warm soap and water.

Antoinette sucked in her breath as she discovered many old poorly healed scars. Her back was crisscrossed with white lines she had seen before. Those would be from a whip. Antoinette had seen those same types of marks on Erik's back. There were also what looked like burns made by perhaps a poker.

Washing the delicate features of the woman's face Antoinette wondered what the poor woman could have done to earn such punishment.

The scars around her wrists and ankles told another piece of her story. At one time she had been held captive by someone. The bindings had either been too tight or on for a long period of time. These wounds looked fresh.

Antoinette had laid a towel across the woman's middle to preserve a little of her dignity. As Antoinette washed her mumblings emitted from the mouth of the unconscious woman.

Erik's mermaid spoke in several different languages only French and English words were understood by Antoinette. If she was not well educated formally the many languages spoken indicated the woman at least had knowledge.

When her patient began to thrash about crying out Antoinette soothed her as best she could. It was clear the woman fought off some attacker.

Blushing to the roots of her hair Antoinette inspected the woman to see if she had been sexually assaulted. Blessedly she could find no evidence of that heinous act. There was bruising on her upper arms made from a hand gripping the arm tightly. The size of the prints indicated a man had held her tightly. Her face had multiple bruises as well. Those could be from either her time in the water, an attack from someone or both.

Satisfied the woman suffered no real harm other than whatever caused her to remain unconscious, Antoinette got a clean shift from Lizzy's dresser. The scullery maid would not mind as her heart was as big as her ever chattering mouth.

Pulling the covers up to the woman's chest Antoinette went in search of Erik. Whether he wanted to know of the status of the woman she would inform him all the same. If she was to stay under his roof he needed to be kept apprised of her recovery. Besides which, Erik had saved her life so in some cosmic way that made him responsible for her. He of course would not see it that way.

Since Christine's betrayal Erik had become even less forgiving of trespasses against him or tolerant of those around him. He had never been one to seek out company but now he seemed to carry an even deeper hatred for humanity, rich, noble men and women in particular. His little mermaid did not seem to come into that category. If her garb meant anything she was studying to enter the life of serving her faith.

Erik held an even bitterer feud with anyone who represented any sort of belief in God or mercy. Throughout his life little mercy or kindness by anyone other than Antoinette and in some small offhand way by Christine. It had left him unable to show those emotions or indeed have any wish to extend them to others.

His association with Christine had been the closest he had ever been to showing any sort of tenderness toward another human being.

Even with her he had been demanding of her allegiance, shouting in anger or berating her for some small transgression. Her reunion with Raoul and subsequent romance had led Erik further into his darker side.

Antoinette could not find Erik in any of the rooms on the lower floor. She pursed her lips in frustration and just a little anger. Erik no doubt had scampered up to his warren. Either that or he slipped along inside the walls keeping watch in secret over his household.

She had no doubt that Erik had two way mirrors as well as panels that opened up into every room. He liked to know all that went on in his little piece of the world. Besides, Erik always knew far too much of what went on in private conversations not to have been present in some way.

Giving up on finding Erik downstairs Antoinette made her way back to her charge. She almost discarded Erik's standing order that no one entered into his private domain without express permission from him.

Antoinette wondered how this new person would affect Erik if he even took notice of the woman's presence. As Antoinette looked down upon her charge the woman's eyes began to flutter.

With a low moan her eyes came open allowing Antoinette to see into their confused blue depths for the first time. She had the most beautiful blue eyes Antoinette had ever seen, such a dark blue as to seem almost purple in color.

"Hello there. Welcome back. You gave us quite a turn these past few hours. There are so many questions needing answers but first I wish to know your name. I am Antoinette Giry. You may call me Antoinette. I think we need not stand on ceremony given the circumstances. The man who owns this estate is Erik Lefèvre. Perhaps you will meet him later."

Antoinette doubted Erik would willingly come to meet the woman face to face. More than likely he would spy on her to learn whatever he wanted to know, thus eliminating the need for face to face contact. For Erik that would not hold any appeal whatsoever. Glancing at the mirror Antoinette would not doubt that Erik might even now be listening and observing his unwanted guest from his hiding place within the wall.

It appeared the woman struggled to find words as her lips quivered. Her eyes darted around the room. At last she spoke in a voice barely above a whisper.

"I…I do not know who I am. I…I cannot remember. Am I…am I not from here?"

"Ah mon petite you are English. I wondered as you spoke in several different languages while unconscious. You were found on the beach clinging to the broken tip of a mast. Can you remember being on any seafaring vessel?"

"No. I cannot remember anything about me. Why cannot I remember? What will happen to me?" Fear clearly shown out of those entrancing eyes. Confusion could also be seen as well as heard in her voice.

Antoinette tried to soothe her as panic began to agitate the woman. It must be a horrible feeling not to know anything about oneself.

"Try to relax. You are welcome to stay here for as long as you like. We have plenty of room so you will be no inconvenience at all."

A growl from behind the mirror alerted Antoinette to Erik's presence. If her supposition needed verification that noise proved how well she knew her charge.

He would not like her offer to the woman to stay with them. Antoinette threw a challenging look toward the mirror. She set her face into the look that had cowed many a performer over the years as dance instructor of the opera house.

"Well we cannot continue to think of you as our mermaid from the sea so we shall have to choose a name. Do you have a name you would prefer or do you even recall any names at all?"

"I can remember things that are not connected with me personally. The only knowledge that seems to elude me is anything that would remind me of who I am and what brought me to this situation. I…know nothing of what I like or prefer. It does not matter. You may choose something you feel appropriate," spoken despondently with chin dipped to chest in defeat.

Antoinette felt sorry for this poor waif from the sea. Not knowing anything about oneself had to be daunting as well as frightening. To awake in a strange place totally dependent on people you did not know or did not know you could unnerve even the bravest of men let alone some young sea waif.

"I think you may have come from some religious order as you wore the garb of a novitiate when Erik found you. I think we shall call you Mary. Not very original but simple and easily remembered. Now, having settled the issue of your name would you care for something to eat or drink? I would imagine you are quite hungry and thirsty after such an ordeal."

"I…think I might need to use the facilities first." Mary blushed to the roots of her hair to speak out loud of something so personal.

"Oh pardon me my dear. How thoughtless of me. Of course you may have use of anything you need. The servants use the bath in the hallway. Do you think you could go a few feet with a little help?"

Mary. That did not sound familiar. Then why should it? The name had been given to her by a stranger. Panic barely kept in check began to work its way to the forefront of her mind.

The most pressing thing seemed to be the need for a water closet. Mary sat up swinging her legs to the side. She swayed dizzily. The woman who had introduced herself as Antoinette Giry quickly gave Mary a steadying hand.

On unsteady legs Mary walked to the room Antoinette said was the facilities used by the servants. It confounded Mary how she could remember how to function in everyday things while not remembering something as personal as her name or where she came from.

Finishing her task Mary washed her hands catching sight of the woman reflected back to her. Nothing in that face seemed familiar. It was as if she looked at a stranger. Someone she saw for the first time and what a horrific sight it was.

She touched an inquisitive hand to her short cropped hair. Running a hand down over her face she lightly fingered the bruising at her temple and along her cheeks. The bruises on the right side were in the shape of fingerprints. Someone had hit her not too long ago.

Tilting her head to the side Mary took in her features. She supposed she would be considered pretty by some. Her skin was clear of blemishes other than freckles across her nose and cheeks.

Her eyes were dark blue. Her black hair lay close to her scalp even shorter than what men wore their hair. Why would she do that? A woman's hair was considered to be her crowning glory.

Running her hands down over her body Mary found herself to be tall or at least she thought she might be tall. The top of her head almost reached to top of the mirror.

Pulling the shift close around her Mary noted her small waist. Her bosoms were not overly large, at least she didn't think so.

Would anyone be looking for her? Did she have family who would worry over her absence? Antoinette had said she may be connected to the church. Mary felt no overwhelming need for prayer. Was she religious? If she was considering entering the church as a nun should she not feel some affinity with God or some need to ask for his mercy?

Mary felt that she had always been more dependent on herself to solve any of life's problems. How she could know that and not know anything of any real use to her puzzled her.

Perhaps once she had recovered from her ordeal things would come back to her. She could do nothing at the moment. She had nothing of her own. For now she would need to depend on the kindness of strangers.

She felt that this was not something she would normally tolerate. Independence she felt had been of paramount importance to her. Independence and joining the church seemed a contradiction. When one entered into that life you gave up everything including your name to serve your God. All this knowledge baffled Mary once again as she did not know how her mind could pick and choose what it remembered.

When she opened the door Antoinette was there to help her back to the room she had been taken to. The cramped space and cot did not seem to be anything Mary was not accustomed to. If she lived in the church that would stand to reason her quarters would be sparse.

Antoinette left her with instructions to try to rest as much as she could. Someone would pop in and out throughout the day. She could either join the servants in the kitchen or have a tray in her room if she still felt too weak later.

Mary tried to sleep but found little at the moment that would be cause for the easing of her mind. Finally she drifted into sleep where dreams left her in terror when she awoke drenched in sweat with her chest heaving as she gasped for breath.

All she could recall was a dark shadowy figure standing over her then a blow to the side of her head. In the dream it had been storming. She must have been on a boat of some kind for she could still feel the swaying beneath her feet.

Along with the rain and lightening masses of water had come over the side to flood the deck. A flash skittered across her mind of her struggling to regain her feet as that dark menacing figure came toward her. Just when lightning flashed, which would have revealed a face to her, Mary's mind shut out the memory leaving a blank hole she could not fill with any more images.

She would do as Antoinette advised, rest as much as possible while letting her mind heal so when it was ready it would reveal all to her. At least she hoped to have her memory returned. Who would wish to have every memory erased forever?

A man cloaked in darkness wandering the rooms above with his own memories chasing him relentlessly could have told her he would do almost anything to have every memory eradicated from his mind. Nothing of his past held any appeal for him. He would change circumstances with her in a second if the offer would have been made or if it were even possible.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Oh crimony. I thought this was a K or K+ story but I was wrong. Nothing too bad but not for young eyes either so to be safe I changed the rating. I do ask your forgiveness for my error. Looking back I now would write this chapter differently but what's done is done. **

**Chapter Three**

**Meeting the Master**

Mary awoke to hear someone timidly knocking on the door. Not having a window or clock anywhere that she could see, time of day became ilrelevant. Antoinette had said someone would come to inquire if she would join them in the kitchen or have a tray in bed. The roiling of her stomach mixed with a head ready to fall off given the least provocation did not deem it advisable to eat anything solid. What if anything the reply had been to her refusal for a meal got lost as sleep felt a more welcome choice. The grumbling of her stomach reminded her just how long it had been since feeding the growling animal taking up residence beneath her skin. It must be morning. Feeling much stronger this morning Mary thought she might like to get up and meet the rest of the household staff.

The only thing preventing that was her lack of clothing. Getting out of bed Mary jerked her feet back up off the floor. It felt like a block of ice beneath her feet. Hopping rather quickly toward the door Mary opened it a crack so she could peer around the door. When she only saw a young smiling face she opened the door in invitation.

"Morning Miss. My name is Elizabeth but all my friends call me Lizzy. Gracious I suppose even my enemies call me Lizzy, not that I have any I know of. I suppose you'd like to dress for the day. Mrs. Giry, we used to call her Madame as she's French, well she'd have none of that as she is now in England. A real nice woman she is too. Let's us call her Antoinette all personal like. Very easy to work for. Not like that handsome devil what owns the place. A right tyrant he is. Stalking about all gloom and doom. Shouts the most horrendous curses I ever did hear. A splendid pub prowler he'd make what with his bad attitude and foul filth spewing forth," she stopped to inhale having forgotten to finsih her train of thought concerning

"So will you be coming to the kitchen for breakfast or should I bring a tray? Oh and here's the dress Antoinette sent. It should fit. It's only a maids uniform but it's all we have at the moment," at last Lizzy came to the purpose of her visit.

Mary's head felt as if it were spinning from some fast circling merry-go-round. Friendly she may be but Lizzy made Mary's head swim with her chatter. Finding her own manners Mary thanked Lizzy saying she would be joining them in the kitchen as she would like to meet everyone.

Having given Mary directions to the kitchen Lizzy left her to dress. Lifting the hem of her shift prior to pulling it over her head she paused when a noise from within the wall drew her attention. Rats. Mary hated rats. She should perhaps mention this to someone.

Erik had been making his morning visit to his guest when Lizzy had arrived. He had taken notice that the woman, Mary, had drawn her feet back from the bare floor. He would add rugs to the order for bedding and a bed.

Lizzy's comments had amused him at the same time he found them offensive even if they were true. He'd have a word with Antoinette. Well perhaps not as she would point out that nothing but the truth had been spoken and if he did not wish to hear ill words spoken of him he should not eavesdrop on other's conversations or spy from behind walls and mirrors.

When Mary had lifted up her shift giving him a bird's eye view of her charms underneath the shift she wore, he had nearly fell over backwards. As it was he fell into the wall scrambling to regain his upright position. If the space had been any wider he would have fallen to his backside for sure. The wall saved him that indignity. Once he regained his footing he had hot footed it down the passage to the set of stairs he had built to the floor above.

Erik did not try very hard to erase the image his mind kept flashing for his perusal. He was not a voyeur of women. He had never spied on the women of the opera house when they were dressing or undressing. He was a gentleman in that sense. Seeing that woman was not something he deliberately sought. An accidental persual that is all it was, nothing more.

Rather than go to his bedroom Erik hurried to his music room. He began to pound out random notes using his music to take his mind away from the images of that woman's alluring flesh he had caught that brief glimpse of from his hiding place.

The woman should be shucked out into the cold for giving this brief look at what he would never have. Christine's image had driven him nearly mad and he had never seen as much of her.

He had cursed himself in arousal hell by touching Christine's flesh with his hands during the performance of Don Juan Triumphant thereby forever having her in his memory with no hope for anything beyond those caresses to tease and taunt him.

Now he had seen a womanly form without the draping of clothing hiding anything from his eyes. It had only been brief but with Erik's ability to memorize everything he heard or saw he would have this woman's image to replay torturously in his dreams.

Damn his penchant for spying. He had decided to leave the woman entirely in Antoinette's hands. Why had he not stuck to that decision? He would have saved himself some grief if he had.

Without even realizing it Erik's fingers had begun to play a sensual melody. Stopping momentarily Erik cocked his head to replay the notes in his mind then let his fingers pick out the notes once more. He made a few adjustments. Pleased with his creation Erik pulled a piece of paper to him along with his pen. He much preferred his old quill but Antoinette said a gentleman of his wealth and means could afford a fountain pen.

He nearly always spilled the damn ink when he refilled the thing. He made messes with the dripping of his quill but nothing compared to the spilling of a whole bottle of ink.

Music occupying his mind kept Erik from returning to things he'd rather forget. Once again music came to aid him so he might find relief from pondering on things the world denied him.

The passionate notes came quickly. Erik would play then write down the notes sounding at first softly then more loudly if ignored. Learning not to ignore that noise inside his mind saved his sanity many times or what could be salvaged from a mind so twisted by years of torment. When he felt the composition satisfactory for now he rested his fingers on top of the keys.

His damn mind brought back those images he had wished to banish from his thoughts. As image after image replayed in memory, Erik's body responded to the stimulus.

Unconsciously Erik's hand wandered down to the hardening in his trousers. Stroking himself through the fabric Erik growled in frustration. He would get no peace until he had released the demon seed from that demanding beast between his legs. Why were men ruled by such an inconcruous appendage?

Unbuttoning his trousers hastily now that he had given in, Erik nearly tore his trousers as he hurriedly took his engorged flesh in his hand. Manipulating himself in a familiar way Erik leaned his head back giving his mind permission to relive any sensual image it wished.

His strokes became faster as he neared his climax. Breathing harshly he searched his pocket for his handkerchief. Dragging it from his pocket Erik barely had time to place it strategically over the tip of his manhood before he released himself with a groan into the linen.

It irritated Erik that his body demanded he do this damnable act every now and then. What he wouldn't give to have a woman lie beneath him and spread her legs in welcome. He knew it would never happen of course, not with his face.

He had considered the option of a whore from one of the brothels but he thought that would make him feel less of a man than he already did if he could only have that pleasure by purchase only.

Often he had dreamed of Christine performing that act and many others. For a time he had led himself to believe she would actually choose him over that pompous boy. He had deluded himself and she had shown that to him in the cruelest way possible.

Knowing Antoinette would come to him since he had no intention of going down to her, Erik cleaned himself, disposed of the soiled linen in the fire, then buttoned his trousers once more.

He would play his new composition until she came. Fine tuning of a piece always kept Erik occupied for longer than it took him to compose an original piece. He was a perfectionist in his music as well as his person.

This was the first piece Erik even considered real music. All the rest had only been a means to expel those dangerous emotions that led him into dark places in his mind.

Only a half hour later Erik heard the little buzzer he had installed for Antoinette's exclusive use to alert him that she wished to speak with him.

When he opened the door Erik had been going to reprimand Antoinette for making him wait for a report. It didn't matter that there was not a set meeting on any specific day or at any particular time. Erik thought Antoinette should know him well enough by now to realize he would be waiting for information of his soon to be former guest.

Seeing the woman before him now after having such a short time ago used her in his vile fantasy drew blood into Erik's cheeks. Mary stood slightly behind Antoinette.

To cover his unease he barked out as he swung the door wider, "Well it is about damn time. I do not pay you to dawdle. My time is precious. I do not have time to sit about waiting for you."

Antoinette seemed unfazed by the fierce looking man before her as he shouted and cursed at her. Mary could not help cowering behind Antoinette as if that diminutive woman could protect her.

"Erik this is Mary. Or at least for now she is Mary. Since she has no memory of who she is or where she came from I picked a name randomly. I thought as she may be studying to join the church I would call her Mary."

Mary peeped at her reluctant savior. During breakfast everyone had been all too eager to discuss the man of the house. They were all scared to death of him even as they admired him. It had been clear they respected him and would defend him against any outsider.

The women thought him a darkly handsome man. They claimed he could be one of those poor, tortured, handsome heroes in those romance novels. The younger ones giggled while the older staff members merely smiled as they nodded their heads in agreement.

Antoinette had looked around the kitchen as if she expected an intruder to be listening in. Her eyes had scanned around stopping at the mirror by the back door.

She had gone on to warn everyone that they should hold there opinions until far from the house as the walls had ears. Since she always warned them that someone could be listening they dismissed her warnings. Everyone who worked in the house was in the kitchen. Who but the master would be lurking about? The master rarely left his rooms and would not stoop to eavesdropping.

Recounting all they had said silently in her mind, Mary thought it best to make herself as invisible as possible. Not an easy task when she stood at least three inches taller than Antoinette who stood in front of her.

Pulling Mary into the room with her they brushed past Erik. Mary caught a whiff of something alluring coming from the man Antoinette had introduced as Erik.

"Antoinette are you sure this is not some ruse to gain our sympathy? Perhaps we have an opportunist in our mist, one hoping for a bit of charity."

"Erik stop that right now. Don't be so pessimistic. Mary will be staying with us until she remembers something or we find out who she is," Antoinette drew herself up as a stubborn look overtook her face.

"Might I remind you I am not a charitable institution nor do I plan to open a home for waifs and orphans." Erik's voice held cold contempt as he eyed Mary.

Mary felt her spine stiffen adding an extra inch to her height. She needed no charity from anyone. She'd not stay where she was not welcome. Mary was about to blast at this arrogant jackass when he continued before she could fire off a return volley in this little war that had been declared.

"Further more if she must stay then put her to work. I'll not feed or cloth a lay about. She looks perfectly healthy to me. Set her to work in the kitchen. I will leave her duties up to you. Just keep me informed as to whether she carries her weight or not. I'll not hesitate to send her packing if she thinks to use me to line her pockets with nothing in return."

Mary was cut off once more before she could speak. This time it was Antoinette who spoke out.

"Erik, shame on you for being so uncharitable. As a matter of fact I had already had in mind assigning Mary to clean your own quarters. Since you frightened Lily half to death as well as every other maid you employ we are in need of someone to clean the upper floors."

_**Oh no. I will not have that…that mermaid in my private space. She is far too much of a distraction. **_Erik nearly bellowed these objections out loud. He could not have her here. He'd be in a constant state of frustration and arousal.

If they thought him to be disagreeable now wait until his frustrations went to work on his temperament. If they only but knew that the last time he had been in want and denied an opera house with close to a thousand people inside had nearly burned to the ground.

"No absolutely not. If I am to have someone you will come and do what needs to be done. I'll not have this…this stranger mucking around in my things. Who knows if she has light fingers or not?"

Antoinette gasped at Erik's unfounded attack on Mary. Mary stared in stony dislike at the man making such unwarranted accusations about her.

For a half penny she'd spit in his eyes then smile as she waved good-bye. She unfortunately did not have that luxury. Not having anywhere to go was a daunting reality for her. Here with this rude, crass, know it all was better than the alternative.

Swallowing her pride Mary bowed her head to say with as much respect as she could muster, "Sir, I beg of you please let me prove myself. Whatever I was before I have no memory of it now. I have no wish to take from anyone. I will earn my keep. I will work hard. My hands tell me I am not unfamiliar with hard work of the manual kind."

To prove her point Mary held out her hands palms upward then turned them to show the backsides. Calluses could be seen on her palms and the backs were red and cracked. The skin was very dry. Not the hands of a woman who lived idly. They also were not the hands a woman so young should have. Antoinette had guessed her age to be between 21 and 25. Her face was free of wrinkles from age. She appeared to be healthy other than the loss of her memory.

"Erik give it a few days. If you can honestly find something displeasing in her work I will find a place for her myself. Do not forget that once someone gave you a chance at life. Do not forget that you alone took this persons livelihood away with devastating results."

Antoinette was not above a little blackmail if it got her what she wanted. She knew Erik would always be grateful for what she had done all those years ago even if in the end things had gone into some of Erik's darkest moments.

Erik threw up his hands in silent surrender. He would not give her the satisfaction of hearing him say the words that gave her the victory in this little standoff.

When Erik turned back toward the piano taking a stack of papers into his hand Antoinette took this as his capitulation. Taking Mary's upper arm gently in her hand Antoinette signaled with her head they should leave him. They had not made it through the door when Erik tossed one last thing over his shoulder.

"By the way the list of things to order for the servant's quarters is on the hall table. Please add a couple dozen fine linen handkerchiefs," and if as an afterthought he added, "Order small rugs also...for the servant's quarters."

"Erik I just bought a dozen kerchieves last month. What in the world do you do with them? I have bought a dozen every month since we have been here. Now you want two dozen? For a man of your genius you are terribly forgetful of what you do with something so simple as a handkerchief. If this was a prison and you were a prisoner, I would think you were making a rope to use in your escape. I will add them to the list. Some day I will learn what you do with them all, mark my words."

Erik heard the click of the door. In anticipation of the tension to come Erik had thought one dozen handkerchiefs not enough.

With only Christine's memory to fuel his lustful thoughts, that had been enough. Now he had this, mermaid, this siren from the sea here to tempt and tease him. Damnation. If he had to have his libido reawakened why could God not send someone he would at least have a fair chance to win? Erik could only silently wonder what this new torment would have him destroying. All of England perhaps?


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

**Angels and Demons**

Bright and early an expected knock sounded on the wooden door. Mary was already awake when Lizzy came to knock on the door of the closet underneath the stairs. It was only used to store odds and ends as Erik did not keep any of his cloaks or outerwear on the floor below his rooms. Mary's stubborn argument that the small airless place would give adequate shelter won Antoinette's begrudging agreement to allow the occupation for the time being. The stubborn set of her own lips would be proof to those who know her that the matter would be raised again.

Both Lizzy and Antoinette's offer to share their living space Mary refused not knowing exactly why. Privacy although sometimes a lonely prospect felt like something not often experienced. Now a small cot and table with a lamp decorated Mary's temporary home. Not owning any clothing to call her own there didn't seem to be any need for a dresser until more clothing could be purchased.

Shamefully Mary allowed Antoinette think privacy to be the key reason for not wanting to move into the small cottage with the other woman. The master of the house might be a murderous lunatic and yet he seemed preferable to the alternative. Better the devil you knew than the one lurking in the unknown waiting to catch you unawares. The very thought of the outdoors nearly had Mary retreating to the safety of her cubbyhole under the stairs and never coming out again.

Whatever had happened to her must have been so terrifying she could not even face going out into the open. She only felt safe with walls around her, very close confining walls. Close confines felt familiar and therefore equated safety.

Mary had refused the offers of more clothing other than the uniform for her duties as a maid. Lizzy told her to keep the uniform she had given her yesterday. She felt certain in her former life such luxuries as a number of dresses was not something she had known or expected. She felt comfortable in the plain black skirt with the white blouse. The apron nearly swallowed her whole but it would keep her uniform clean. Not having an abundance of hair it did not require she tuck any of it under the white maid's cap.

The laundry room was at the back of the house just down from the kitchen. Of necessity Mary had asked where to find that room as she would have need of it soon. Mary thought that if she was careful she could get two days wear out of the skirt and blouse. If she offered to wash a few other things that might curry favor with his high and mighty Mr. Lefèvre.

Lizzy had brought her another dress, this one an unbecoming brown. This uniform was for the kitchen staff. Maids wore the black skirt with the white blouse. The white cap could be used for both. No one had heard what specific duties Mary would be assigned so they reckoned it would be alright to wear whichever outfit she had clean. No one would mind really.

She would wear the skirt and blouse today then the brown dress tomorrow. Two outfits should be sufficient for a scullery maid who did not know anyone nor did she have any wish to go anywhere. What did it really matter what clothing she wore to do housecleaning as long as she did the work?

Looking in the mirror Mary shrugged her shoulders at the wholesome picture she presented. She would never set the world on fire or catch the eye of a handsome man. Perhaps her plain looks and lack of position in life had led her to serving the church.

She could honestly say she did not feel overly religious, not that she did not believe in God or respect his commandments. She just did not feel the compulsion to worship as someone who would be devoting their life to Christ's teachings.

It struck her as odd that she could know with conviction these things about her but not know something as important as her name. The brain was a mysterious thing to be sure.

Antoinette had gone to town to place Mr. Erik's order. Lizzy told her that the Master did not like to be called Mr. Lefèvre. He told them if they must address him as anything let it be Mr. Erik. Lizzy thought it might be because he would actually like for them to call him master but did not want to seem too overbearing so he settled for Mr. Erik.

Mary very much doubted that _**Mr. Erik**_ had any concerns whatsoever about sounding pompous or overbearing. He seemed to relish wallowing in both when she had met him.

Taking cleaning supplies from the closet Lizzy had shown her earlier Mary trudged up the stairs. She had a list of what she was supposed to accomplish today.

His majesty's bath would need a thorough cleaning. Linens on his bed changed. Laundry that did not make it to the laundry chute would need to be collected.

Polishing the hall floor would be the last thing she did. She could skip his music room as Antoinette told her he only allowed someone in to clean the floors and dust every few days and then for only a short time.

The bedrooms not in use would only need the sweeper run over them and dusted. She was to open the windows briefly to let them air out.

Antoinette had told Mary that Erik would be in his music room by now. He may well have even slept in there. His bedroom seemed the place to start.

Mary knocked on the door just to be safe. She did not need any more black marks against her. She opened the door cautiously. The ogre did not seem to be in bed. The covers were mussed so he had been to bed.

Mary leisurely strolled around trying to get a feel for the man. He obviously liked beautiful things. She could see nothing of a personal nature anywhere other than clothing and a brush and comb on the dresser. The mirror had a black cloth draped over it. She supposed that had something to do with the mask he wore. Everyone warned her not to ask about the mask.

Most of the room was decorated in black. Only the draperies at the windows and the bed had any color in them. Gold and cream swirled about in an erratic pattern. There were some sort of oriental rugs placed around the room. They too had color, reds, gold and dark blue.

Such opulence she could not help think was wasted on a man that found no pleasure in any of it. Having collected all the stray clothing Mary took them down the hall so she could drop them down the chute that led to the laundry room which took up the whole back portion of the house.

Returning Mary picked up her pail and cleaning materials to go into the bathroom. She opened the door as she tried to juggle everything without dropping anything.

Having her head down she did not at first see the man standing before the sink. A man in front of a sink would have surprised her but what caused her to nearly drop everything and run for cover was the fact that he was bare butted naked.

Erik stood before the mirror over the sink shaving. Mary could not look away even though her mind shouted for her to do so before he saw her. He'd likely kill her for having seen him in such a state. Antoinette had warned her that he was very sensitive about his mask. If seeing his face brought his wrath down on the poor soul foolish enough to be caught in that predicament what in God's green earth would the man do to someone seeing...seeing everything, every blessed thing?

Erik caught movement out of the corner of his eye. He turned abruptly with his razor raised in mid stroke. Rage boiled up instantly ready to spill out and consume anyone in its path in a fiery burst of anger.

Mary dropped everything, turned then ran as fast as she could. Her heart beat so fast she thought it surely would pound right out of her chest. Running down the stairs she continued to the door. Opening the door Mary went to step out but could not take that first step. Panic, even worse than her fright of Mr. Erik's wrath, kept her from moving another inch.

Shakily she looked over her shoulder. She could still hear him bellowing dire threats and curses at her. If he caught her she would surely die. Lack of clothing would only delay him a minute at the most. She needn't to hide or die.

Running to her little closet Mary locked the door and jammed a small chair under the knob. Looking around she concluded she had just imprisoned herself in a place she could not escape without going back out into the jaws of that hellacious beast howling upstairs in anger. She had backed herself into a corner leaving no avenue for escape.

Hunkering down in the corner at the end of the cot appeared to be the only option for awaiting retribution. She could not say how long she sat there with her arms wrapped around her legs. It was long enough for everything from the waist down to go numb.

She could hear shouting, furniture being tossed about and an angry male voice cursing her into oblivion. Oh dear Lord this man Erik had saved her from a watery grave only to send her to her maker by his own hand. Fearfully she clutched at her throat wrapping both hands around the thin column of vulnerable flesh as if that might save her.

Now Mary could hear other voices. Lizzy. Antoinette. Jacob. Katy. Davy and Brielle. Erik's could be heard above all. She pressed her fist to her mouth. Tears began to poor down her cheeks. Unconsciously words of prayer fled between lips nearly frozen by fright.

A prayer she did not even know she remembered silently crossed her lips. As she sat there another time when she had sat just as she was now waiting for another man to come get her came in a flash followed by an even greater fear than before.

Closing her eyes to allow the memories to come as they would Mary waited to see what else would be revealed. She could feel the heaving back and forth of the ship. There was a storm the like of witch not many had ever witnessed or lived to tell about.

Mary could see she was below deck hiding. The captain had told her to hide he'd hold them off as long as he could. His body had fallen down in front of her. They had tossed him down hoping to frighten her out of her hiding place. His bloodied body dropping down inside the open hatch had nearly drawn her from her hiding place.

She had been too petrified to move. The images were receding. Pressing her fist to her forehead Mary willed them to return. She needed to know more. What good was that memory other than to know someone wanted her dead?

She had no name or face of who chased her. How could she protect herself against them when she didn't even know who they were or how many were after her?

The turning of the knob drove away the remnants of her memory. Wide-eyed she listened as a shoulder rammed against the wooden door. It would not hold long. Another jolt splintered the doors top hinge. Another had the door coming open as it scooted the ineffectual chair along with it.

Mary did not see the towering shadow of a man hovering over her, rage oozing from every pour. The eyes trained on her held death in their depths. Gritting teeth and snarling lips did not faze her at all for Mary had passed into the world of blessed darkness.

"Well damnation. I am to be denied even my moment of retribution. Cowardly wench. Just like a woman to fall back on the easy way out," Erik growled less fiercely than he would like as he gazed down upon his captured prey. Antoinette would skin him for causing her sea urchin distress.

Too late now to wish curiosity and distress had not led him into examining the bit of flotsam the sea tossed on his shore. Why a mermaid and not a merman?

**A/N: Sorry it is so short. I'll try to edit the next chapter and get it up in a day or so as a consolation gift. **


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Goodness, if it isn't one thing it's another. First I couldn't get logged in for a couple days then when I went to post the next chapter I discovered it did not transition from the last chapter. I realized somehow I lost the chapter in-between and didn't discover it until recently. Guess I wrote the chapter but forgot to save it. Been there, done that. **

**Anyway I went back and added to this chapter so it makes more sense. I hope it does at least. Forgive me if it doesn't. I took down the old chapter five and posted the new one so when you get the alert I hope it isn't confusing. **

**Chapter Five**

**Baring the Phantom's Soul**

Mary stayed in the land of oblivion until late in the evening. She did not hear all the shouting between Erik and Antoinette.

"She must go. I do not care if she must sleep in the fields she will not spend another day in my home. She saw me Antoinette. All of me. She won't want to stay anyway. Did she not faint at the site of me?" Erik stalked about in agitation as he raised his fists in the air shouting so loudly people in the next county could hear him Antoinette felt certain.

"Erik stop being melodramatic. Sometimes I think you should have gone on the stage. The world lost a great actor when you decided to stay buried underground.

Yes Mary saw your face. That is not what caused her to faint. Did you not say she saw…well saw much more of you than she should have? She did not faint at the sight of you then."

"No she was far too busy running from the monster," Erik said bitterly.

"Erik she ran from your anger not what she saw of your face. How much could she have seen anyway? You did say you were shaving and had shaving cream on.

I myself would have ran all the way to town if it saved me from one of your rages being directed at me. You are a fearsome sight Erik when you lose control. Someone made of sterner stuff than Mary or I would have trouble facing you when you let that inner demon in you out."

"I still say she must go. I…I couldn't have her here knowing what I look like without my mask. I couldn't bear to see her pity or the fear in her whenever she saw me. No, it is best she goes as soon as she wakes. I will pay for lodgings for a week or so until she decides where she wishes to go. That is the extent of my generosity."

The stubborn set of Erik's mouth told Antoinette he would not budge tonight. His anger and hurt were too raw to let him back down now. Tomorrow perhaps when he had calmed down she could talk some sense into him.

Antoinette left Erik in his sitting room off his bedroom to return to the lower level. She would apprise everyone that things were calm for tonight. She'd tackle Mr. Erik again tomorrow.

When she had come back from town early this morning all hell had broken loose. Erik was ranting and raving like he did when on the verge of losing all sane thought.

Lizzy and Brielle, the two downstairs maids didn't know what had happened other than Mr. Erik had come down tearing the place apart going on and on about Mary seeing his face.

He had frightened them badly. They thought he meant to kill Mary. Antoinette was not so sure they were wrong in their assumption.

Mary had committed a heinous trespass against Erik. She had seen him naked, not only without clothing, but without his mask. The latter to Erik would be the greater offence.

Antoinette had followed Erik around as he carelessly tossed furniture out of his path. He nearly tore doors off their hinges in his angry search for Mary.

The front door had been standing wide open. Apparently

Erik had raged around outside for half an hour. Coming to the conclusion Mary had not left the house he had taken his destruction back inside.

When Erik had gone to the closet under the stairs where Mary's temporary room was Antoinette thought he would kill the woman when he found the door locked.

He would not even listen to Antoinette as he had shouldered the door open splintering it off its hinges. Mary had sat huddled in the corner in some sort of terrified fit.

She did not seem to even know Antoinette had gone to her. The screams emitting from her had sounded like nothing Antoinette had ever heard in her life and wished never to hear again. Mary was clearly gripped by some paralyzing fear. She had fainted dead away in the end.

Erik had not had to even touch her to achieve his goal of frightening her to death. Antoinette had then proceeded to upbraid Erik for his actions. He in turn had shouted and raged about Mary's trespass in his private sanctuary. What brought Erik to such fury had been his naked face and Mary's supposed reaction to having seen him.

Antoinette had reasoned that Erik had roared at her like a lunatic chasing her with threats of reprisal for her offence. Who wouldn't run given those circumstances? Antoinette sure as hell would and she had known Erik for twenty some years.

Calming Erik had not been an easy task. He had still been mumbling his threats against Mary as he had climbed back up the stairs to dress properly. In his haste to chase Mary down he had simply donned his trousers and thrown on a shirt without bothering to button it. He had even left his feet bare.

Lizzy and Brielle both had looked on in wide-eyed wonder at the master only partially dressed. If Erik had taken a moment to notice he would have seen the admiration in their eyes for his fine physique. They feared him yes, but at the same time he held them in awe.

After Erik had stormed upstairs Antoinette had asked Jacob the gardener and Jack of all trades to carry Mary into her little cubbyhole.

Antoinette shook her head in confusion as to why anyone would prefer to live in what was a closet, a roomy closet, but still a closet. Mary had been offered several alternatives.

Perhaps her choice had to do with having lived a cloistered simple life in a convent. If she had been living a simplistic life as she waited to take her final vows that might explain why she preferred living in this small space alone.

Mary came around just after midnight. Antoinette had once again taken vigil in a chair. This one quite small and not the least bit comfortable.

Opening her eyes Mary saw Antoinette in the chair with her neck leaning at an uncomfortable angle. She'd have a stiff and sore neck in the morning.

"Antoinette," Mary called softly so as not to startle the woman.

Antoinette roused. Opening her eyes she blinked then focused on Mary. Sitting up straight she asked Mary how she was feeling.

"Foolish. I am ashamed of my reaction but he did frighten me when he began to bellow like he did. I can't say why I took to my heels or why I barricaded myself in. Something in me just drove me to seek safety.

He isn't horrid looking at all. Not as bad as one imagines he looks underneath that mask. What happened to the poor man?"

Now that things had quieted and Mary had time to recover she could find it in her to be sympathetic for the dear man's plight.

"He was frightening while in his tirade but I don't think it was his threats I was afraid of. I had flashes of another man. This man really would have killed me if he found me.

Mr. Erik…would he…he wouldn't really have harmed me would he?" Mary asked with less conviction than she would have liked.

"Mary I am sorry you had to witness his temper the way you did. It wasn't even that you caught him na…indisposed. It was more that you may have seen his face than any other part of him. Did you see him, all of him?"

Mary cast her eyes down her face flushing. She had seen every bit of Mr. Erik. Front and back. The face he was so worried about had not been what burned into her mind. She could recall ever sinewy muscle that made up his enticing person.

The face had been a mess on the right side but Mary had a feeling she had worked with people who had worse afflictions.

The man simply put too much emphasis on a small part of him that God had made flawed. The rest of him had been perfect in symmetry and form.

If everyone was to be believed he played musical instruments divinely and sang with a voice heavens choir would envy. Mary could not understand why he had become so violent over something that had not done any real harm.

If she had gasped in horror or screamed he might have had reason for his display of anger. Well perhaps not to the level he had gone but he would have a right to be angry. She had done nothing to offend him.

If he had not reacted with such a threatening manner she would have turned tail and ran to her little closet in embarrassment. She would have stayed there until things had blown over. Eventually she would have searched him out to beg his pardon and leniency.

"Antoinette why was he so violent? It doesn't make sense."

"I cannot tell the whole story but I will tell you that Erik from the time he was born has had nothing but ridicule and pain heaped on him.

A lot of it was because he is unwilling to take a chance on humanity. He does not think anyone can accept how he looks. He allows his face to be the master of his fate.

Until he can come to terms with things I fear he will always live as a recluse. He hides himself away and his considerable talents.

Erik has not been a good man. His circumstances have not afforded him the opportunity to be anything other than what he is.

It is in his hands to change things. He must make some attempt in life to join the rest of us who struggle along to find our place in life. I live in hope that Erik will one day find what he is looking for, what he deserves. Happiness is not a commodity Erik has had even a taste of as of yet. Not any real happiness.

There was a time a few years ago when I thought he had found what he needed. I thought he had someone who would lead him out of the darkness. Alas it was a fool's dream. It was only an illusion he had built up out of his desperation.

Enough for tonight. Sleep in tomorrow as I plan to do. I will speak to Erik and try to smooth things over. Regardless of what he does I will not let him turn you out without making certain you will be cared for and safe."

Antoinette saw Mary's eyes droop. The poor girl had had a time of it the last few days. Most people would have been catatonic after such an ordeal. Mary had a stronger constitution and harder makeup than most.

The wheels began to turn in Antoinette's head. Erik needed a challenge. This morose attitude could not go on much longer. If left in the depths of his misery Erik might not ever climb out.

Mary seemed as if she could withstand Erik's worst displays of anger. Oh if only something would spark between them. Erik needed a feminine influence. Not a mother or sister, he had that somewhat in Antoinette herself. What he needed was someone who would stroke his flagging ego and build his confidence as a man.

She had thought in the beginning it would be Christine but things had not turned out well in that association. Antoinette blamed herself for the final disaster which is why she continued to serve Erik instead of finding her own life.

Until she could be sure of his place in the world Antoinette could not in good conscience leave him to deal with the harsh realities of life alone. Erik needed someone who could temper his worst reactions to things that displeased him. It seemed lately most things displeased him.

Instructing Mary to help in the kitchen until she had a chance to speak with Erik, Antoinette bid her good-night. Antoinette closed the door which Jacob had fixed temporarily with a few lengths of wire. Promising herself Mary would not sleep in a closet for one more night Antoinette sought her own bed. She'd not stand for any ridiculous objections or protests from anyone. Neither Erik nor Mary.

Erik fumed up in his bedroom. He would not admit to feeling any hurt because of that woman's reaction to him. No matter what Antoinette said he knew the truth of things. Had he not relived this same scenario many times?

Even Christine's initial reaction had been horror when she viewed him for the first time. Hell he even disgusted and horrified himself so what could he expect from others?

The woman would go if he had to cart her off himself. He had stood in the hall listening to Antoinette and that woman, Mary, discuss him. The grate that allowed heat from the boiler to enter underneath the stairs served as a wonderful listening device. When he could stomach no more of their lies he had stormed into his room

Erik did not believe a word that woman had uttered about fearing his rage more than his face. He knew how monstrous he was. Had it not been shown to him over and over that no one could accept him, love him? Those paltry emotions were not for him. Only hatred and rejection would be what he could expect out of this life.

Erik ran his hand down over his unmasked face, just for a moment wanting to believe someone could look at him and not think him the devil himself.

Cursing Erik raised his hand and knocked everything from the mantle with one swift swipe of his hand. Having vented a little of his anger Erik dropped to his knees with his hands covering his face as he rocked back and forth.

Erik had never felt so alone in his life. To have experienced those all too brief years with Christine then have nothing ate at his spirit, dragging him further into despair.

He cried out his beloved's name sending her a message that her Angle of Music had been in hell since he last saw her sweet face.

His face awash in tears of agony Erik lifted his head to look upward crying out for mercy. He begged for death to come and claim him. He wanted no more of this life lived in solitude. He wanted no part of his music that only served to remind him all he had to offer that was good and beautiful that no one wished to hear.

Growing weary Erik crawled over to his bed. He did not even have the strength to pull himself up onto the bed. Perhaps he would come down with some malady that would end this never-ending cycle of torment. When he closed his eyes as sleep overcame him Erik hoped his eyes would not open to see another sunrise. He had lived his life in darkness now he wanted to die in darkness.

Antoinette, worried about Erik did something normally she would not allow herself or anyone else to do. She went upstairs after hours to knock on Erik's door. Damned if she would stand at the top of the stairs while calling out his name. Now that, she felt certain, would earn the master's displeasure.

Several tentative knocks accompanied by soft calls of his name remained unanswered. Wringing her hands in nervous indecision changed to urgent determination as a muffled cry reached the ear pressed to the door panel. Willing to face termination of her employment should Erik prove to only sleeping restlessly a trembling hand turned the doorknob then came the gasp of horror upon seeing the feverish man lying awkwardly on the bed.

One hand lain upon a burning forehead was enough to have Antoinette running to the kitchen as she called out in a voice not suitable for a proper lady within the walls of a home, one not her own at that.

Clutching at her side she breathlessly gasped out, "Mr. Erik is ill. Lizzy fetch Jacob. Brielle, fetch fresh towels from the pantry along with several wash clothes. Mary, go to my cottage and fetch the black leather bag sitting on the hall table. Bring to Mr. Erik's room at once."

Everyone moved with repressed urgency. To show fear by openly acting as if every second counted made the possibility of what could happen all too real. The master did not take care of himself properly, who better to know such things than those who lived and worked under his roof every day? Death among the poor was something accepted not without pain but with a sense of inevitability. Those having riches beyond their wildest dreams seemed to fare better in deaths arena.

God and Erik were on tenuous terms at the best of times and did not care for outward signs of worship in others. This night everyone worked toward one goal while their lips moved in silent prayer. Whatever Mr. Erik felt or thought about God did not keep those who cared for him from calling on a higher power for divine intervention.

Only Mary and Antoinette remained once supplies were assembled and the patient settled into bed. Arching her back to relieve the strain of cramping muscles Antoinette said tiredly, "Go on to your bed Mary. It will be hours before there is any change. No sense in both of us losing a night's well deserved rest."

Eyeing the older woman Mary could see the older woman was on the verge of collapse while she felt wide awake from nervous energy.

"I doubt I shall sleep a wink. All this excitement has driven sleep away for tonight at least. Let me take care of him. It is the least I can do after…after my transgression before. I promise I shall take very good care of him. I have no reason to think myself capable of such care but something…some vague memory gives me the impression I am well versed in nursing those in a sickbed," she concluded on a positive note after only a small hesitation. In truth more horrible sights felt to be the norm rather than the oddity.

"If…if you are sure it will not be too much for you. Just be certain to leave before he wakes. Finding you in his bedchamber may push him to the limit. Who knows what hell he would put us all in upon waking and believing we have betrayed him. I…I will not ever let anyone hurt him or convince me to…well suffice it to say he and I are tied by an invisible chain until one of us passes into the afterlife," Antoinette tried to make a jest of her statement but knew all too well how close to the truth it was.

After helping Mary drag the large chair over to the bed Antoinette left muttering about the chair becoming a permanent bedside ornament.

An hour of up and down checking on the patient and shifting her body into a comfortable position Mary's head began to nod down toward her chest. Sleep just claimed her when a loud cry woke her with a jolt.

Her patient appeared to be in distress. While his skin felt warmer than it should for now the danger from a high fever had passed. What ailed the man now was some inner torment, some nightmare he could not escape.

Several times he called out a woman's name. Trying to give him comfort ended with a strong grip imprisoning her with no way to release his hold without waking him. That might have been the better solution under normal circumstances but nothing about this house or the people in it seemed normal, not even the unwelcome guest.

Thrashing body, pitiful cries, pleas for someone to come to him, to love him, nearly broke Mary's heart. Stroking his forehead gradually calmed it to the point he no longer moved as if in agony. Well and truly trapped now a plan must be made as to how a solution to this problem might be found.

Glancing around the room as if some inspiration could be found among the items within the room, Mary could see only one solution. They must share the bed, only for a short time; only until he slept peacefully then it would be safe to leave her patient.

Gingerly she sat down then lifted her legs then placed them cautiously beside Erik's partially covered legs. Before coming to rest fully a sudden tug upon her hand drew her beneath Erik's torso.

This would not do, this would not do at all. Inch by inch the pillow came further beneath her and all the while Erik's torso came to rest more comfortably upon Mary. By the time her head and shoulders rested against the headboard the now peaceful man found refuge lying with a warm body. Reminding herself this was necessary and by morning, long before he woke she would be gone.

What could it hurt to lie here while stroking his forehead so as to give him the touch of another human being? What harm could there be in letting him know he was not alone? Drifting into sleep the stroking hand in the end came to rest on a broad chest resting just where a steady heartbeat could be felt.

Slowly awareness came as the fog cleared inside Erik's mind. Senses returning brought to mind what last night he thought were only dreams, something conjured by a mind bereft of any nurturing memories.

Sitting up, eyes adjusting to the light and shadows within his room at last he could not avoid looking at his newest torment. The bold temptress dare mock and tease him in this way? For this the highest punishment would level the scales of justice. Realization just how little clothing he had on brought a tide of crimson up his neck and into his face. Not embarrassment but shame, humiliation and murderous rage filled every pore.

One large hand stretched across the peacefully sleeping woman's neck. Fingers tightened ever so slowly. So easily could a life be extinguished like a candle's flame dying from a breath of air passing between the lips. Rage mixed with pure hatred nearly won out over Erik's struggle not to repeat his past mistakes. Pledging on Christine's life he would never kill another soul saved the unsuspecting young woman. Saved her from death at least but perhaps in the days to come death might seem the lesser of two evils.

He would deal with her, deal very harshly with her but life would not be the coinage she paid.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six**

**Tenuous Threads of Friendship**

Erik had left his somewhat disheveled bedchamber trying to summon all his strength so he could face everyone this morning with a proud bearing as if nothing had gone amiss.

His priority at the moment was to chastise Antoinette for placing him in such an awkward situation. What had been on the woman's mind when she had left him in the care of someone who was for all intents and purposes still a stranger to him? One who had already earned his wrath once? Was she testing his resolve not to kill again?

After his tirade yesterday a sane person would have kept a wide berth between him and the object of his wrath. He could only think perhaps Antoinette was becoming senile.

She never would tell him her age as she thought that was a secret best kept between a woman and her God. He estimated she was perhaps some ten years older than he himself was. His mother, dear soul that she was, never saw fit to enlighten him as to when he had been born or even his surname. He guessed his age to be around thirty-three give or take a year.

Coming to a stop Erik searched for any remaining blind rage or even a mild dislike toward the resident mermaid. Slight irritation was all that remained. He dare not let himself become entangled with the woman. Whatever kindness she offered last night should be put firmly in the past.

He did feel anger but not the murderous rage as he had felt for most of his life when something had disturbed him. Overall he felt saddened and disheartened to have lost the last tangible pieces of Christine. No longer did her shrine grace the room below. Even last night he crawled about as before trying to find the smallest bit of evidence he had not dreamed his angel. Nothing other than haunting memories remained. Letting go was not an easy thing to do but searching the soul does bring with it some benefit.

Every day was spent regretting getting rid of everything. Perhaps he should have disposed of one thing at a time to give himself time to adjust. That would not have worked though for when it came to Christine he was weak.

Better to make an open wound so the infection might seep out. He did not like to think of Christine in this light but that is what she had been for him, a disease that infected his heart, mind and soul. Through no fault in her their relationship turned into a warped imitation of what it started out in the beginning.

From the first time he had sung to her as a child in comfort he had poured everything into her. Nothing but his music and Christine had mattered. For once life held meaning, promise of a future beyond the dark lifeless world holding him prisoner.

If he had been a man well versed in emotions of a softer nature perhaps he could have handled how he had begun to feel for Christine in a less obsessive way. Perhaps…

Erik scoffed silently in his mind. He had always been possessive of the few things he did have. He hated for anyone to touch anything he had a particular fondness for. A person who is denied much in their life tends to grasp tightly onto what they do have.

It did not take him long to find Antoinette. She was in her little sitting room, or rather his sitting room. There was a pot of tea as well as scones and strawberry jam. Someone had moved her side table closer to the fire so the tea and scones would stay warm. Antoinette sat in her usual chair knitting. An empty chair had been placed on the other side of the table.

She had either expected him or Mary. Noting the slight tremble in her hands she probably would have preferred Mary's company. Erik did not wish to alienate the one person who had stood beside him for most of his life. Reluctant steps took him further into the room. He stood over Antoinette until she could no longer pretend she was absorbed in her knitting and had not seen him come in.

Sighing loudly she still spoke in a somewhat timid voice for her, "Erik, do not hover over me. I have provided a chair, so sit. Are you very angry?" The last words were spoken in a whisper.

Erik remained silent for a moment so he could gather his thoughts and consider what he should say, contrary to what he would usually have done. At this point he would have been raging while he paced around her possibly throwing objects near her, not hitting her but close enough to worry her.

Erik sat hiding nerves suddenly overtaking his calm demeanor. Nothing could ever force any admission that sometimes Antoinette scared him more with her quiet tone than if she screamed at him. Tenting his fingers he pressed them against his lips. He had to let her know he did not care for her neglect of his privacy. She should not have let the woman stay knowing how he felt about his face.

"Oh I am angry Antoinette. It is lucky for you I have had some temporary lapse due to my recent illness. I shall simply warn you this time that if it happens again I will not be so forgiving."

Erik did not see the need to discuss with her the revelations he had gone through after finding the woman, Mary in is bed. He really should think of her as Mary. Had they not shared intimacies that would only have been shared by a couple very close to one another? Damn his racing mind giving vivid pictures of other forms of intimacy forever denied him.

He would deal with Mary later. He would perhaps send her out to the chicken coops. Cleaning those nasty things would give her time to think about her transgressions. Or perhaps he'd instruct Antoinette to have her polish the foyer woodwork then mop and wax the floor and hall. Hours on her hands and knees would let her know who was the master and who was the waif dragged from the sea.

"What…what of Mary? Don't be too harsh with her Erik. She only meant to help. As for removing your mask…well it was necessary. You were ill, running a temperature. She did not seem to be in the least affected by what she saw. There was no need for you to sneak off like a thief in the night. Mary was quite concerned about you until I explained how unpredictable you are. What do you intend to do? I will not let you shove her out into the cold to fend for herself."

"Do not think you can work on my softer side as you well know I do not have one. I think a few days spent performing the less savory chores might lesson my rancor toward her. Menial labor will remind her that she is merely a servant and therefore should not take advantage of my indisposition."

Standing abruptly Erik turned toward Antoinette with his hands behind his back. His head was lifted at an angle that suggested royalty and not the poor deformed creature he liked to think himself.

For all his claims that man shunned him Erik had a proud regal bearing that was as much a part of him as any feature upon his face. He wore this mantle to counter the insecurities he tried to hide beneath the layers of rage and anger at the world. He hated to feel vulnerable in any situation.

He no longer had thousands of theatre employees and managers under his tyranny so he now commanded his servants with that same overbearing attitude he had used at the opera house. The Master's employees could tell a different story. Each one had a reason to be loyal to him, not by force or threats but by kindness the man did not even recognize as such.

Erik never did sit to have his tea or scones. Antoinette really didn't think he would. He hated to eat when others were present in case he got something on his mask. That indignity he had foregone since Antoinette had known him as a young boy.

Once he had donned his mask he had begun to change. At first she had thought it was good for him to gain confidence. Soon she learned it wasn't so much confidence as a false arrogance he developed to hide the fact that underneath he was still that little boy who had been forced to live in a cage while customers gawked and pointed in either fright or unfeeling excitement.

Antoinette hoped this morning's leniency was the heralding of a new era for Erik. One in which he learned he need not strike out first to prevent himself from being hurt.

She sighed when she thought of poor Mary doing all those things Erik demanded she perform as punishment for having seen his bared face, not once but twice. That for Erik would be her worst crime. If she had stolen a fortune from him he would have been less apt to seek retribution. Well perhaps not. Erik took a dim view of anyone taking even the smallest thing from him. He had owned so few things in his life that what he had, he considered a sacred trust.

Antoinette took the tray of tea and scones intended for Erik down the hall to Mary. Opening the door she could see Mary sitting on the side of the cot running her fingers through her short hair.

"Ah, good you are looking better. I brought you some breakfast. Would you like to freshen up first?"

"Oh Madame how mad is he? Did he…is he going to send me away? I only meant to comfort him. I thought I would wake before him. Oh I am so embarrassed." Mary did not give Antoinette time to answer her questions. She dropped her head into her hands shaking her head in misery. Mary also felt slightly afraid of what would happen to her next. She knew no one. Darn it she did not even know herself.

"Relax Mary. This time his bark will be worse than his bite. I can't say he is happy with the turn of events but he did not blast me as I thought he might. All the furniture survived. I can't promise the next time he will be so lenient, with you, or me. We must be sure to stay on his good side. Although with Erik that is hard as he does not seem to have a good side that he is willing to share with others."

"He truly will allow me to stay? After…well after everything I did? It was quite improper to share his bed in that way even if I did it to comfort him when he suffered so badly. I think you are too harsh in your judgment of him. A less kind man would have thrown me out without a thought as to my welfare."

Antoinette wanted to disabuse Mary of the idea that Erik was in any way kind or thoughtful. He had only ever let a little of those emotions show toward Christine. Since her betrayal even that little spark of humanity had seemed to be snuffed out like a candle in the wind. Letting her gaze rest on the innocent vulnerability of the young woman before her it became clear giving Mary a better insight into Erik's mind and heart were necessary if everyone was to be kept from harm.

"Do not mistake this lapse in his usual bad-tempered demeanor. Don't let his largesse fool you. For whatever reason, he has taken a less harsh method of punishment to administer to you. You have not gotten off Scot-free. He has instructed me that you are to clean the coops then polish the foyer at the front of the house and the hallway. That task alone usually takes three people the whole day. The chickens I daresay are among the nastiest creatures on earth. You will not have a pleasant time of it today and tomorrow," Antoinette paused expecting a protest. When none came she continued to share her opinions with Mary as well as commiserate over things long left unspoken.

"As you will be staying with us, please call me Antoinette. Some simply call me Antoinette while others are too well ingrained with the manners of servants to feel comfortable with anything less than Madame Giry. Bernard, the butler will never stoop to call me anything other than Madame with that servile tone in is voice."

Mary had not met all of the staff inside or all the workers in the stables and gardens. Antoinette would make a point to introduce her formally to everyone later today. Many of the staff adhered to strict codes of proper and improper interaction between employer and servant.

Mary could have shouted out loud her relief not to have to worry about where she would lay her head tonight.

As if Antoinette read her mind she said, "We must find you a larger more acceptable place to stay. I think I know the perfect place. At the end of the hall on Erik's floor there is a room that I suppose was meant to be the nanny's room. It is next to what appears to be the nursery. Erik of course had those rooms closed off as he feels he will never have need of them."

"Madame…oh pardon me, Antoinette, why is he so mistrustful of everyone? He is so melancholy. I know his dreams were disturbing. I can understand a little of why a man with such a deformity would have some reservations about mixing with society in general but there are so many things he could enjoy that would not require that he expose himself to crowds. If he is as talented as you and the others have said why does he not share his gift?" she quizzed thoughtfully.

"Pardon me if I seem too bold but I simply cannot understand this life of solitude he has made for himself. He is a handsome man. I know many women would find him so. I…I myself could be counted among them. He did scare me of course with that grand tantrum he threw. But he was quite magnificent all the same. It is hard to explain in any words of my own so I shall borrow Lizzy and Brielle's. They claim he could be compared to those handsomely brooding men from those Jane Austin and Charlotte Bronte books they are reading. They compare him to every darkly romantic man in those novels women of breeding pretend not to read or even know of their existence."

Giving an unconscious sigh of admiration Mary continued, "He is a dashing hero to our heroine. He is the dashing, darkly brooding man who is full of bitterness against the world who only needs the love of the heroine to set his passions aflame. He does not see that I know, but I guess with his life thus far it would be hard for him to think in those terms about himself. I know Lizzy and Brielle find him attractive as proven by their hero worship of him. They have said as much also. Even when he is cursing and shouting they say he is a magnificent beast."

Thinking she may have gone too far from the bounds of propriety or let Lizzy and Brielle's secrets out without thinking Mary began to apologize once more.

Antoinette cut Mary off with a pleased smile on her face, one she tried to hide behind a serious look in her eyes and voice. It would not do to let her own secret plans out too soon.

Reassuring Mary that no harm had been done she instructed her to finish her breakfast. Antoinette sat and drank tea with Mary as she watched the girl from under lowered brows.

Mary did not sip tea as a lady of leisure would. She drank deeply each time she brought the cup to her lips while holding it between her hands.

Little bits of butter and jam were licked from fingers in the same ill-mannered way all the servants did unless trying to impress someone. They knew the proper etiquette and could immolate it with ease, they just did not see the need for it among their peers. They all were common working folks who did not put on airs.

When they had finished their breakfast Antoinette had rung the bell pull in the hall that would call for a maid to come fetch the tray while Antoinette showed Mary the nanny's room.

Lizzy who came for the tray winked saucily at Mary having heard the conversation between Madame and Mr. Erik, at least the part where he had agreed to let her stay with them. She wished she could have been privy to the whole conversation but she had been helping clear away in the kitchen, then Mr. Erik had rung from the dining room for his breakfast to be brought there. That was a shocker for sure as he never had done that before. With a whispered, "Welcome to our happy family," Lizzy left with a flounce of her skirts.

The room Antoinette showed Mary was not as small as the closet but only slightly bigger than Lizzy's room. There was a window and a small balcony with double doors lending access to it. The furniture consisted of a small bed, rocking chair, wardrobe, and small wingback chair with a small round table beside it. There was a lamp affixed to the wall over the bed as well as one on the table.

Opening a door opposite the fire place Antoinette showed Mary the private bath. This was truly luxury for a girl who…who…the thought flitted into her mind then quickly receded. It frustrated Mary no end that she could recall mundane things but nothing substantial about herself.

The fireplace would need to be cleaned as well as the chimney. Mary said she could take care of this herself. How she knew how to do this she could not bring that information to her mind. She just knew she could.

Mary told Antoinette she would bring her things upstairs after she had finished her chores for the day. They parted ways downstairs so each could attend to their neglected duties.

Erik had taken his place behind the wall of the closet so he might listen in on Antoinette's conversation with Mary. One did not break habits of many years in one day. Much to his frustration he had not seen the need to place a mirror in the closet under the stairs. Only luck had him building a narrow passageway from one side of the stairs leading to a turn in the wall on the other. He had to resort to pressing his ear to the exposed plaster of the wall.

The words Mary had spoken had at first smacked of pity which Erik had gorged on for many years. He wanted no part of her pity. When she had continued on she had shocked him greatly to use words such as handsome, heroic, and magnificent in connection with him.

Could she speak the truth or perhaps did she know he would be listening? Had Antoinette told her of his secret passages and observation mirrors? No, Antoinette would not betray him like that again. She had given her word never to betray him in any way. She had even sworn on the life of her daughter Meg.

Erik's first thought was to go and confront this Mary for the lying chit she was. She could not possibly think him handsome. No one in his entire life had thought him worthy of the waste of a loaf of bread to feed him.

She must have some ulterior motive for saying those things. Perhaps she thought to soften Antoinette toward her so that Antoinette would approach him to be merciful thereby reducing her workload.

He would not budge. He was on to her game now. He'd watch her, trailing her all day if need be. If he caught her slacking off or enticing Jacob to lighten her burden he'd toss her out on her ear. He'd not be made a fool of.

True to his word to himself Erik did find excuses to be near where Mary happened to be during the day. If at times he seemed less interested in her work ethics and more interested in observing the upward turn of her lips or listening to her musical laughter, he chose not to notice.

When she cleaned the chicken coops he brought out his stallion Demon to brush and check his shoes. This gave Erik a clear line of vision toward the chicken coop as it was just a short distance from the barn and stables.

Bucket after bucket Mary carried out filled with the dirty straw used to make the nesting area and line the floor of the wooden structure.

While she was at it she collected the eggs and fed the chickens. There were a few ducks on the pond behind the house that Mary thought would appreciate a little corn.

Coming back she came upon Lizzy and Brielle hanging out the day's laundry. Since one of the uniforms was Mary's she lent them a hand. They giggled and discussed just what they would look for in a mate.

Mary blushed but laughed all the same at their outrageous qualifications in the man of their dreams. Such men Mary felt sure only existed in fairy tales or those novels with handsome heroes.

Lizzy and Brielle both had men who held their interest. Lizzy told Mary Jacob had been shyly courting her in silence for almost a year. One day soon she thought he might muster the courage to ask her for a walk or perhaps a picnic by the pond.

Brielle liked one of the stable boys, his name was Charlie. He and Brielle were saving to get married. They almost had enough to rent the cottage at the back of Mr. Erik's property. As soon as they had the security as well as a month's expenses they would elope saving the cost of the wedding.

When Mary would have left the area of the barnyard to head toward the back of the house Erik had hopped up on Demon bareback. He would exercise the animal for a while. If he happened to ride close enough to listen in on the women's conversation that could not be helped. After all it was his property and he could come and go as he pleased.

The three women spying Erik astride his horse paused for a moment to admire the striking figure he made. Even without the saddle he looked impressive. He was every woman's fantasy of a knight in shining armor or Prince Charming come to save her from the drudge of her ordinary life.

Erik passed them inclining his head slightly as a gentleman should. The ladies curtsied in return. Mary felt odd flutters in her stomach. She recalled vividly how his head had felt nestled against her breast. Flushing scarlet Mary bent down to grab a sheet to cover her discomfort.

She forgot that she had intended to return indoors to begin her indoor duties. Erik wiped every thought out of her head other than thoughts of him.

Hiding behind the sheet Mary draped it over the line. Brielle and Lizzy at last tore their gaze from Erik to help Mary hang the sheet.

Erik grew bored riding around in a circle that kept him close to his quarry. When he could stand it no more he gave up and returned an angry Demon to his stall.

The stallion had thought they would be going for one of their long rides where his master let him have his head. Now after only a slow paced circling he was put back in his stall. The fit he threw could well have compared to one of Erik's.

Calming the beast had not been easy. Erik had sung softly to him then promised a nice long ride after dark. He'd take him to the far side of the property and let him run until he could no longer keep up the pace.

Erik went to his music room. He did not sit at his piano. Pacing about the room Erik's mind went over everything that had taken place the last few days. Something had shifted in him or something in his fate seemed to have moved to a different path.

Mary he deduced had been the catalyst. What this change would bring about he couldn't say. Nothing in his life had ever been positive other than his music and even that had led him nearly to destruction.

Whatever this new person would bring to his life could not be good as nothing had ever been good that came from change for him. Even when Antoinette had freed him from the cage at the fair he had only exchanged one prison for another.

The opera house had been a somewhat more pleasant prison but a prison without bars is what it had been. Erik had been trapped underneath that building as surely as if he had been entombed there.

Even the destruction of the opera house had not freed him from the hold that world had on him. In his dreams he relived every year he had spent there.

The years with Christine had been both the best and worst of his life. He could not say he had been precisely happy but he had found some little bit of contentment in what small role he had played in Christine's life.

He had thought himself the be all and end all for her. Delusions of grandeur had given a false reality. She had never been destined for him. She and Raoul had been meant to be since childhood.

Fate had only played Erik for a fool. He'd not make that mistake again. No woman was meant to share his miserable life. If he had the courage he would not live any longer with what he had to look forward to for the rest of his life.

Erik felt the dark depression weighing down on him. He would not let it happen this time. Leaving his music room as if chased by demons Erik went down to seek the comfort of his hidden room.

The grief that hit him upon seeing all the emptiness drove him to his knees. What had he done? Now he did not even have this.

How could he have rid himself of the only solace he had? Looking around he saw nothing that would bring him any closer to Christine. All that remained was the remnants in the grate of the fireplace.

Crawling on hands and knees Erik reached in to grab a handful of ash. He brought it to his lips as he let out a mournful cry. He rocked his body to and fro as he sobbed out in his pain.

"Oh God! Christine I am sorry. I cannot live without some tangible piece of you. Something, there must be something left." Erik crawled frantically around looking in every corner of the room for some small thing he had missed when burning Christine's things.

At last he found a shoe buckle she had lost one night when he had been giving her a lesson. After she had left Erik had left his place within the wall to pick up this precious memento. He kissed it now fervently, reverently. He brought it to his chest to hold it against him tightly.

He had thought he could simply rid himself of her hold over him by ridding himself of those pitiful keepsakes he had collected over time.

Erik crawled over to the wall so he could lean against the solid stone. As he fingered that buckle Erik felt less a man than he had before.

Christine had been right. He was a pitiful creature of darkness. A damned buckle she had lost from a shoe held him enthralled. What sort of man would have reverence for such a thing other than a hopeless fool such as he had always been?

Anger at himself had him throwing the buckle across the room. He would not crawl around again to find it. Not again today. Perhaps another time, when he had need of some small reminder of Christine he would again crawl around like a worm on the ground. For today he had had enough degradation served to him for a whole meal.

Wiping his eyes then inhaling deeply Erik stood on unsteady feet. His head felt as if an ax had been driven into his skull. Raising his hand to his forehead he felt the hot clamminess there.

Perhaps it had not been wise to go outside today then crawl around on this damp floor. He needed to get to his bed before he fell back to the floor and stayed there to either die or to stay hidden until his flesh rotted from his bones. Erik chuckled at his morbid thoughts. He always had to think in the darkest terms.

Even with Christine it had been that way. Murder, blackmail, threats. All those he had used to win Christine for all the good it had done him. He had bartered his soul for her hand only to end up with nothing but trinkets to serve as his lover.

They were cold comfort compared to what Raoul or other men had. Now he did not even have that. He had a damn shoe buckle, somewhere. Erik laughed deliriously as he walked back to his room. His hand pressed to the wall to keep him upright Erik finally came to the panel that opened into the cellar. He climbed upward seeking the way to his bedchamber. Soon he had made his way to his bed. He dropped down just in time to lose consciousness.

That evening when Antoinette did not receive her daily summons from Erik to come speak with him in his upstairs study she went to make sure he had not had a relapse either from his illness of mind or heart.

They had not worried at lunch. Well perhaps one person had worried about Erik. Mary had been asking if they should not ask if he wished for his afternoon repast. Antoinette had told her that Erik often missed meals when composing or thinking over some problem.

Antoinette could not help but notice how often during the day Mary had stopped to gaze worriedly up the stairs as she cleaned and waxed the foray floor.

Knocking on Erik's bedroom door Antoinette listened with her ear pressed against the door. She had already checked all the other rooms he liked to shut himself away in. Many times she had asked him to reveal where his secret room was so that if he disappeared for days she would know where to look.

Erik had scoffed asking her what made her think he had some hidden room. She had informed him that she knew him and his habits pretty well. He would always need some place he could go to get away from everyone. As much as he sought to become a part of society he also shunned it as well. That she could only surmise came from spending so much of his time alone. He did not know how to mingle on a constant basis with people.

When no one answered her several attempts knocking on the door, Antoinette opened the door braving Erik's wrath if he was simply too engrossed in something to take notice of her knocking.

She gasped then quickly ran across the room to his bed. Erik lay with his legs dangling over the side. He was covered in ash. Even his face was coated with the grey substance.

Placing a hand on his chest Antoinette could feel the rattles even worse than the night before. His forehead seemed overly warm again as well. Why could the man not stay in bed for one day? It did not make him a weaker man to give in to his illness.

Surprisingly Erik had few ailments as a child. That had been a blessing as Antoinette would not have known at that time how to care for him.

Antoinette did not want a repeat of the last time she had put him to bed, but there didn't seem to be much choice. Perhaps this time Erik would be less inclined to bite everyone's head off.

Ringing down for a maid to come up so she could tell her to fetch Jacob and send up Mary, Antoinette used the time waiting to lift Erik's legs onto the bed. She struggled with his boots first. They too were covered in ash and wet black dirt.

Had Erik stood in a fireplace? She guessed that wherever he had been it was not a place the rest of the household knew of or would be welcomed to enter.

The wet dirt on his boots indicated he had been in the cellar. Antoinette had guessed that he had made himself a burrow within the dark dampness. It would be the closest thing to the opera house catacombs.

Whenever it rained the walls of the cellar dripped water. Erik had been planning on shoring up the walls with cement and having small drainage ditches dug around the boundaries of the cellar outside. He had not done so as he had been too busy wallowing in his misery.

Brielle and Lizzy both came to see what had happened now. A call from Mr. Erik's room this late meant trouble of some sort. His absence left them worried. Only this morning did he make an appearance then seemed to disappear into thin air.

Antoinette had shooed the two curious girls back downstairs instructing them to send Jacob and Mary as the other maid likely did not yet know her way about being newly hired. Lizzy and Brielle pouted as they protested they could take care of Mr. Erik perfectly well. Lizzy boldly stated she wouldn't object to giving him a nice warm sponge bath.

Mary thought Lizzy was a flirt as was Brielle. Both were interested in a man yet would not hesitate to handle Mr. Erik given the chance.

Mary would not admit her own eagerness or the bloom on her cheeks had anything to do with the poor man lying abed ill. As she and the other two had hung out the wash they had laughed and talked all the while eyeing the man on that magnificent beast.

When they spoke of him they had lowered their voices. Mary had not been quite as bold as the other two. Her thoughts and feelings she had kept to herself merely listening to the other two as she nodded her head in agreement to what they had to say.

Mary did not want to volunteer to care for her employer. If she seemed too eager someone might suspect how she felt. She herself was not quite sure what those feelings were or what they meant. Certainly they were ill-advised as well as outrageously improper.

Not knowing her past hindered her somewhat. If she had been destined for the church as her dress indicated when found, that would preclude her from having any male suitors.

It would not be in her best interest to allow any feelings for the man to develop as even if she did he would feel nothing for her. Antoinette had hinted at a love that had ended badly. If his heart was enshrouded with this love still he would not come to care for her anyway. She recalled he had called out to a Christine while ill.

Looking down at her red chapped and dry hands she laughed silently at her audacity to even think she need concern herself he might become enamored with her.

She had nothing any man would find appealing. Her hair was that of a boy. Her dress plainer and drabber than anything she could imagine. Smiling to herself, Mary knew there was not one thing he or anyone else might find attractive.

Shaking off her useless thoughts Mary followed Antoinette's instructions. She did pretty much the same as before. Jacob removed his clothing this time under dire threats of losing his job if he didn't. They all knew Antoinette's threats were only words with no real threat behind them. Jacob was far too valuable around the estate to let go without sound reason.

Soon they had Erik resting in his bed comfortably. Mary asked for some thin chicken broth she could easily spoon between his lips. A clear broth would be easy to swallow as well as nourishing.

Antoinette took the first shift of the night. She was not as foolish as Mary. She kept a discrete distance between herself and Erik. Long ago Antoinette had firmly put away any such notions of romance between her and Erik. He had too much of a hold on her now. If she let him have her heart in the way of lovers she would be lost. He would hold far too much power over her.

Mary relieved Antoinette at four o'clock. That would give Antoinette a few hours sleep before she had to be up and begin running the household.

Touching Erik's forehead he did seem cooler. She sat on the edge of the bed so she could lean in and listen to his chest and heart.

When she sat upright she could not resist brushing aside a lock of his hair that had fallen out of place. It gave him a rakish look. He could very well be one of those dashing men from one of those romance novels as Lizzy and Brielle said.

Tenderly Mary used her fingers to return the stray hair to its rightful place. Once she touched him her fingers tingled and demanded more. Since no one was to know what liberties she took Mary let her hand roam freely over his face with soft brushes of her calloused hand. She wished her hand was smoother. She chastised herself for her vanity.

She supposed along with the vanity of wanting beautiful hair the church had seen fit to take away her soft pretty hands, although looking at her hands she had to think that she and hard labor had not been strangers. True her hands had not been chapped and cracked quite as badly as they were now but they had a hard layer of old calluses on her fingers and the palms of her hands.

Since Erik (she now thought of him as Erik)seemed to be resting peacefully she would catch a few hours sleep in the chair.

She went to stand. As she went to take her hand away Erik grabbed and held on firmly. He did not grip her so that it hurt. Looking down his eyes were still closed. Maybe in his sleep he sought to keep that small bit of comfort.

When his fingers moved to thread through her own Mary's breath caught at the surge of tingles traveling from her hand all the way to the very center of her. Never had she felt anything like it. It was not an unpleasant feeling, far from it. Exhilaration best described her response to him.

Sighing she sat back down. Lifting her free hand she stroked along his cheek then around his chin to the ruined side of his face. Only a slight hesitation in her movement then she stroked a finger along the distorted flesh of his jaw line.

She thought she heard a sharp inhalation of breath. When he made no further movement she continued her exploration. She ran her finger along his ear then on to his eye which drooped a bit at the outer edge. His hair although thin on the right side was as soft as swans down.

Discounting the flawed side of his face Erik was indeed a devastatingly handsome man. Before she knew what she intended Mary found her finger tracing lightly over his lips. His bottom lip was fuller than the top. Contrary to how they looked they were soft as silk. Wondering what they would feel like pressed to her own Mary pulled her finger back as if burned. Curling her fingers into her palm she laid that wayward hand in her lap.

Directly she felt a shifting from Erik. He was moving further across the bed. Of necessity she had to lean down as he still had her hand now even more firmly clenched in his. His movement was tugging her down to the bed.

Unless she woke him there was nothing for it other than to lie down beside him. Mary, wary of repeating just this scenario and not waking in the morning had brought a small alarm clock. If she stuffed it under the pillow when it went off in the morning hopefully she would be the only one to hear it. Fishing around inside a pocket while being held prisoner was not easy but in the end the deed did get done.

Wrong or not she would be spending the night in Erik's bed once more. That should have made her uncomfortable but if she felt anything it was expectation. To lie beside his warm male body would be as close as she would ever come to how it would be to sleep with a husband. When, if she joined the church she would forgo marriage and children. Both of those things she felt she wanted desperately. To have a family would be something she thought she had always wanted.

Once she had lain down Erik proceeded to move closer to her prone body. He curled himself into her side. His head managed to come to rest on her chest just where her shoulder ended and her left breast began. His arm draped across her stomach. Once he settled she heard a deep contented sigh erupt from between his lips.

She held her breath until she heard his deep even breathing and felt the rising and falling of his chest moving in a slow rhythm. This was not proper by anyone's standards. She'd be flogged if she were still in the convent. A picture flashed into her memory of being tied between two posts with the top of her dress pulled down as a priest, not the one she knew as a friend, but another used a whip to punish her. This one had a wicked evil look about him.

This was the man who put the thin line of scars on Mary's back. She could almost feel the lash striking her back even now. She could not get the memory to come as to why she had been beaten, it was enough for her that she remembered the resulting pain. She could see vaguely figures in dark habits standing around with their heads bowed moving their lips in silent prayer. Not one of them dare interfere.

Not liking this memory at all Mary quickly refocused her mind on something more pleasant such as the man lying cozily pressed against her.

She would savor these naughty stolen moments and hoard them for the time when she remembered her old life and returned to it. At least she would have this to bring out in those moments when she felt the walls around her closing in at the church. Why she should feel as if she had no real love for the church or the sisterhood she could not find a reason just yet. Perhaps that would come in time also.

Erik had not been asleep at all. Devil that he was he had feigned sleep. He wanted Mary to caress him as she had before. She had done as he wished and more.

When she had been going to take away her gentle touch he had not been ready to relinquish it just yet. Craftily he had grabbed her hand not letting any sign show that he was fully awake and aware. A person could do things while in sleep that could be forgiven while they would not be overlooked if committed while awake.

When she had traced his face then touched his lips with one finger only, Erik had almost groaned aloud. His mind had shouted for him to take advantage by pulling her down for a hard kiss. His saner, greedier side had said no, more could be gained by simply lying there, letting her take responsibility for what happened.

She had not disappointed him. He gained one more night sleeping beside a woman as well as perhaps another night without nightmares.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven**

**Learning to Trust**

Mary awoke the next morning to the alarm clock ringing away underneath her pillow. Erik still lay with his head on her shoulder and his arm draped across her waist.

Her arm that was wrapped around his shoulder felt numb. She tried to wiggle her fingers. Pins and needles stabbed at her innocent digits.

Slowly and as quietly as she could Mary slipped out from under Erik. He grabbed at her in protest. Catching his flailing hand she laid it softly on the warm place where she had lain. A deep sigh was her reward.

Standing beside the bed she could not resist running her fingers through his hair. The strands were not quite brown nor could they be called blond. She recalled his luscious green eyes. Fire had sparked out of those green depths. They were a beautiful color even in anger.

Sighing she left the room to begin her day. Finding Antoinette she gave a report on the condition of their patient. They felt his recovery was all but assured.

Erik felt much better this morning but had no desire to let anyone know of his recovery. If they knew he would not have his angel of mercy taking care of him or giving him comfort. He'd be back to a solitary bed at night. Of course he knew this could not continue much longer or they would get suspicious.

He'd only pretend for a few more days then make a miraculous recovery. Until then he would enjoy himself immensely. He had never slept so peacefully in all his life. This line of thinking led to questions about how it would have been with Christine beside him. For once he did not continue down that road of pain and sorrow.

And so it went. Erik continued to play sick even when Antoinette and Mary declared him without fever or congestion. He claimed to have some sort of upset in his stomach, his head hurt, he could not possibly get out of bed and fend for himself.

Erik would not sleep until Mary came and sat on the edge of his bed. Maneuvering a woman into bed came easier with every night Mary came to watch over him.

He began to look forward to nighttime now. Before his bed was just another form of torture as his dreams had nightmarish qualities. Ideas of adding color were a source of occupation during the daylight hours, a means of killing time until bedtime.

The night Mary caught Erik gazing out his window humming at first made her angry but then some imp whispered in a very receptive ear if Erik were better a nurse was no longer needed, she was no longer needed. What harm could come from letting the farce go on for a short time? He seemed to want her company or certainly Antoinette would have had her ear burned from the fire of his anger. Antoinette remained unscathed.

For her part in this little deception Mary could say she did not mind giving an _ill_ man a small bit of comfort. If that man happened to be devastatingly attractive and a danger to her religious convictions well so be it.

Mary hurried through her work every day so she could take a bath before heading upstairs for her shift with Erik. She had even taken to bringing a book along so she could read aloud to him even though he was asleep. He seemed to like to hear her voice so she read her book aloud. Taking in to account that the man pretended to still suffer some malady she was not at all sure he did not play opossum.

Erik felt to go beyond the third day would be foolish. Knowing Antoinette she'd be bringing in a doctor if he did not recover soon. He had been surprised she had not done so already.

Once Erik had declared himself well enough to return to his regular routine he only saw Mary if he made the effort to find her as she worked about the house. Sticking to his resolve to distance himself from the infernal woman proved harder with every passing day.

His original punishment of taking care of those nasty beasts in the coops had turned into a pleasant chore for the blasted woman. Not that Erik felt any real irritation. He just felt the need to keep some rancor between himself and Mary. He could easily slip into the habit of needing and wanting. He'd not fall into that trap again.

As he observed her over the next few weeks Erik thought perhaps they might form a friendship of sorts. He couldn't be overly friendly as the rest of the household might get suspicious. An enquiry into her health or something similarly mundane would not bring down Antoinette's investigative skills on his head. One suspicion of hers could lead to hours of irritating interrogation from her. She was now more vigilant than ever trying to keep Erik from slipping into the madness that had gripped him before.

Much to Erik's irritation Mary seemed to become timid when in his presence. He stood behind his mirrors and watched as she talked and laughed with the others with ease. They had shared a bed yet looking at him directly suddenly became nearly impossible.

Let him come within the same room she occupied and her tongue grew silent, she would not lift her eyes above his feet when he did manage to force some comment from her other than a simple yes or no answer.

He could not help but take notice that her hands shook whenever she stood before him. After the episodes in his room while he had been ill Erik thought she had at least lost her fear of him.

Had he been such an ogre that she still felt frightened when in his presence? Erik found himself acting quite uncharacteristically to win her trust. It shouldn't matter but it did.

Erik went out of his way to be extra kind to her. He even offered her the use of his own library instead of her having to trudge to town to the less than adequate library located there.

The sparkle in her eyes had been worth losing the privacy of his library. Now Erik had a legitimate excuse to be in the same room as Mary without Antoinette or anyone else becoming suspicious of his motives.

He could sit in a chair across from Mary as they both read. If his eyes drifted more often to her than the pages of his book who was to know other than him?

The evening Lizzy and Brielle decided to take advantage of the masters offer to use his library Erik wished he could shuck the two chattering females out. They whispered as they cast glances in his direction. He had to restrain the urge to squirm in his chair. Blast them.

Regret began to seep in for his house of impropriety. It was unheard of for a man of certain wealth to share more than a cursory interest in his staff. To open a private room to them was quite shocking. To further shock the curious neighbors they heard he was in the room along with them. Three single attractive women. They whispered that perhaps more than reading took place behind the closed door of the library.

The poor man needed some comfort of a carnal nature. With his affliction it would be hard to use the usual method for procuring such service or approaching a woman to court at all. Who could blame him for taking advantage of the loose morals of servants?

Some of the local women who had seen Erik on the rare occasions Antoinette had steamrolled him into going into town had not been adverse to an admiring glance or two.

The rough natured men of the fields did not make for a romantic figure. Some of them looked worse than a pig wallowing in a stye. His face could look downright horrid and by the looks of the rest of him he'd still come out on top. That would set the more bold ones to cackling about not minding him on top.

Jacob came home sporting a black eye and an even darker mood one night after spending time in the village pub. Several hints of inappropriate behavior between his employer and the women under his roof had set Jacob off.

He had not only gotten the black eye but also an apology from the offenders. His warning of one word being touted around about the nonsense of Mr. Erik and any inappropriate behavior would earn the tale bearer more of the same he had given the three men who bore the evidence of his anger.

Jacob was quite an agile and accomplished amateur boxer. His warning they would heed. Besides, another shocking scandal was sure to crop up within the week. Small communities thrived on gossip.

Erik did not directly thank Jacob for defending his honor. He instructed Antoinette to give Jacob a couple of days off with pay. He also had her slip an extra pound into his pay envelope. It was easier for Erik to express his gratitude in this way. He was not good with people even though he had been making an effort.

As he had expected Antoinette had taken notice of his interest in Mary. He had at first protested blustering and shouting at her trying to deflect her attention away from her original query.

Antoinette had not been fooled by his tactics or swayed by his tirade. Unless he raged with fire in his eyes she knew he was only letting off steam without any real malice intended.

She continued to let him rant on and on without a word leaving her mouth. Erik stopped his stalking around the room to face his adversary. Knowing she would stand there until grass began to grow under her feet Erik at last admitted to having some interest in Mary.

He could not say what it was other than she soothed the restlessness inside him. He need only be in her presence to feel her calming effect. Erik was of the opinion that it had something to do with her religious practices. There is not greater fool than the fool who will not see what is right in front of him.

Antoinette did not for one moment believe Erik only had a casual interest in Mary. He stalked the girl throughout the day. Not in a menacing or controlling way as he had Christine but more as a man would if he cared for a woman. She would bet her last shilling Erik watched her from behind his mirrors and listened to her conversations from behind the walls.

Erik could read the disbelief in her eyes. Damn it, was it not her suggestion he try to fit in? Had she not hounded him to seek out the company of a woman?

She better than anyone knew he could not very well do things in the accepted way. Besides, his interest in Mary was only as a companion, someone he could have an intelligent discussion with.

This in no way resembled what he had felt for Christine. His only interest in Mary was as he had stated to Antoinette, purely a woman of interest who he might strike up a friendship with if she would allow such as him to be called a friend. Romantic yearnings would not raise their ugly head. Erik truly believed for the most part what he told Antoinette. If he told only a partial truth he dismissed his lapse.

He would not let himself lose control as he had with Christine. This was not the opera house and Mary did not sing. There was no Raoul de Chagny lurking in the background wooing her with his sweet words and handsome face. Of course who was to say that Mary did not have some man in her past? They could be wrong in assuming she had been headed for a life of dedication to the church and God. That thought gave him indigestion.

Knowing Antoinette would be watching him like a bird of prey now that her suspicions had some merit, Erik did not follow Mary quite as often as he had before. He kept their encounters to a minimum. He felt damn lonely after having had her companionship every evening. Erik stalked about muttering phrases such as "damn nosy woman" "nose like a bloodhound" and "a man cannot even enjoy his own home without some busybody prying into his personal affairs".

Antoinette merely smiled when she passed him in the hallway or outside in the garden. He would mumble just loud enough for her to hear then cast her a dark look all of which she ignored. It would do Erik good to have to actively pursue a woman in the normal way.

Antoinette knew he wouldn't be able to forgo Mary's company for much longer. She did not care for the sad droop to Mary's mouth at all. The sad look in her eyes was no better. Perhaps she would prod them a little. Erik was not after all a normal male. He knew almost nothing about wooing a woman. He could barely speak with one unless from behind a wall or mirror.

One way or another Antoinette would bring those two together either as simply friends or something deeper. She'd let them work out the intricacies once she had them headed in the right direction. Had she known of the couples deception during Erik's _illness_ some worry lines about her eyes could have been avoided.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight**

**Down Once More**

Never had she wanted to thump someone as she did now. Contrarily, Erik now avoided Mary. Not completely but enough for anyone with two eyes to notice the change. With each passing day Mary's droopping spirit kept pace with the droop to the discontented droop to her lips. Insane, the man lost all sanity when involved with a living woman. Give him a mannequin or drawing and he could write operas, create works of art worthy of a museum yet a breathing woman left him incapable of acting normal.

Antoinette began to think Erik was avoiding Mary just to spite her. How he could know of her plan was a mystery. Now he seemed to avoid Mary more than ever. It was sheer orneriness Antoinette felt sure that kept Erik from approaching Mary. Many times when coming upon Erik he did seem to look rather long in Mary's direction yet in the next instant angry strides took him off in a different direction, one as far from the young woman in question.

She felt time slipping away even as a golden opportunity for Erik slipped through his fingers. In her frustration Antoinette let her mind picture several ways she might use to torture Erik. She would never implement them but at least the thoughts let her rid herself of some frustration.

Time for Antoinette to go be with her daughter had come. She hated to leave while things were as yet unresolved. There was yet another stumbling block for Erik Antoinette had yet to reveal. She had requested Erik meet with her in his study downstairs. She'd not be giving him information that may set off one of his rages and be upstairs with the steep steps as her only escape. Since she did not think she could fly, Erik tossing her out a window did not appeal either.

Erik had never hurt her and she did not think he would, but it paid to be safe with Erik. He had such a volatile and unpredictable personality. When the rage overtook him sometimes, alright all of the time, he lost the ability to discern friend from foe. Even his most prized possessions were not safe from the monster he let loose on those occasions.

The dinner hour had passed some hours ago. Antoinette had been waiting for over an hour in Erik's study. When she had knocked and he had not answered she had gone in to wait. Erik often kept her waiting as his little way of showing he held power over her. She knew he did it deliberately to put her on edge. She had never been one to wait patiently for anything.

When Erik came strolling in Antoinette looked pointedly at the clock loudly ticking on the mantel. Erik ignored her. He must show that he still had some control over those around him. One could not overnight go from being an all powerful Phantom to a mere mortal with all the failings of humanity.

Erik sat down, picked up some correspondence one of the maids had left on his desk. He may not use this study very often but he would not have anyone poking about his study upstairs. His mail was deposited on this desk daily. He usually entered from the secret passageway so he could avoid the staff. As Antoinette did not care for his sudden appearances and disappearances he entered through the study door whenever they had an appointment. Antoinette sucked the life out of what little joy he could find.

He found he did not really mind using normal methods to accomplish his daily routine. Erik had been making the effort of late to use the normal means for traveling about his home. If he wished to live as a normal man he must act as such.

Tossing the letters onto the desk top Erik leaned back placing his hands on his middle with his fingers linked. He returned Antoinette's glare with what he hoped was an expressionless face. Not having been practicing his Phantom characteristics of late he thought he might be getting soft. He hadn't had a good bout of shouting for a couple of days.

Come to think of it he had not thought of Christine quite as often either. When he had it had not left him unable to function as it had before. There had been some regret along with the tightening in his chest but not the agonizing emotions he had experienced before. He wasn't sure what that meant. Later when he had time he would delve into it a little further.

Antoinette was the first to break the silence. She reminded him of her departure to be with Meg. He had calmly sat looking at her as she continued hesitantly.

She told him of her plan to place Mary in temporary charge of the household. Cook said she would not want that responsibility. Lord knows Lizzy and Brielle, while sweet and easy in nature, were too immature for that kind of responsibility.

At last she could put off informing him of Christine's impending motherhood. He would only read about it in the paper eventually if she did not tell him now.

For a few seconds Erik had sat looking back at Antoinette blankly. All of a sudden his whole being seemed to collapse into himself.

His eyes emptied of all emotion. His body seemed to deflate as his shoulders slumped. Placing his elbows on his desktop Erik leaned forward to cover his face with his shaking hands.

Erik felt numbing anguish then the pain began to build inside him. If he had thought himself to be getting over Christine this latest stab to his heart told him otherwise.

Not wanting to break down in front of Antoinette in a voice he could not keep the agony from coming out in every word, Erik asked her to leave him alone. When she sat looking uncertain he shouted angrily, coming to stand over her glaring at her furiously as the hurt he felt left him feeling physically wounded.

Not wanting to give Erik the opportunity to take out his feelings on her, Antoinette quickly left Erik alone. No sooner had the door closed when Erik roared out against this new blessing that his love and her husband would share. This was yet another taunt thrown in his face so he would know he would never be as other men were.

Erik destroyed his study before he opened the panel that led into the space behind the wall. Hurriedly he took the route that led him to the cellar. He must go to the place where he had spent so many days and nights reliving every moment he had spent with Christine.

Staggering from side to side Erik braced himself with outstretched hands to keep from falling to his knees. He did not want his breakdown to happen in this dark passage. He needed to be in the place he had felt closest to Christine.

Triggering the mechanism that would open the panel into his private sanctuary, Erik fell through the opening at last letting his grief consume him. He did not even make an effort to close the panel. His heartbroken sobs traversed the passageways to echo all throughout his home.

The eerie sounds of moaning traveled to those above in the house. Such mournful sounds seemed to come from the very structure of the house.

It was believed a ghost had come to haunt them. For what reason and who the ghost sought to haunt they did not know. Throughout the next couple of days the mournful cries would come as suddenly as they disappeared.

Antoinette had gone into every room searching for one of Erik's openings to his passageways. She could find nothing. Not wanting to miss the birth of her first grandchild Antoinette took Mary into her confidence.

As Mary listened to all Antoinette had to say her hands gripped together tightly in her lap with the emotions she felt.

Lord above, what other horrors had Erik lived through? What Antoinette told her was bad enough but they both surmised there were worse things from Erik's past than they knew.

By the time Antoinette had finished both women were crying almost to the point of sobbing. How could anyone speak of such a harsh, cruel and solitary existence let alone listen without some outpouring of tender regard? His life story would break through almost anyone's hard exterior.

Sniffling loudly they wiped their eyes and blew their noses. When they had regained a modicum of composer Antoinette asked Mary to take over for her during her absence. Erik would need watching when he came out of whatever hole he had climbed into.

Mary gave her assurance that she would leave no stone unturned in order to find Erik. Antoinette told her she could look all she liked but Erik would not be found unless he wished it. Only when he could be sure his bout of wallowing in misery could be controlled would he venture back out into the main part of the house.

The next morning Antoinette handed over her keys to Mary then hugged her wishing her luck in finding Erik even though she knew her search would come to naught.

Antoinette left with one last sad look toward the house that had been her home since she left France. She longed to see Meg again but knew also that she would miss everyone here as well as the home she had created with Erik.

Mary began her search immediately while trying to not let on what she was doing. She did not wish to embarrass Erik if she found him slightly…indisposed. The poor man had enough to contend with. Once he returned Mary vowed she would shower tender loving care upon him hoping in some small way to compensate for what the world had done to him.

Mary would keep her promise but it would not be an easy task to heal a wounded beast. Erik in his pain would snarl and strike out in an attempt to shield himself against any further blows to his heart.

Not knowing what to make of the fleeting images quickly flashing inside her mind, Mary again felt on intimate terms with suffering far greater than what she knew of Erik. One face bled into another. Twisted limbs, distorted faces, crippled men, women and children fought for a place in a memory forcefully blocking out such harsh realities.

Blood, festering wounds, skeletal frames lying in sick beds dying from lack of food left a haunted plea for mercy playing with loud discord inside her aching brain.

Taking to her bed was not an option. Suffering through her pain she used every meager remaining resource to find Erik so his needs were met without delay. How she knew he needed her was not something she questioned, she just took it at face value that he did.

Life without him now held no appeal. Whatever the future held Mary would make the most of the here and now an now the master of the house remained missing.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine**

**Healing the Heart**

Antoinette had only been gone a few days when Erik suddenly reappeared without warning. Mary had not been able to locate any entrances to Erik's hidden passages any more than Antoinette had. Her angry frustrration turned to relieved concern upon first sight of Erik. He looked even paler than usual, guant even. Recentment toward the unknown young woman driving this poor man to near death brought out every protective instinct Mary possessed. All this emotional turmoil held not familiarity for Mary. The days and nights ran one into the other as the house awaited the master's return.

Food left in Erik's room remained untouched. Everything remained just as he left them. Had days ever seemed to last interminably long before? No, these nights and days felt as if they lasted a lifetime. Worry about what that might mean was set aside as worry over her employer's return, safe and sound, took precedent over everything else.

Erik had come to the conclusion he could waste away here in this dismal remnant of a shrine or he could rejoin the living and carry on as he always had. The latter held more appeal. His stomach had ceased its rumblings a day or so ago. He felt parched from lack of water. Usually food only gained his notice as a means to sustain the body. Now his mouth watered just imagining hot steamy crepes with fresh strawberries topped with freshly whipped cream.

When he stood he swayed about like a ship in a high wind. Staggering along he unsteadily made his way back into his bedroom. He had only the energy to use the toilet and draw a glass of water. He drank thirstily. Doubt filled his mind as to whether he made it to the bed before passing out. Eating just may have to wait a little longer.

Leaning with both hands on the sink he took one of his rare looks into a mirror. He looked even more ghastly than usual. His face looked quite scruffy. He was filthy and the smell emanating from him had his own nose wrinkling in disgust. Those who created rumors about his appearance being similar to a skelatal figure reeking of death could now feel justified by their description of a man they never really saw but claimed to be able to describe in great detail with accuracy.

His hair stuck out at all angles from the constant running of his hands throw it in agitation. His clothing would never return to the state they had been in before he had sequestered himself in his hole in the wall sanctuary. Food and rest would take care of the ghastly sallow look to his flesh.

Stripping off his clothing he looked at the tub for a few seconds wondering if he could make it through a bath. His pounding head protested even one moment longer standing or sitting. He must lie down or fall to the floor in a heap.

Erik staggered to his bed where he fell down face first. He was out cold as his head hit the mattress. Days without food or water coupled with his emotional breakdown had taken its toll. After only just recovering from his illness he once again was prey to the weakness of the mind and body.

Mary had all but given up hope of finding Erik. She hoped he had not gone and done anything foolish. He had not seemed like the sort who would do anything to harm himself physically. She did not know him well at all so could only form an opinion from the little she did know. If he were a lesser man he would have ended things long ago.

His years of survival under such harsh conditions as his life had been, had honed his survival skills. Erik, for all the horridness he had experienced, was keen to live on even if he thought otherwise. No matter how bad things got his mind would not let him give in. His body took all the abuse they had given him in his younger years and he had survived. Maybe a little more hardened and cynical but he had survived.

Mary entered Erik's bedroom to change the bed linens. Carrying the pile of sheets in her arms she opened the door to find Erik sprawled out on the bed sans clothing once more. She almost turned tail and ran out of the room remembering how angry he had been the last time.

Turning to leave Mary stopped as the way he looked flashed back into her mind. Not the fact that he was unclothed so much as the lines of misery that had recently been etched more deeply in his face, at least in the portion of it she could see as he lay on his stomach with his head turned to the side.

Sighing as she turned, Mary stepped back into the room. She knew she could not leave that poor man to suffer alone. Even if that is what he would prefer it is not what he needed. Erik needed someone to reach out to him with a tender touch, someone who did not expect anything from him. She would be that person for him no matter what it cost her.

Setting her burden down on a nearby chair Mary went to the bed hurriedly tossing the coverlet over him. She had to reach across him to do that. Her breasts pressed into his back in a disturbing manner. As soon as she grabbed a handful of the cloth she scrambled backward pulling the coverlet along as she went. When she had Erik covered Mary stood looking down at him. Reaching down she grabbed his shoulder then tried to gently wrestle him onto his back. That was a lot harder than she thought it would be.

Once she could see all of his face she could see he did not look well at all. It had been several days since he had anything to eat or drink she would imagine.

At this moment, right or wrong, Mary thought if that Christine person was within her grasp she would shake the young woman senseless for what she had done to this poor wretched man.

Angel of Music indeed. What woman of seventeen being of sound mind would carry on such a belief from childhood? Mary was of the opinion Erik had fed the young girls ego as well as awakened her yearning for male companionship.

Every female over the age of five or six wanted male approval, be it from some doting father, uncle, brother or merely the boy next door. That is how females test their flirting skills while still young. It is harmless but allows a young girl to practice the art of gaining male attention without endangering herself later.

Christine had taken that game too far. She had a lot to answer for. Erik was by no means blameless but he had not had the opportunity to mix with people so he had not developed coping skills that children learn from their parents and others around them.

Solitude often bred discontent as well as a misconception of the world around the one in seclusion. Left too long separated this malcontent could turn to madness as it had temporarily for Erik. Mary could only think that madness had driven Erik too do such desperate acts of violence and destruction. He did not seem such an evil man when one got know him and see the man he hid behind that angry strike out first persona.

He loved animals and treated them all with the respect and care they deserved. If he was slightly less tolerant of people, that was to be expected. Animals accepted everyone and would even lick the hand of someone who beat them. An animal's devotion once won, was yours for life.

Underneath all his bluster Erik could be very compassionate. Had he not hired Lizzy and Brielle when no one else would? The fact of their births being on the wrong side of the blanket did not deter Erik from hiring them. Jacob as well had been a castoff. His father was a drunkard who beat his children and his wife. His brothers that had not come to their final end were headed to prison or the graveyard to join their family members.

Jacob had been an alter boy in the local church. Antoinette had told her that the priest had put in a good word for him when he had heard of the opening for a sort of Jack-of-all-trades on the estate.

Antoinette had told her Erik had spoken as if the boy was less than welcome but had hired him at a wage not seen in this part of the county. Erik for all his other faults had a sense of fairness in his makeup that he rarely let come to light.

Erik could be a better man if only he and everyone would let him do so. Mary wanted to show Erik how to find his way back to being the sort of person she knew deep down he wished to be.

With his God given talents he was not meant to shun or be shunned by the world, he was meant to shine. Such wondrous talents were a gift meant for the world to hear. To keep them hidden would almost be a sin in Mary's eyes.

She made the difficult decision not to have Jacob see Erik in this condition. Mary did not know which Erik would consider worse, that a man saw him in this condition or that a woman had seen him. She would need to tend him in any case. There would of necessity be times when she would need to do things that would require her to discard what was proper.

She hoped Erik would agree that it was better to have only one person privy to his sorry state and complete breakdown. Men in general considered any man who cried or showed great emotions other than anger, were less than a man.

Mary fetched the pan and warm water then went to work cleaning away the dirt and grime from Erik's body. She tried not to look too long where his manhood would be. It was bad enough she had to wash near to it.

She blamed the quickening of her breath on the exertion of moving Erik from side to side as she washed him front to back and top to toe.

If her eyes lingered a little too long Mary did not acknowledge her slip. When her hand slowed its movements over his flesh with the soapy washcloth that was because she wanted to be certain she did not miss any of the dirt. It was not because he looked fascinating or made the blood rush to her face or warmth pool at her core wave after wave.

Certain parts of him she wanted to study a little longer but preservation of his modesty, such as it could be in the circumstances had to be considered.

Having settled him comfortably Mary took up her vigil once more. This time she would not let him leave the bed until she herself deemed him fit to do so. The man was in for some much needed pampering.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten**

**Blissful Surrender**

Having settled Erik Mary nearly tripped down the stairs trying to hurry to the kitchen. Everyone would be assembled for afternoon tea.

She would make a tray of very sweet tea, chicken broth and perhaps some of that fresh applesauce cook had made yesterday.

Erik would need nourishment but until he could sit up and feed himself it would be a liquid diet for the time being.

Mary raced around the kitchen as she explained that Mr. Erik had returned but his earlier illness had raised its ugly head once more and he would be indisposed for a few days.

She gently but firmly refused Lizzy and Brielle's eager offers to help take care of the master of the house. Mary had felt a wave of what felt like possessiveness when the two maids offered to help. Even Jacob's offer bothered her if to a lesser degree.

As Mary went about collecting what she would need the occupants in the room exchanged knowing looks and smiles. Mary's flushed face along with the excited tone in her voice could not all be because Mr. Erik had fallen ill again.

For the last couple of weeks the talk around the table had been concerning Mary and whether or not she had feelings of an intimate nature developing for Mr. Erik. They would not dare let her know they suspected such a thing nor would they speak of it if they knew she was near. They all liked Mary far too much to embarrass her or hurt her feelings.

Having collected all she thought she might need, Mary returned to Erik's room. She set the tray on the bedside table. She alternated spooning broth and tea between Erik's lips.

Erik stirred waking to look drowsily up at her as she placed the spoon to his mouth. He sipped and swallowed gratefully. He felt far too weak to convey how much he appreciated her tender care of him yet again. It had not failed to come to his notice that someone had cleaned him as well as put on fresh nightwear.

In his present state Erik could not be bothered by the knowledge that Mary had seen him in the altogether once more. Later he may care one way or the other but for now his only concern was how wonderful it felt to have someone tend to him with such care for his welfare.

Mary continued to alternate spoonfuls of broth with spoonfuls of water and tea. When Erik had almost finished he raised his hand weakly to wave the next spoonful away.

He could not seem to focus for too long on any one thing. He felt so tired he could not keep his eyes open. The days of constant emotional upheaval combined with neglecting to eat or drink had taken their toll on him.

When Mary picked up the basin of water she had used earlier to bath reminded Erik that he felt clean allover. The pajama's he now wore instead of lying naked on the bed as he had been the last time he had been conscious, Erik knew very well he had not put them on.

He had not washed himself either. He felt clean from top to toe. There was no mistaking the implications of this state of affairs. Mary would have seen him. All of him. Not just his horrid face but his body as well. He had realized this earlier but had not seemed able to bring forth the effort to care.

Now that his faculties were returning Erik felt heat suffuse his face with both embarrassment and anger. He did not consider himself to be a shy person per se, but not since a child had there been an occasion for anyone to see him without clothing perhaps with the exception of Jacob.

Mary had been privy to his person far too many times of late. Not much of him would now be unfamiliar to her.

His anger stemmed from the fact that Mary would now be privy to all his monstrous flaws. The scars marking his back and legs would not have been possible to overlook. They were far too hideous. She had seen them before but not this close nor for such an extended time.

What must she think of him? Erik mentally berated himself for asking such a foolish question. Of course she would be repulsed and sickened as everyone else had always been who had seen him, and they had only been subjected to his face.

Mary had double the reason to think him the ugliest beast she had ever laid eyes on. Inwardly Erik cringed to think of her seeing such horridness. How she must pity him. Had not Christine kissed him out of pity? Pitiful creature of darkness that was what she had called him.

Erik wanted no ones pity. Least of all Mary's. He wanted…wanted…his fogged brain seemed not able to grasp the knowledge that floated just on the outer edges of realization.

Over the next couple of days Erik took his anger and frustration out on Mary. He knocked trays from her hands when she went to lay them across his legs. He was stubborn and taciturn at every opportunity.

The trips to the use the toilet were the worst in his opinion. This little slip of a woman took the brunt of his weight while he leaned on her weakened beyond the ability to stand on his own two feet. Erik felt total humiliation overall. He felt he had no dignity left whatsoever.

The fact that she refused to be riled by his tantrums and name calling frustrated Erik no end. The woman had the patience and forbearance of a saint he concluded. Her smiles and soft toned reassurances he pretended to deplore while waiting expectantly in his bed for her to reappear each day.

After the first day of spending the night holding his hand while attending to him, Mary had not slept in his room much to Erik's displeasure. He vacillated between wanting her comforting presence and hating his weakness for wanting it.

As the days passed he continued to display an attitude of indifference to her presence and care after coming to the conclusion the woman could not be deterred from doing as she wished. In this way he could enjoy what she had to offer while still seeming not to care whether she came or not.

The second day when Mary asked if he would care to bathe in the tub Erik had agreed that he felt up to taking a bath. When Mary would have stayed in the room to help him in and out of the bath Erik had not so politely shown her the door. He had slammed the door after shoving her out into his bedroom. The last he saw of her was Mary rubbing her arm where he had gripped it prior to removing her from his bathroom.

Later Erik felt shame when he caught sight of the fingerprints on Mary's upper arm. She did not chastise him for it or even mention his temper.

Confusion over all the new emotions he felt left him quiet during the last days of his recuperation. Erik remembered the reaction he had to Mary when she had lain with him. That he could put down to the normal reaction of a healthy virile male toward a woman pressed against him intimately.

Once his anger had cooled toward Mary some new sort of tenderness had come over him for her. It was similar to what he had felt for Christine and it scared him witless. He did not want to open himself up to that pain again. He still suffered from the damage Christine had done to his ego, heart, and soul. Another such blow he would not risk.

The expectancy he felt for each of her visits displeased him but he could do nothing to stem the excitement in him when it came time for her to come and begin her care of him.

Her thoughtfulness, gentleness, concern for his welfare and acceptance of how he looked were not things he had ever had but from a handful of people. Even those people had kept a wary eye out for his darker side to come out. Antoinette he felt cared more for him than anyone in his life ever had yet she too knew to be wary of his temper and not to draw his ire toward her.

Mary seemed to be oblivious of any danger to her person as she continued to carry on giving him the same care she had before even after his temper. He had called her unspeakable names, threatened to send her away, he had marked her arm with the evidence of his anger and still she did not desert him. She carried on as if nothing had happened.

Four days of Mary's tender care had Erik ready to leave his bed. In a way he wished he could do as before and use the ruse of continued ill health so she would need to still care for him but Erik began to feel panic as he took note of his feelings that were developing for Mary.

What he felt for Mary did not lesson how he felt for Christine. He had thought that if ever he were to find another to care for the agony he felt over Christine would begin to fade. As of today it had not. Perhaps with time he may feel less pain with his remembrances of her.

Really there was no comparison between Erik's relationship with Christine and what was developing between him and Mary. He spent hours contemplating the differences.

He at last concluded what he and Mary shared, if indeed they shared anything, was that everything between them was based on something real.

With Christine everything had been based on lies, manipulation, music, and threats. His threats to Mary were so much water off a ducks back. He could see flashes of what looked like fear and caution in Mary's eyes at times but she did not let that deter her from doing as she wished. Never once had she hesitated to offer him a helping hand.

Erik seesawed back and forth as to why Mary put up with him. He thought she felt some emotional attachment toward him, even if it was only friendship. That thought would no sooner come than to be quickly replaced by the thought that her religious teachings were what gave her the ability to face him every day while caring diligently for him.

She would feel the same sort of concern for anyone. The church would have taught her how to look upon those less fortunate in appearance. This reasoning did not coincide with the experiences he had with priests and nuns when he still lived with his mother. They had not been kind or accepting of anything about him. Not his appearance nor his quick and agile mind at such and early age. The whippings with a thick stick were what he remembered most vividly about those people who were representing God and his supposed mercy and care.

For once Erik decided he would simply let things happen. He would neither use any influence to gain further attention nor repulse any she may offer to him freely. He could only hope things did not end badly with his heart once more being trod upon by a dainty foot.

As Erik's strength had returned Mary encouraged him to sit in a chair for a little of each day. He would read or they would play chess. Mary did not know how to play so Erik had to teach her the basics. Soon it became evident Mary was a deplorable chess player. She could not grasp the intricacies of the game. Erik still enjoyed their games.

Rather than become angry over her continued failure to learn Erik found he had some hitherto unknown patience. He who would never stoop to letting a less skilled player win now found he used cunning to allow Mary to win without letting her know he had thrown the game. He presented just enough challenge that she would not know of his subterfuge.

The day Erik was allowed downstairs for the first time since he first took to his bed, his staff made certain he had everything he could possibly want or need.

Despite Erik's dour countenance he had gained the respect of those in his employ. He hired many of them when no one else would. He paid a better than average salary. They had rooms that while not luxurious were comfortable. The new luxuries he had Antoinette order had won their eternal devotion. Lizzy and Brielle began to think he walked on water.

Cook made all his favorite dishes. Little pastry treats were baked fresh daily for his afternoon tea. Erik had never had such care in his life.

He felt uncertain why they would go to so much trouble for him. He felt he had not been particularly affable toward them. Indeed at times he had been quite horrid in his estimation, always stalking about with a dark cloud hanging over his head. His angry outbursts would win no favor with any sane person.

Erik demanded they keep to themselves rather than mix with the people from the village. Since he held the belief no one would ever find anything worthy in him of respect or the offer of true caring he could not comprehend that they cared for him as they made the extra effort to show him their regard.

As confused as Erik was, he found this new episode in his life quite to his liking. It was pleasant to exchange polite words with those who served him rather than simply accept their servitude in silence.

Erik found Jacob especially pleasant and well informed about many subjects despite having never attended any formal schooling.

When Erik learned Jacob loved to read Erik opened his library to Jacob. Of course Jacob protested but Erik told him books were meant to be enjoyed by everyone not just a select few. To waste such prose would almost be sacrileges. There were so many books in his library it would be unlikely they would want the same title at the same time. Jacob graciously accepted Erik's offer.

Everyone marveled that a gentleman of Erik's standing would open up such private rooms to the staff. They could think of not one of their peers who had such privileges.

Erik and Jacob began to discuss the many topics Jacob read about. Mary stood behind the scenes during this time pleased to see Erik grow into a much more confident and accepting person. As hard as Mary tried she could not stop the growing love she felt for this man. For love is what filled her heart with such joy simply being in the same room as Erik.

If her memory ever returned Mary did not know if she could return to the church. She did not feel as if that had been what she wanted. Not knowing of her past it was hard to form any real opinions. All she could rely on was her instincts.

Leaving Erik would break her heart, this she knew with certainty. He had embedded himself deeply within her soul. Erik had shown her nothing that normally would attract a person toward another. In fact he had done everything in his power to push her away it seemed.

Other than their days when they played chess or discussed household concerns they did not come into contact as often as Mary would like. She supposed it was for the best if she would be leaving someday and there was that woman, Christine Daaé who Antoinette had told her he had loved with an obsessive passion.

Mary found it hard to believe anyone would overlook Erik in favor of another man. It was true he had not been as normal men were. He did not behave in the same way as society expected men to act. Erik had committed all those crimes just to survive. It hurt Mary to think that Erik so devalued himself he thought the only way to win a woman was to lie, cheat and manipulate.

Erik had so much more than just a pleasing face or angelic voice. His musical talent aside Erik had proven himself to be above average in intelligence.

He could create such wonderful things. Mary had not missed all those drawings of a beautiful young woman that Erik had hidden away in his dresser drawer.

It hurt somewhat to see the love and painstaking detail in every picture. They looked so lifelike Mary could believe the young woman would pop off the page to speak to her.

Erik had drawn other things as well. Two other women graced several pages. One she recognized as Antoinette as a younger woman and a girl perhaps the same age as Christine. This girl Mary believed was Meg Giry, Antoinette's daughter as she looked similar to her.

At the bottom of the pile Erik had drawn Mary. Not posed attractively or drawn looking her best. The image Erik had chosen to commemorate to a page for posterity had been as she must have looked when he first found her.

He had drawn her lying on the sand with the waves covering her feet. Erik had at least drawn her lying on her back. When she had first looked at it she had been a little hurt that he had not drawn her in some better pose than lying unconscious on a sandy beach.

Her eyes were closed. Erik had given her a look of serenity. If she did not know what had happened to the woman in the picture she would think she had simply fallen asleep and the tide had begun to come in.

When she had looked closer she could see Erik had whimsically drawn a mermaid's body from the waist down. The torn fabric of her habit had scales peeking out as well as the customary flippers and tail.

Mary wasn't quite sure if she liked to be equated with a creature known in fairytales to lure men into the sea, never to return again.

Erik and Jacob continued to build a solid friendship. Erik had never had a friend so at first he was clueless what their relationship was. They were more than employer employee yet not quite family either.

Searching for a word to define how he saw Jacob Erik finally hit upon the word friend. He savored the word as well as its implications as it applied to him.

Having satisfied himself with pigeonholing Jacob's role Erik then set about finding what exactly his relationship was with Mary and if he wanted it to develop further.

Erik returned to his habit of listening behind the walls and looking out of his two-way mirrors. He did not feel uncomfortable invading everyone's privacy as this method had been used by him almost all the years he lived under the opera house.

He particularly watched Mary and listened in on her conversations. Although he knew her to be slated for the church Erik could not help but feel it would be a tragic waste for such a person as Mary to forgo having a husband and children. The church might argue that they needed just such caring people as Mary to carry on their good works.

As Erik watched Mary one evening as she slept in a chair in front of the library fireplace with a book in her lap he felt an overwhelming urge to put this new image of her down on paper. Hurrying to his study he gathered his portfolio and several bits of the charred remains in the fireplace.

Erik slipped quietly into the library taking a seat across from Mary. She always fell asleep after only a few minutes reading. She worked so hard during the day. Erik had meant to speak to her about all the jobs he had assigned to her when she first came to live here. At that time it had been a source of punishment. Now it only served to make Erik ashamed of himself for foisting so many tasks on her out of spite.

Anyone looking at Erik's finished drawing would know that the artist felt something more than mere artistic observance for his subject.

Emotions churned inside Erik with every line he placed on the paper. By the time he had finished all Erik wanted to do was grab Mary up into his arms. He had to resist such urges as if he gave into them he would lose Mary just as he had lost Christine.

It felt strange to think of Christine and not experience those old debilitating emotions that used to overwhelm him with every thought of her. It had been some time since he had gone to the cliff and looked into the churning waters below contemplating stepping off into nothingness. Erik estimated it had been since the day he found Mary. So much of his life had been changing for the better since the day of her arrival.

Of course he had suffered his breakdown but with Mary's help he had come through it feeling better about himself. She and his other staff members made him feel less lonely. Before Erik had not taken notice of all the little extras everyone did for his comfort.

Cook made all those special pastries he liked without him needing to ask. The maids, Lizzy and Brielle brought him tea just when he was in need of refreshment no matter what time of day or night. They always seemed to know just when to bring it. It was never any set time but always during those long nights of composing.

Jacob did a hundred and one things that were not strictly what he was paid to do. Erik learned he did them because Jacob respected Erik and appreciated him for employing a man who others shunned because of his family.

Mary went about her chores without complaint. She had taken care of him twice when he had given into his grief over losing Christine.

It bothered him that she had seen every inch of him without clothing as well as touched all those places with her hands. Along with the irritation had come excitement to think of her hands roaming over him in that way. Now he wished he had been conscious during those times.

Erik made an extra effort to speak kindly to everyone and place a tight control on his anger when something displeased him. It felt gratifying that there was little he found to irritate him these days.

Since Mary did not seek him out anymore he took to showing up in places he knew she would be and at the precise time she would be there.

He had even been so bold as to ask her to join him for a ride and picnic on the beach. He had tried to ignore the knowing looks his request for a picnic basket for two had garnered from everyone around the table in the kitchen. Erik had chosen a time he knew Mary would not be joining those gathered around the table for tea.

Erik couldn't bring himself to care overly much about whether or not his employees thought he had certain interests in Mary or not. If anything came of it they would know soon enough.

Exactly when Erik had decided to pursue his fascination with Mary he couldn't pinpoint the exact moment. It had sort of crept up on him over time.

He did not feel the same desperate need to possess Mary that he had felt for Christine. Of course there was not a suitor chomping at the bit to challenge Erik for Mary's affection unless one counted God as a rival.

Erik tried not to obsess about what would happen if Mary regained her memory and decided to return to the church to take her vows. Once again he would be heartbroken but he could at least cope with it better this time. Her rejection hopefully when and if it came would only be because of her religious beliefs and not because of his abhorrent face.

It was one thing to tolerate his face while caring for him it would be another to kiss his lips knowing what was under the mask.

This time Erik would take things slowly and let the relationship develop normally. He did not know how to court a woman but he was willing to give his best effort to win Mary for he found himself wanting her more and more with every passing day.

His attraction to Mary was no less intent than his lust for Christine had been. What he felt for Mary left him confused how to define all the different aspects. He and Christine had not had a face to face relationship until the disastrous last few months at the opera house.

Nothing in their relationship had been normal or healthy for either of them. Erik could take responsibility for keeping Christine a child in mind by letting her continue to believe him to be an angel long past the time when childish beliefs were appropriate.

Mary on the other hand knew exactly what he was. He had no doubt Antoinette would have enlightened her after his episodes of anger against Mary.

The day of their picnic Erik received word that Meg had given birth to a healthy boy. Mother and son were fine. Antoinette would be staying on to help her daughter as well as Christine when the time came.

Erik would not let the mentioning of Christine's condition spoil his day. He and Mary would have a carefree few hours with nothing to hinder their enjoyment.

If Erik cried later in the privacy of his room no one would be the wiser. Erik was done displaying his torments publicly. From now on any pain would be endured privately. He had developed a sense of pride in how others perceived him and wanted to continue to earn everyone's best regards. Weaknesses would no longer be tolerated in open displays for the entire world to see.

As Erik thought on the matter he concluded he did not really feel all that saddened or disheartened anymore. Something had changed in him. Someone had changed him, Mary, his Angel From the Sea.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Life is dishing out some nasty things for me so naturally I turn to the love of my life, Erik. He fills in the gaps of my broken life. For now he is all I need to keep going on. He doesn't judge me or hurt me. In my world he is the perfect companion, he does what I tell him to...sometimes.**

**Chapter Eleven**

**Days of Splendor**

Contrary to what Erik expected, the following days with Mary were quite enjoyable. They could not spend all day everyday together as it would not be seemly. Sneaking about brought back those days when his life was lived around stolen moments with Christine. How different things were now. Now the woman he longed to be near felt the same longing toward him. How very different things were indeed.

Wanting to shout to the world about his mermaid from the sea he knew secrets must be kept. Erik cared little for his own sake but for Mary he would not invite gossip. It was already too late to stop the speculation among his staff as to what his intentions were toward Mary. Beyond the estate gossipping tongues likely had the poor waif set upon by the evil monster paying for the poor childs services. Did he take those services beyond what is acceptable? Small rural areas were no different than those densely populated meccas of culture all over the world, gossip was much like food or a drug, sorely needed by those addicted and gladly passed on by those in possession of everyone's secrets.

Everyone had to be curious as to why the Lord of the Manor would pay so much personal attention to a mere maid. The difference in this case was that all of his staff respected Mary far too much to let any petty jealousy or unwisely spoken words pass beyond the perimeter of the estate. Erik often speculated if they knew of his past and were concerned whether his wrath may well fall upon them if they stepped over the boundaries he cleaarly marked from the beginning.

Private matters might be discussed and speculated on in private but they would not go beyond those under Erik's roof. Erik made sure of this as he listened shamelessly throughout the day to personal conversations as well as the lively discussions among the staff at the kitchen table during lunch and teatime.

At first Erik had been shy of asking Mary to join him for anything but taking his courage in his hands Erik found that once he began to speak to her Mary had some magic that eased his mind and soothed that restless inner being into a normal calm person.

He found her easy to speak to as well as inquisitive and eager to learn. They could speak intelligently of music, art and general subjects. Mary knew several languages but could not remember why or how she came to know them.

She knew some nondescript dialects from cultures many would never encounter. Erik concluded Mary had most likely done some missionary work. Interesting as that aspect was he worried about her exposure to diseases as yet without a cure or treatment.

Mary continued to play chess with him, not very well but well enough to give Erik a good game. When Erik taught her several moves that led to her victory in several games she praised her teacher so much he blushed even as his chest puffed out from the unexpected praise. A simple accomplishment to be sure, how much greater the reward to have others praise his life's work, his precious music.

Not many had found anything worthy that Erik could pass on. It was not that Erik didn't have knowledge; it was the fact that his face kept others from wanting to find out what he had to offer beyond his disfigurement.

When Erik played for Mary on the piano she found herself unable to express how profoundly moved she was other than to stammer out disjointed words as tears fell down her cheeks in a torrent of emotional display.

Not knowing how else to explain what he made her feel Mary had gone to him and hugged him with her arms around his neck. She had placed a soft kiss upon his check then jerked back with an apologetic exclamation.

Erik had stopped her from saying more. He did not wish her to take away the wonderful feeling of her lips on his cheek.

Later that evening as he readied himself for bed Erik had touched his cheek in wonder. Christine's kisses had unleashed something tender and passionate inside him that had allowed him to think of her wants and needs above his own. Mary's had left him feeling so many unexplainable, confusing emotions, none of which lead to her release.

Mary made Erik feel every inch a man. His body reacted to her nearness or even when he merely thought of her he felt those familiar stirrings Christine had reawakened in him after he had buried them during those years of his occupation in the opera house when he had no one to relieve those urges other than himself.

All his passions had been poured into his music. When Christine had come of an age to begin attracting the opposite sex, that had been the beginning of the downward spiral for Erik.

Christine had brought all those deeply buried urges and needs to the surface. After years of celibacy Erik had been all too ready to become her lover. Her interest had been elsewhere. Raoul had come along rocking the boat and winning her affections.

Mary filled any gaps in his heart that Christine had left open and bleeding. No longer did he go out into the night finding himself poised on the cliff challenging nature to end his existence. The villagers no longer heard those ghostly cries of anguish floating through the night. His angel from the sea gave new meaning to his once lonely life.

He hesitated taking their relationship further in fear of losing all if she did not return his feelings. She would leave and he would be alone once more. Better to have a little companionship rather than to risk losing everything by making some declaration of his newly awakened feelings or the beginnings of what might be love.

Erik managed to keep to his resolve until the day they picnicked beside the little brook that flowed through his property.

At first the day had started as all their other picnics had. They ate, spoke of their day, admired the beauty around them then lay down to look up at the sky simply enjoying one another's company.

After a few minutes Erik had sat up then looked downward at Mary. He had found her eyes locked with his. Erik felt himself drowning in the blue of her eyes. Without any thought in his head to do so he lowered his head to place his lips on hers.

Not being experienced but with all the manly emotions churning within him Erik instinctively opened his mouth to run his tongue along Mary's own sweet lips.

He had never initiated intimacies of this nature before. He had of course caressed Christine in those few stolen moments but nothing substantial.

When Erik heard Mary moan he jerked back as if burned. He began to apologize thinking he had disgusted her or hurt her in some way. He could not bear losing her. If friendship was all she would allow him it would have to be enough.

Mary had been shocked by Erik's possession of her lips. He had taken her by surprise but he had not offended her in any way, quite the opposite in fact. She had not been able to hold back that moan once he had ran his tongue along her lips. Where his tongue had touched had seemed to leave a warm trail behind.

The warmth in her belly was not something she had ever experienced before to this degree. A pleasant pooling of warmth when he came within touching distance of her and the time she had hugged and kissed his cheek after he had played his piano had left her with a pleasant warm glow, not this slow burning all over that spiraled upward with every second his lips had remained on hers.

When she had felt the tingles between her thighs she could not repress the groan of pleasure. Now Mary felt deprived of his warmth. Reaching out she put her hand behind his head and brought him down to her waiting lips. This time she would allow no misunderstandings. Mary opened her own mouth to welcome his questing tongue.

Erik let out a groan of his own as he moved his body to lie across the top half of hers. Mary buried her fingers in Erik's silky hair.

Raising a shaking hand Erik placed it alongside Mary's cheek. He let his fingers glide along her soft skin. He did not stop at her chin but kept on going. He felt her swallow as his fingers trailed along her slender neck.

Erik did not hesitate until he felt the cloth of her dress with his fingertips. He fingered a button wondering if he dared to go further.

Mary's own hand came up and deftly she undid several buttons as well as untying her shift underneath. She did not have a corset on.

Erik had discovered since leaving the opera house that all women did not wear them on a daily basis. The women of lower stations in life did not wear them as the garment hindered movement to do their many chores as well as being an added expense many could not afford.

He had speculated who among his staff did or did not wear them but would never stoop to watching a woman disrobe out of curiosity.

Erik inhaled deeply as he felt Mary take his hand and place it on her bared chest. If he parted the material just a bit he would have a good view of her burgeoning bosoms.

Mary arched her back in invitation. He watched her face closely. She had her eyes closed. He could feel the quick inhales and exhales of her breath brushing a seductive little breeze across his face. Erik's own breathing had accelerated as he had made progress down Mary's throat with his fingers then his lips.

As he lowered his head to move aside the material of her dress with his questing lips Erik could only hope lightning did not suddenly come down striking him dead or his body did not give out having a heart attack due to so many new experiences with a woman.

He nuzzled this newly bared flesh with his lips and tongue. When his tongue scrapped across a pebbled nipple Mary groaned as she pulled his head down pressing him harder into her mound of flesh.

In his excitement Erik bit down softly. When she groaned even louder and moved with a jerk upward for a brief instant doubt crept in then quickly disappeared as a wild woman came loose beneath him. what a revelation he found upon seeing a contorted yet beautiful face so close to his own. This is what pleasure looked like in its rawest terms.

Returning to his intimate exploration of Mary's succulent breasts Erik lost all sense of time or even where he was at the moment. His full concentration centered on the woman beneath him and the pleasure he felt with each new portion of her that was revealed for his exploration.

With only a fleeting thought Erik realized Mary had begun to release the buttons of his shirt. He could be thankful now he had forgone wearing all the trappings of a gentleman.

When her fingers first touched the skin of his chest Erik nearly shot off the ground at the unfamiliar touch. Not that it was not pleasant, indeed he craved even more of her touch, what had given him such a jolt had been the unexpected soft touch of her hands on his bared flesh.

When he had been ill she and Antoinette both had touched him in this manner but he had not been conscious for most of it. At least not the skin to skin touches on his chest and stomach that Mary now gave to him.

Mary marveled how a man could feel so rock solid yet their skin felt so soft and smooth. She felt the little prickles as the hair of his chest tickled the palms of her hands.

She wanted to place her lips on his skin to taste him but hesitated as she did not wish to seem too bold. Considering Erik had his face buried in Mary's own chest feasting on her attributes with his tongue and lips she thought it might not be any bolder than Erik's own exploration of her.

Willing to risk all Mary gently nudged Erik upward. Silencing all those voices threatening fire and brimstone Mary took what in her heart she craved most of all at this moment, to be as close to Erik as possible. The first swipe of her tongue caused violent tremors to race through Erik. His whispered words begging for more of the same had Mary emboldened to use her tongue to taste more of Erik as he arched backward giving her access to more of his flesh.

Mary discovered that Erik's flesh responded to her caresses much as hers had responded to his. His nipples pebbled under her tongue. He groaned just as she had when Mary took him into her mouth.

With unconscious movements Mary and Erik strained toward each other pressing their bodies together. Erik moved his body until he felt the mound of Mary's womanhood beneath his own hardened manhood.

He could not control the thrusting of his hips against hers. In unison they groaned and strained toward each other even more. Now they had gone beyond the need for mere touch into the realm of possession and the exchange of passionate expressions by intimate actions.

Moving against one another in frenzied movements they seemed to be lost in a sensual haze. Mary felt Erik's hand grappling with the material at the waist of her borrowed trousers.

A voice inside her head urged Mary to stop this now while another encouraged her to seek to ease the want of her flesh. Mary wanted desperately to ignore that inner voice telling her to call a halt to further intimacies.

Those inner voices waged a war even as she responded to Erik's caresses. Some inner knowledge that this might not be the appropriate time to consummate any sort of relationship between them had Mary's mind clearing of the sensual fog Erik had caused with his lovemaking.

Thoughts of what might come when she remembered who she was kept Mary from giving in wholeheartedly to Erik. Questions began to plague her. What if she had a husband or beau? It did not seem likely, not knowing anything from her past placed restrictions on how she conducted herself. Did the church own her? She may have simply been visiting the convent and borrowed clothing.

Then again what if her memory returned and she found she did indeed wish to devote herself to serving others? After sharing such intimacies it would be bound to hurt both of them to separate afterward, especially Erik with his past history.

That brought thoughts of Erik and this other woman, Christine. What if he were not completely over her? Would he eventually cast Mary aside when he regained control of his faculties when his desires had been sated?

There were far too many questions with no answers. Mary did not want to completely sever whatever she and Erik had at the moment. She must make him understand how she felt.

"Erik please stop. I can't." Mary had placed her hand over Erik's to stay any further removal of her clothing.

At first Erik could not comprehend what Mary said. As the words took on meaning Erik felt the old rejections overwhelming him.

God, what had made him think she would want his monstrous touch? He must have imagined her encouragement with his desire inflamed mind. He had convinced himself she wanted him.

Erik began to beg her forgiveness as well as beg her not to think too badly of him. If all he could have was her friendship that would be enough. He didn't want to lose her completely he pleaded for a small scrap of kindness.

Mary stopped Erik from debasing himself further with softly spoken words he thought never to hear from a woman. "Erik it is not that I do not want you. Believe me I do. It would have been so easy for me to let you go further and I would have reveled in your possession. What caused my hesitation is not knowing what is in my past," Mary pleaded for his understanding.

"Erik, I have feelings for you. I will not make a complete declaration until I know I am free to do so. I do not feel as if there is any reason for us not to be together but I cannot be sure. Until I can be positive of no past entanglements let us continue to get to know one another. We know so little about one another."

As Erik went to push himself up Mary gently staid his movements by wrapping her fingers around his upper arm as she said, "I do not mean we must forego all contact. I do think I have become addicted to your kisses. Would you mind if we at least kissed now and then?"

Erik could not believe the words he had just heard. From feeling totally rejected to being requested to give his kisses to her had his heart pounding out a joyous rhythm.

Lowering himself down to Mary Erik proceeded to kiss her passionately. If a kiss was all he would have then by God it would be as passionate as his inexperience could make it.

Erik knew he had succeeded in bringing Mary to the brink once more as she groaned and wound her arms around his neck tightly. Erik's frail ego exalted in Mary's passionate display upon his lips with her own. He was so far gone he did not even think of those kisses Christine had given him.

Adhering to Mary's request Erik did not take things beyond their passionate kisses. He savored each one as if Mary were a rare delicacy. She did much the same as Erik did. She placed every caress into a special place where it could be brought out later for enjoyment when she lay in her bed alone.

When Erik felt he could not stand another moment without taking Mary fully, he separated from her to regain control. With Mary caressing his back the whole time he tried to bring his heart rate and breathing under control, he found it to be no easy task.

Her lips on his back did not help either. Even with his shirt between her lips and the bare skin of his back Erik still felt the scorching of her lips upon him. He grabbed her hands as they snaked around his waist. Damnation the woman would not be making it easy to keep his promise.

Firmly Erik removed himself from Mary completely by getting up and standing several feet away. Mary got up from the blanket as well. She took the several steps needed to bring herself right up against Erik.

It seemed that when Erik had given his promise to keep things to the exchange of kisses only it had freed Mary of any responsibility thus allowing her to play a dangerous game. She felt free to kiss or caress Erik whenever the whim to do so came over her.

Erik growled low in his throat as he told Mary his restraint would only go so far. He was a man after all and men were notorious for seeking their pleasure wherever they could.

She continued to nibble at Erik's lips as she assured him she trusted him completely. As Mary spoke the words it occurred to her that she spoke the truth. She did have faith in Erik. For whatever reason Erik had her complete trust.

Over the next few weeks Mary tested Erik's resolve over and over, not that he minded really. It was frustrating but he at least knew Mary shared in his frustrations. It was not disgust or fear of him that kept her from welcoming him as her lover. There were times when it had been Erik who had to physically remove himself from Mary before things went too far.

The glazed look in Mary's eyes as she pouted at him for not continuing enforced within Erik that he was not a complete monster. Someone found him attractive.

Antoinette had often told Erik he was not as repulsive as he thought himself to be. He had never really believed her. Christine's betrayal of him as well as her affections for Raoul had left him feeling as if no one would ever be able to look upon him with a lover's eyes.

Whenever he caught Mary looking at him Erik could have no doubt what she felt for him. The fierce look of passion in her eyes he knew would only be a reflection of what would be shining from his own eyes.

As their romance progressed, for that is what it was, Erik felt an overwhelming urge to risk it all with a declaration of love. Erik knew he loved Mary with every fiber of his being. He no longer dwelled upon Christine or what she had meant to him. He still had some residual feelings for her and perhaps always would but he did not feel that crushing weight now when he thought of Christine. Now all he felt was a pleasant warmth for having someone who he had shared his music and someone he had taught to use her talents through training her voice.

One evening, after one of their chess games, Erik could not let Mary go until he had made some effort to express how he felt. He held on to Mary's arm when she would have left him after only a cursory little peck on the cheek. Mary deemed it safe only for quick demonstrations of affection while within the walls of the house.

Erik knew that everyone was aware of his and Mary's newly formed relationship but he could not tell her that unless he would be willing to disclose all those places he had made especially so he could spy on anyone who entered his home.

As Mary gazed at him trustingly Erik simply blurted out the words, "Mary I love you." There. He had said it. He had said the words out loud that had been on the tip of his tongue for quite a while now. He saw Mary's eyes widen then a brilliant smile cross her lips just seconds before she launched herself into his arms.

Erik laughed as he felt Mary kissing him randomly all over his face and neck. She declared that she loved him too and had wanted to speak of her own feelings but hesitated as that might be too forward and of course there still remained her lack of memory.

When Erik would have asked what would happen when Mary recovered her memory she told him nothing could separate her from him short of an act of God. She no longer felt a need to join the church if indeed she had ever felt such an urge. Mary did not feel as if her devotion ran that deeply.

Reluctantly Erik and Mary had parted. She had kissed him quickly on the cheek one last time before leaving the room to seek her own bedroom. She had been surprised to find Lizzy and Brielle had snuck up the back stairway and were sitting on the floor by her door.

Lizzy had a pot of warm tea and Brielle had a plate of fresh cookies they had baked that morning. When Mary invited them in she was amused as Lizzy pulled out a sugar bowl and creamer pitcher from her voluminous dressing gown pockets. Mary had to wonder how Lizzy had managed to carry the creamer in her pocket without spilling a drop. Something told Mary that neither girl was a stranger to late night clandestine meetings.

Mary quickly donned her own nightgown then joined the other two as they sat crossed legged on her bed. As soon as Mary seemed to be settled Lizzy and Brielle shot questions at her about what was happening with Mr. Erik and her. They knew what was what so don't even try to dissemble.

Dipping her head shyly Mary told them that she and Mr. Erik were in love. She did not give them a blow by blow account of all that had transpired between them. Mary felt there really wasn't any need for it anyway as both women were far more experienced than she herself was.

Lizzy would not let Mary get away without some comments on how Mr. Erik kissed as well as other things he did well. Mary blushed furiously but would not let it be said that Erik lacked in any way. When Lizzy and Brielle were forthcoming about their own liaisons, Mary braved their inquisitive stares as best she could while relaying a little of how it felt to have Erik's soft warm lips on her own.

Mary felt quite flushed after her very in-depth description of Erik's prowess as far as kissing and a little cuddling were concerned. The three women stared wide-eyed at one another before grinning knowingly.

Lizzy and Brielle congratulated Mary on winning the most attractive man around. They had just known he was a sensual beast under all those dour dark scowls he showed them all the time.

Upon seeing how impressed the two were with Erik, Mary could not help but build him up in their eyes. She laid it on as they scooted in closer so as not to miss one single word. By the time Mary finished they were fanning themselves and all but drooling. Hoping she had not gone overboard Mary waved them off toward their own rooms after an hour of chatting.

Erik found it rather strange the looks he got from the women in the household. He felt even stranger when the women he passed on the street or met in the shops gave him the oddest looks. Not ones denoting fear, disgust or any other look Erik could say he usually got from men and women especially.

The whispered conversations made him uncomfortable and he had to restrain himself from checking to see if his mask was on correctly or if he had a hole in his trousers.

Erik's numerous visits to town were enough to cause comment. Mary sitting at the same table as he did sipping coffee or tea in the café elicited many commentaries from the village gossip mongers. Truthfully everyone was agog to see the mysterious man who owned one of the county's finest estates in town whether alone or with the young lady.

He had refused all invitations to attend any social gatherings. When he had come into any of the shops he had kept the hood of his cloak over his head. They knew of course he had some facial disfigurement but he went beyond what they thought reasonable trying to keep his privacy. Privacy was one thing but being a hermit was quite another.

Under pressure from Mary Erik began leaving his heavy cloak at home. He would never agree to removing his mask and she did not ask that of him.

To Erik's amazement no one paid more than a cursory first look of curiosity when he went to town that first time without his cloak.

When he listened in to some of those not so secretive comments the ladies were whispering to one another, he got quite a shock. They were not speaking of him in terms of how horrid he must be under the mask, but spoke more of the parts they could see. What they had to say did make him wonder if he heard correctly or not. Looking into Mary's red face he had to believe he did hear what he thought. She had been giving some of those young ladies a look Erik would not wish trained upon him.

Antoinette would be quite surprised to see how much Erik had grown in the months she had been away. There was now a man where there had once been a frightened, angry, and lonely outcast. Erik began to think being a part of the world would not be so bad.

Encouraged by Mary he had begun to consider offering a few pieces of his music for sale. He had even thought he might like to pen a book based upon his own miserable life. One which would take place on an English estate that abutted the wild tumultuous ocean. Of course there must be a sea nymph who came to save the dark dour hero. Erik was of the opinion he could do a story of this type justice.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter Twelve**

**Returning Home**

Restless energy kept Antoinette up long after everyone in the house fell into deep sleep. Pacing from room to room with no clear purpose drew Meg's attention after a few days recooperation. Her mother worried about her charge, not a duaghter and not a son, at least not one born of her womb. The time had come for mother and daughter to say goodbye once more. Her other children needed their mother's steadying influence, one more than the other, or perhaps not. Christine, although heavy with child, waited on hand and foot by an adoring husband, still found something missing in her nearly perfect life. The elder Giry would set them all on the correct path.

Antoinette had stayed with Meg until she could manage on her own. She had many servants to cater to her needs. Meg used her sweet persuasive nature to sway her mother's decision. A mother could only teach a child so much. Meg felt confident she could handle things on her own. Marriage and motherhood brought with it some sensibility. Antoinette had raised her to be self-sufficient when the need arose.

Having left Meg's, Antoinette went straight to Christine's and Raoul's estate. They welcomed her charmingly. Christine was glowing. Raoul leapt to satisfy every request Christine made of him. Ib the surface Christine appeared happy and yet on occassion there came a faraway look in her eyes that ofter came with a sad tilt to her lips.

It did not take Antoinette long to see Raoul adored Christine and would do anything to make her happy. If he spoiled her a little too much in time that would lesson, especially now with a child on the way.

Christine had only waited until Antoinette had been shown to her room to begin to question her about Erik or as Christine continued to call him, her Angel of Music.

"Maman how is he? I have been so worried about him. Meg assured me he was safe and doing well as could be expected, whatever that means."

"Well at least you waited long enough for me to close the door behind me before seeking to question me. _**Erik **_my dear Christine is doing well. He is recovering slowly. It was to be expected that only time and distance would heal his heart. When I left he had made significant progress thanks in no small part to Mary."

An unfamiliar prick in Christine's chest made her sit up straighter to look enquiringly at Antoinette. The pang that had shot inexplicably through her felt like jealousy. Christine chastised herself for being silly. She had no reason to feel jealous of her angel or rather Erik. She had let him go and chosen Raoul.

Any lingering stirrings she felt were just the remainder of a girl's first stirrings of passion for an adult male. Christine could not deny to herself that she had felt a tremendous attraction to the man who had taken her to his home below the opera house and then joined her on stage to perform his opera.

The man on stage that night had lulled her into a passion filled haze. She had almost forgotten her purpose. She hoped Raoul did not know and she would never tell anyone just how close she had been to succumbing to Erik's voice and seductive caresses.

If he had not used Raoul's own words to beg her to allow him to stay with her Christine honestly thought she might have done things differently. Whether or not it would have been the right thing she could not say with any certainty. Erik could be quite seductive when he chose.

What she felt for Raoul and her tutor and angel for all those years were very different emotions. She felt passion for Raoul it was just not the desperate yearnings of her first youthful longings. That night when Erik had brought her below to his home, Christine had been so confused by all the emotions she had felt.

She had been an innocent in the sense that she had not yet been with a man but knew what those feelings meant. She had felt them with Raoul as well.

She and Raoul had consummated their relationship just after she had left the opera house to escape Erik that first time. She had returned for the gala just after Christmas. That was when her Angel had appeared demanding they perform his opera and she be placed as the lead.

It had broken her heart to see the pain in his face when he had caught sight of Raoul's engagement ring on the chain around her neck.

When their eyes had met it seemed as if he could read her mind and knew she and Raoul had been intimate before exchanging their marital vows. He had torn the chain from her neck claiming her chains were still his. In a way that might still be true. Her Angel did still hold a piece of her heart. Not so much that she would leave Raoul or betray him, at least she did not think so.

With Raoul things were very passionate but she did not feel as if every time they made love it would be the last. With her angel, Erik, there would have been nothing she could count on. He had been so angry a lot of the time. He would curse and shout angrily when she made silly mistakes.

If she had not been so gullible Christine felt that his actions would have clued her in that he was not any angel at all. She had needed desperately to believe so she had let him manipulate her all those years. Now that she had been deprived of his presence and influence for a considerable time she felt all kinds of a fool to have believed him to be some angel her father had sent to her.

She had needed to believe and so she had. Her problem had been she had carried on the belief long after most people would have done so. As an adult woman she should have let go of her childish beliefs.

In the beginning Christine had been young enough that it was easy for Erik to convince her that he had been sent to her from her dead father as he had promised. Later she had wanted to believe even when her mind told her he was not an angel at all.

Antoinette told Christine of Erik's life. She left out those times when he had all but lost all sense of himself as he dwelled in a world only real in his mind. She did not want to lesson Erik in Christine's eyes in that way. He deserved a little pride even if he would not know of it.

When Christine's time came to deliver her child Antoinette sat by her bedside holding her hand. Raoul would not hear of waiting in some room by himself while his wife struggled to bring his child into the world.

Perhaps it would have been better for him to have not been present when in the throws of her pain Christine had called out for her Angel of Music. She had begged and pleaded for him. In her delirium she did not realize her angel was across the ocean in England.

Poor Raoul stood helplessly by as his wife called out for another man to be by her side during what should have been one of Raoul and Christine's most precious moments.

Antoinette did not chastise Christine until a few days later. Christine broke down confessing she had feelings for Erik, feelings that confused her.

After two weeks of Christine bursting into tears at the drop of a hat as well as being downright cruel to Raoul Antoinette had just about had enough. Antoinette knew some of Christine's emotional drama was due to just delivering a child. That set many women into emotional upheaval.

This obsession she had developed for Erik did no one any good. Raoul had taken to sleeping in another bedroom when Christine told him she wished she had never left her Angel that night.

Antoinette knew with complete surety Christine did not believe a word of what she said. Her mental state had her confused. Having a child with her near perfect husband and life had brought home the reality that her angel had been set adrift. He had no one other than Antoinette.

Antoinette began to think perhaps Christine needed to see Erik once more so she could let him go. She needed to know that his life had not ended when he lost her although Antoinette had thought it to be touch and go for a time.

Raoul did not speak to Christine. He only spoke to Antoinette when politeness demanded he do so. The final straw was when Christine told the priest to Christen her son Raoul Erik de Chagny. His own son carried another man's name. At least Christine did not shame him entirely by naming his son Erik Raoul thus placing Raoul second to Erik. Moreover he was a man who had vied for Christine's affections, while trying to murder him. Raoul stood stoically by as his son had been named for another in front of God and his family.

In front of everyone Raoul had held his tongue. So much gossip already made the rounds concerning his marriage to Christine why add fuel to the inferno?

After coming home and sitting down to lunch, Raoul could not hold off any longer. Antoinette's presence did not deter him from bringing up the subject near and dear to his heart.

"Christine, we will wait a month or two, then go to the priest to set in motion the necessary steps that it will take to rename our son, my son, not some fictious, murderous, damn Angel of Music," by the time the last word left his mouth Raoul all but shouted loud enough to break glass.

"Raoul, please, the servants," Antoinette tried her best to keep things under control.

"What do I care about some eavesdropping, nosy, busybody servanrs? This is my house. I will shout as loud as I damn well please."

"Raoul, please, let us speak of this matter in privacy. I am your wife, not some distant unwelcome relation," Christine spoke with lips trembling with more hurt than any real fear.

"Do you really think it isn't already all over the county that my son, my first born, carries a name not of his father, grandfather or some well loved and respected relative, but a name strange to everyone. Will they not add one plus one and come up with five? They are already asking who might the real father be, who is the man who cockholded me right under my nose," Raoul spoke with steam nearly shooting from every pore.

When the argument had escalated Raoul had stood abruptly knocking his chair over. Slamming his napkin to the table he had told Christine that he would be leaving in the morning for his family home in England. He would be taking his son with him. She was free to come along so she could be reunited with her Angel of Music once more. He was sure Antoinette would not mind traveling with them to keep Christine company as she must return home also.

Raoul told Christine he would give her three weeks to work out her feelings. After three weeks he would be going home to France taking his son with him. He would arrange for an account for her to use until she decided what she would do. She would no longer be welcomed in his home after those three weeksnif she remained behind.

Antoinette stared in shock as Raoul strode angrily from the room. This had been coming for some time now but it was still a shock. Poor Raoul had listened at first to Christine's ramblings with patience as Antoinette had told him some women get very emotional during the first few weeks after delivery. He had been a saint as far as Antoinette was concerned.

As Christine continued to sob while bemoaning the fact that she did not know what to do as she felt she loved both men, Antoinette felt her own patience with Christine topple over the edge of her tolerance.

"Stop that caterwauling this instant. I have been patient with you. Both Raoul and I have. Enough is enough. You should be ashamed young lady," she paused to catch her breath.

"Carrying on about one man in the presence of your husband is shameful beyond anything I have ever witnessed. What did you think would happen when you named Raoul's own flesh and blood after the man who tried to kill him? A man who did outrageous things just to win you? Raoul is being far more generous than I would be in his place. I'd have given you the boot. I love you as I love Meg but that does not blind me to your faults," Antoinette struggled to keep hold of her anger lest Christine's mournful face defeated her determination.

"I had thought the issue of Erik had been resolved on your part. I see now it has not. I will take you to see Erik if that is what you want. You must first let me go home to warn him so he has time to adjust. So help me if you hurt him again Christine I will personally take you over my knee then you will no longer be welcome anyplace I happen to be. I caution you to tread lightly where Erik is concerned. He is a very fragile man at the present time."

"How can you speak so cruelly to me? You know what I went through, all the things Ang…Erik did to me and Raoul. Maman I still cannot get him out of my mind even after all the horrible things he did. I dream of him, such disturbing dreams. Not dreams in which he hurts or threatens me. These dreams show Erik as another person than the man I knew as my Angel," Christine blew her nose loudly on the folded napkin resting in her lap. Antoinette had to hide a reluctant smile.

"I get so confused. I love Raoul but I cannot dismiss what I feel for Er…Erik. It is even hard for me to think of him in terms of a man, a normal man. I find it hard to refer to him as Erik. How was I supposed to move on from what my angel and I shared for so many years? How was I supposed to simply abandon him, never to think of him again?" she plead her case reasonably much to her mother's surprise.

"Everyone expect things from me I cannot do. I have to see Erik again, even if it is only to let him finally go from my heart. At this moment he carries a piece of my heart and soul wherever he goes. If I am to commit solely to Raoul I need him to relinquish his hold on me as I relinquish my hold on him. I don't know if either of us can do that or even if we will be willing to do that. I have tried to forget him. Believe me I have tried. Erik has embedded himself so deeply inside me I could not suddenly be separated from him and expect never to think of him again," glancing hopefully toward the woman sitting across the table from her Christrine saw a glimmer of understanding.

"Please Maman, I beg of you, please understand and do not judge me too harshly. You of all people know what he is like and how easy it is to become enamored of him once you hear him speak or sing."

Antoinette could not help but feel more strongly than ever this plan to let the two former companions meet. Both of them needed a final goodbye. She had thought Erik had suffered in this alone but now she saw that Christine had been suffering from the separation as well.

Antoinette did not believe Christine felt for Erik as she did for Raoul. What she felt was passionate but she had confused emotions about Erik because he had both represented her father when she was younger and then this romantic brooding figure who came from the shadows trying to woo her with passionate song and desperate acts. What young woman would not find such a man appealing? He had been a dark prince come to save her.

Erik had saved Christine. When she had first come to the opera house she had been so melancholy no one could get close to her. She allowed no one in. She kept everyone at a distance, even Meg had not been able to get close to her until she had found her Angel of Music. After that Christine had become a different child. She had dropped her melancholy to become a charming happy little girl.

Erik had done that for her. With his singing and talking to Christine in the gentlest manner he had brought her back to the little girl she had been before her father had died.

Once Antoinette had set her mind to accept the inevitable plans were quickly made. Raoul had dropped his surly manner toward Christine after he and Antoinette had a long discussion about everything that had gone on from the time Christine came to live with her until the present day.

She had made Raoul understand that Christine had idealized Erik in her mind. She did not see him as just a man who was flawed as the rest of us were. For her Erik was still her Angel of Music. An entity sent by her father and therefore perfect.

Even with all that happened and knowing Erik to be a murderer Christine had been unable to accept that her angel was anything other than what she wished him to be. To let go of that idea was to at last lay her father to rest and know he was gone forever. Her mind fought against relinquishing that last tenuous hold she had on her father in the last moments just before he left her in death.

Once she faced the fact of Erik's humanity in the flesh and accepted he was a severely flawed man then she must come to terms with those feelings she had for him as a woman. Those were more difficult to judge as emotions had a way of sometimes fooling us into believing one thing when another was the truth.

Antoinette hoped Christine could distinguish between girlish romantic ideals and real lasting love between a man and a woman.

Raoul had proven himself to be a real man in this drama. Any other man Antoinette knew would have tossed Christine to the streets about now. She would have been thrown out with nothing as well as losing all rights to her son. Raoul loved Christine enough to allow her to chose.

There was not a court in the land that would not support Raoul if that was what he chose to do. Antoinette hoped Christine realized what a wonderful man Raoul truly was. Hopefully they would all come out of this unbroken.

**A/N: I dislike always making Christine either an evil bitch or a wishy washy little girl. I will try to work on making her a stronger character.**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Now we get into Mary's back story a little. Sorry this is late. I meant to post it this weekend. So, here it is. Enjoy. **

**Chapter Thirteen**

**Searching for Rachelle Gordon**

Captain Nathaniel Dent-known to his fellow crewmen as Nathaniel Dent fellow thief and pirate-sat across the desk from Mother Superior recounting to her the tale he and his fellow mutineers had concocted to save their necks.

His version of this tale was so far from the truth as to be almost beyond the boundaries of the known world. He had always been adept at spinning a fine yarn. Like a shark, he too had a dangerous bite. Trusting him was just as deadly as placing ones trust in the cold blooded killer of the sea.

He did not tell of killing Captain Donovan so that he and his crew could take the small bit of treasure they had been carrying along with the novice Rachelle Gordon.

The Captain had contracted with the church to convey the churches golden statues and other paraphernalia to a colony of lepers for their newly built church.

Nathaniel along with his cronies had heard of the shipping companies deal with the church through the usual unsavory channels. They had also heard there would be golden statues and chalices as well as a number of golden crosses. What a waste of such fine treasure. Those cursed by God himself had no need for such fineries.

Getting together with a few of his cronies Nathaniel had asked what need did those disfigured freaks have for golden Christian offerings? Would not plain tin cups serve them just as well? Could they not worship a wooden cross just as well as one made from gold?

Everyone agreeing that indeed they could worship with one as well as the other, it was decided to shanghai a portion of the present crew doing away with them permanently then hire on in their places.

All had gone smoothly. Only a couple of days into the voyage the mutiny had taken place. All the other crewmembers had been made to walk the plank. Captain Donovan had proven to be a little harder to subdue. He had gotten hold of a few of the crew's stored weapons.

Along with Rachelle Gordon he had hidden out in the ship. If the damn storm had not risen to grander proportions they would have found him sooner. The storm had taken their focus from the manhunt to saving the ship.

The mast had snapped falling in the water. The wind had taken anything that wasn't battened down off the deck with little effort.

When things had calmed somewhat the search had begun again for Captain Donovan and the woman. The Captain had been spotted and shot. He had fallen down a hatch into the room bellow deck.

That chivalrous man had used the last bit of his strength to cut the ropes that had bound the captive's hands. Crafty Rachelle Gordon had already found a way to untie her ankles which had been how she had managed to run away from the sailor assigned to bring her to Nathaniel on deck.

Unfortunately for Nathaniel the Captain had survived his fall down the short flight of stairs. He had used a pistol to kill the first man following him below. This distraction had given the woman a chance to make a run for the hatch at the back of the ship. Being free now of her bindings it had been easy for her to climb atop ship.

They had seen her climbing on the railing. When she had seen them coming she had jumped into the churning water. After only a few seconds she had come bobbing up. Damned if the waves did not take her right to the broken bit of mast floating in the water.

Nathaniel had thought his troubles over with the sure knowledge that she would not survive in such a storm. Nobody, not even the saints earned that much grace from God.

They had returned to England with the tale of pirates overtaking them during the storm. With the heaving seas and being overrun with pirates it had been a tough battle. Many had lost their lives.

Poor brave Captain Donovan had given his life trying to save Rachelle Gordon, the novice cut down in the prime of her life before she could give service to those in need at the colony. She and the Captain had been washed overboard while trying to fend off a few of the pirates. No one could help him as they all were locked in life and death battles of their own. The Captain fought bravely until his last breath.

The last Nathaniel had seen of them they were being tossed about near the broken mast. If God watched over them surely they would be saved. A secret smile came to him as pictures of hungry toothy sharks shredded man and woman then swallowed the tasty morsels. It was more likely God had blessed the monsters of the sea with their dinner.

Nathaniel had been rewarded for his supposed bravery by being commissioned as Captain by the owners of the shipping line. Bravery deserved a just reward. Pictures and stories of this caliber meant more business and more business meant more money.

Now he was officially a Captain and still retained the booty he had pirated from Captain Donovan's ship. The crew hired on knowing more coins would be going in their coffers under Captain Dent's command. They all but rubbed their hands together in greedy anticipation.

Rumors of a woman washed up on a beach had reached Nathaniel's ears the last time he was in port. That alone would not have garnered any interest from him. It was the supposition that the woman belonged to some religious order that had gained his attention along with the fact that her appearance coincided with Rachelle Gordon's disappearance.

Nathaniel had paid more attention to the talk after that. It was said the young woman had no memory. His ship was anchored just offshore of King George Port near the village of Crown Point.

Nathaniel knew Crown Point quite well by reputation for an up and coming major crossroads since it was smack dab in the middle of where three sections of railroad met with a fourth on the way. Easy access to the water as well as railway shipping had put the little village on the map. Well to do society had been flocking to the small community trying to buy land so they could build summer estates which they would only occupy for a few months out of the year while the local farmers could use the land all year.

Those public debates Nathaniel well remembered as he had thought the farmers daft for protesting the sale of their property. If they had kept up the payments to the banks they'd have nothing to worry about. Progress was progress and so long as some of jingle made its way to his pocket he'd sell his mother for the right price, if she was alive that is.

Nathaniel played it all concerned in front of the Mother Superior. He let on he had been searching for the woman ever since she had been washed overboard. Worried him right fearful so as he could hardly catch a wink of sleep. He felt twisting the truth a bit a necessary evil. Truth be told he hadn't been sleeping all that much. A certain fine lass had been keeping him company into the wee hours of the morning.

His sad looking face must have convinced her for she told him exactly where Rachelle Gordon had ended up. They themselves had made plans to go and claim their lost soul as soon as they had heard of the woman who had been rescued.

Hastily Nathaniel offered his services. The dear Mother Superior must have much more important things to do than to go about collecting lost sheep from the flock. Let him do the honors as a way of recompense for having lost her in the first place as well as not protecting her as an honorable man should have.

As this was the busiest time of year trying to collect things for Christmas to hand out to the needy Mother Superior gladly accepted the Captain's kind offer. The season for giving may be a few months off but convincing those with fat purses to lighten the load did not make for an easy task. The good Captain had offered impeccable credentials from the company he worked for. They had even claimed him to be heroic in his attempts to save the original captain of his ship as well as Rachelle. Being a woman believing in the good in all men what need did she have to worry?

With the whereabouts of the potential destroyer of his plans in hand, Nathaniel set about hoisting sail to go and retrieve his charge. If something happened along the way as he tried to return her to her rightful home, well all would be saddened to hear of it but accidents happened all the time while at sea.

Perhaps the poor dear would become so overwhelmed by the knowledge that she may never regain her memories and would jump from the side rail of the ship, leaving a sad suicide note behind.

Nathaniel decided he would check into the inn at Crown Point then ask around for directions to where this mysterious masked man lorded over his estate.

Finding the small inn Nathaniel set about getting the information he needed as well as a horse to use for the duration of his stay. He hoped to be back aboard ship in a couple of days, three at the most.

Having procured a mount Nathaniel rode out to where he would find his little sea urchin. The girl had to be one of the luckiest people he knew to have survived like she had. Then to land on some wealthy doorstep was truly miraculous. If Nathaniel believed in God and goodness he would have left well enough alone. Ah well, loose ends were meant to be severed.

When Nathaniel got Miss Gordon alone he planned on changing her luck. His own had been going rather splendidly and he wished to keep it that way. He would take no chance that her memory would not come back. That sword was far too dangerous to dangle over his head for the rest of his life.

Coming to the gates of the estate Nathaniel stopped his horse to give himself a moment to reflect on just how he should make his approach.

He had to seem concerned but not overly adamant that Miss Gordon return with him. She must of course come at all costs, but he had to make it seem as if she wanted to return even if the opposite were true.

Considering the lady had been on her way to being a nun perhaps he should be all fatherly toward her. Remembering how attractive she was Nathaniel thought he might not be able to pull off fatherly concern. His loins tightened just thinking of that pretty little wench. He'd bet his eye teeth that no man had touched her.

He knew the whole sorry tale of Miss Rachelle Gordon's past. The Mother Superior had been so helpful with all those details. Knowing something about Miss Gordon's past would make his claim of an acquaintanceship seem all the more real.

Setting his horse in motion Nathaniel approached the home of Mr. Lefèvre with confidence. He would come away with his charge, if not today then the day after.

As Nathaniel came into the main courtyard a man approached him. This man looked to be a worker and not one of the household staff or owners. His clothing was too plain and a bit shabby. Nathaniel and shabby were former acqaintences.

Jacob grabbed hold of the reins looking up at their visitor. Rarely did anyone come beyond the gates of the estate. In the beginning they had but Mr. Erik had soon made his wishes known on that point.

"Might I be of service Sir?" Jacob asked enquiringly.

Nathaniel did not bother to answer until he was on ground level. He'd not be run off before he made his intentions known.

"I am here seeking a young woman I have been told resides here, Rachelle Gordon. I believe she suffered some ill fate and lost her memory. I have been sent in place of a church representative to collect the young lady."

"Do you have some papers I may present to Mr. Erik? He will not be handing Miss Mary over to just anyone." Jacob eyed this newcomer with suspicion. Mr. Erik would not be pleased someone had come for Miss Mary. He suspected Miss Mary would not be happy either. The two of them had become somewhat close over the last few weeks. Going riding and having picnics. They read together in the library at the end of every evening. Mr. Erik even played the piano for Miss Mary. Of late he had even been heard singing to her.

The staff had not missed the dreamy eyed look of Miss Mary or the not so dour countenance of Mr. Erik. Jacob himself could have sworn he saw an actual smile cross Mr. Erik's lips when he saw Miss Mary approaching him at the stables just before one of their rides.

Jacob waited for the gentleman to remove a thick envelope from his inner pocket. He had been hoping the man had no such papers of introduction. Jacob could then have sent him on his way with a clear conscience.

Jacob raised his hand toward one of the stable boys. Tim ran over taking the reins from Jacob. Tim took the animal to a hitching post by the watering trough as Jacob instructed. No need to be inhospitable to an animal just becasue his rider wasn't welcome.

Bowing at the waist like a gentleman Jacob asked Mr. Dent to follow him. Entering the house Jacob asked Mr. Dent to wait in the front parlor while he informed the master he had a visitor.

Leaving the room sedately Jacob took off at fast clip as soon as he entered the hallway. He must find the others and inform them what had happened. They'd know what to do and how to handle this new wrinkle in Mr. Erik's life.

Jacob came to a skidding stop just inside the kitchen. He ignored Cook's frown along with her chastising tone as she scolded him for running in the house. He had more important matters at the moment to discuss.

After informing everyone of this new problem Jacob waited for their reactions and thoughts. Lizzy and Brielle thought they should send the gentleman packing. Jacob asked what good would that do? He'd simply come another day and perhaps Mr. Erik himself would be out in the courtyard to greet the gentleman. Who knew how their employer would react?

Given his past and his reactions to others opposing him it did not seem such a good idea to Jacob to let Mr. Erik face this man without someone with him or at least informing him before he stumbled upon the man at some point.

Mr. Erik and Mary were not due back for another hour or so. If they asked the gentleman to return to the inn and wait for someone to fetch him that would not be impolite would it? Jacob now wished he'd gone ahead and told the man the master of the house was not at home and no, he could not wait. If he wished to make an appointment he could send a note requesting a day and time.

In the end they thought it best to encourage the gentleman to leave post haste. That way the gentleman would not be sitting around waiting to waylay Mr. Erik. This would give them time to prepare him for the meeting. They could also hustle Miss Mary into another room and calmly prepare her for meeting this man also.

Jacob had a feeling Mr. Erik would not be too pleased with anyone coming to take Miss Mary away from them at this point. From what he knew of Mr. Erik's past and his losses, Jacob could understand Mr. Erik becoming mighty upset to face someone looking to take Miss Mary away from him.

It had not gone unnoticed the number of picnics the couple had taken or the fact of Mr. Erik offering to lesson Miss Mary's workload, which being conscientious she declined.

If Jacob had been of a nature such as his brothers or even Mr. Erik from his past, Jacob could think of many ways to solve their problem with no one being the wiser. Sometimes being honorable did not lend one to achieving what one wanted in this life.

Jacob took on the errand of informing their unwanted visitor of the situation. Nate had looked at Jacob with suspicion. Being of a dishonest nature himself he did not take anyone's word at face value. He could not discern any lack of truthfulness in Jacobs's demeanor or in any shiftiness of his eyes. Nate had learned to control that telltale sign of dishonesty as a young lad.

Jacob felt relief when their visitor had given his consent to leaving without seeing the master or Mary. He assured Mr. Dent that at the first opportunity he would inform his employer of his visit.

That man Mr. Dent had cast a suspicious eye around as he left. Did he think that they had Mary hidden in some place holding her against her will?

Knowing a bit about Mr. Erik Jacob forgave the man his suspicious nature as it was not beyond the realm of possibility that Mr. Erik would kidnap and hide someone he cared for. Rumors aside Jacob had discerned on his own acquaintance with the man that Mr. Erik could be very passionate about things as well as disregard the proper way of obtaining them.

Glancing around with a heavy sigh Jacob trudged back to the others so they could begin removing all the breakable items sitting innocently waiting to be thrown in a fit of anger. Madame Giry had begun to buy cheap imitations of Mr. Erik's collection of art. After a few glass missles shattering agaisnt the walls they learned to stealthily remove the good and replace it with the imitations. Worked for everyone.

Worse came to worse, there were several places a body could be buried and no one would ever find it. Good to know. Never know when a man might need such information. Jacob never had but...


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter Fourteen**

**Nightmare's Return**

Erik and Mary had returned from a very enjoyable day spent riding and simply sitting enjoying one another's company. Erik could say with all honesty he had never spent time with anyone and not had the subject of music enter his mind. Mary was like the sweetest symphony, the light melodic whispers of melodies carried on a soft summer's breeze. She was light, she was music, every breath, every beat of her heart, every word spoken tickled his ears just as music did.

When he and Mary were together there seemed to be so many more important things that needed to be discussed. Mary naturally could not tell him about her past but he could learn about the things she liked now and how she felt about matters at the present time using what knowledge she had gained living with him and the others for the last few months.

No sooner had they entered the front door than they were set upon by his staff. Jacob being the calmest of the group, Erik bade him to explain what had happened.

Once Erik had been made aware of the man coming to take Mary away his first instinct had been to go and seek the man out to either send him peacefully on his way or consign this threat to some dark hole in the ground where he would never be found.

Mary's gasp then near collapse drew his thoughts from the path of dark deeds he had been headed down. Picking her up Erik strode to the parlor. Laying her down he instructed someone to bring a glass of water and the smelling salts.

Sitting on the edge of the settee Erik patted Mary's cheek and hand. She began to stir. At first her eyes only fluttered then stayed open to look at Erik with such fear he could only scoop her into his arms wishing to slay any dragon daring to seek to harm her.

"Erik I don't want to go. I want to stay with you. Please do not send me away. I don't know what my life had been before but the life I have now seems to be the one that suits very well.

I have someone…I have people I care deeply about and who I think care for me. This shadowy life I led before holds no appeal for me. Why could they not leave me to remember or not on my own?"

Mary clung to Erik tightly. He did not care if the servants saw his tears or not. All that mattered at the moment was comforting Mary and figuring out what to do next.

Erik wanted to whisk her away but felt he must not think in those sort of terms. Mary may not believe it now but eventually she would regain her memory or wish to do so as everyone needed to know where they came from. Connection with family Erik considered to be one of the most important things in life.

He should know as he did not really remember much about his own mother other than her neglect and cruelties. He had no memory of his father at all. He had not even had the privilege of knowing his last name.

For Mary, he would let go of her so she could revisit her past. If she found her old life then decided to come back to him then he would know she really wanted to be with him. He would never have doubts again.

"Mary I do not wish for you to ever leave me." Mary hugged him all the tighter upon hearing this declaration. Erik pulled her arms from around his neck. He had to be strong as he looked into her trusting eyes.

"I want you to stay but you must go back to where your old life ended. Your past is out there waiting for you. I will be here waiting for you. Always.

If you become frightened all you need do is send me a message and I will come for you. No matter where you are or how long you have been away, I will always answer your call to me."

That would be as close to a declaration of love as Erik would come under the circumstances. Without looking he felt the others taking in the scene with avid curiosity as well as concern. Looking into her face he saw love shining back at him. Neither felt the need to declare it at the moment. Whatever happened they would know in their hearts that they were loved.

For the rest of the evening Erik and Mary sat in the parlor holding one another closely. She fell asleep with her head on his shoulder while Erik remained awake. He could not bear to waste one moment they had left in sleep.

Erik would hate every moment Mary spent away from him but he would let her go. He would not repeat any mistakes he had made in his past. Besides, with Mary he felt more confident that she would return to his side.

He felt they could love so completely and not be together. If he had dreams of Christine being his life's companion they had only been vague illusions created in his own mind. This time his love returned the same intense emotions that he felt for her.

When the sun began to make its way over the horizon Erik carried Mary to her bed so she could continue to sleep while he made himself ready to face the person who would be taking her away from him. The man had better have impeccable credentials or face the consequences.

Taking his breakfast Erik barely touched anything. He felt he could not stomach anything at the moment. Mary had come down refusing to be deterred from her daily routine.

He let her have her way in this her last day in his house, for a while at least. She needed these last moments to carry with her when she left. He could understand that.

At times he wished he could have gone back to say a private farewell to the opera house without an angry mob shouting for his blood.

The ringing of the front doorbell had Erik tensing in every muscle. He saw Mary scurrying toward the kitchen with Lizzy and Brielle close on her heels.

Jacob paused in the doorway to convey some silent message. His butler Bernard gave his own silent message just before he went to answer the door.

The moment the man came into the room every instinct Erik had told him to take Mary and run. Nothing outwardly unsettling could be discerned. Having come across some of the world's most cruel and evil people Erik felt himself somewhat of an expert in that area. His own past put him very close to those same men. The one difference between them and Erik was that Erik did not lay his hands on a child or a woman.

This man Erik knew deep in his bones had a cruel streak. It showed clearly in his eyes if one knew what to look for. Having been the victim of cruelty for much of his life as well as the perpetrator of such actions he felt qualified to know when he saw it in others.

Bernard reluctantly announced Erik's guest. "Sir, a Mr. Nathaniel Dent has come to call upon you for a moment of your time."

Not liking this man without even speaking to him Erik wished he could offer the man to leave peacefully or place him in a hole so deep no one would ever find him. If he had his druthers Erik would opt for the deep hole.

"Mr. Dent may I offer you some refreshment? Tea or perhaps coffee?" Silently Erik added his other two offers.

"No, thank you all the same. I am on a tight schedule. I must leave before the tide recedes or be stuck here another night.

I imagine you know how important catching the tide can be." Nathaniel tried to put on his best airs. This man looked too closely at him for any slips in his performance.

Reaching into his inner pocket Nate drew out the letter of introduction as well as the letters from different officers in the shipping company. They wrote the letters solely on the recommendation of the owner of the company's misplaced trust in him. People really were lazy when it came to investigation. They were more willing to take the word of some stranger as long as it had been written down for posterity. Did they think it made whatever was written more trustworthy than mere spoken words?

Erik looked over the documents closely. If he hoped to find something that looked forged he did not find it. Having read the documents several times he could find nothing that would explain his gut reaction to this man.

If Erik could legally withhold Mary he would. In his position he could not bring in any authorities. He knew Mary did not want to go and could use that but then would that not make him a selfish bastard for denying her the chance to regain some of her past?

He himself would kill to know more of who he had been and who his family had been even though what he did remember gave him nightmares. He had always had the belief that there had been at least one person who had wanted him in this world otherwise he felt he would have been left to die by his uncaring mother. Someone had forced her to carry out her motherly and Christian duties.

Mary deserved to know as much about herself as could be remembered. He would let her go with the understanding that he would be here to welcome her back is she so chose to return to him.

Erik rose to his feet to say in a grim tone, "I shall bring her in a moment. If you would excuse me?" Poor manners or not Erik needed to take his leave of Mr. Dent or give in to his urge to rid the world permanently of the man. Proper or not he would bring Mary into this man's presence.

Nate raised his brows at his host's tone and bearing. Clearly the man had found something that displeased him about Nate. Having put forth his best effort Nate could find no fault with anything he had said or done to bring about this attitude in his host.

Coming to stand on his own feet so as to feel less at a disadvantage Nate assured Erik that he would feel quite at home by himself. Nate could not resist the urge to remind his host of his poor manners. A servant could have been called then sent for his charge.

Once Erik had left Nate took the absence of his host to reconnoiter around the room. He found a few silver pieces of art that fit into his pocket nicely. By the time any thievery had been noticed Nate would be long gone and some poor servant would shoulder the blame.

Picking up a matching set of candlesticks Nate put them into his inner pocket. He gave a few experimental jiggles to see if they made any clanking noise that would give the game away. He smiled craftily when he heard no telltale noise. All was right with the world, his world anyway.

Erik found Mary huddled at the kitchen table with everyone gathered around her in a protective half circle. When she saw him she jumped to her feet to run into his waiting arms.

Holding her close Erik smoothed his hand over her back as he spoke to her softly. God knew he did not want her to go but he had to make it easier for her to do so.

Erik explained everything to her as best as he could. At last he lifted her head by placing his fingers under her chin. Her tear drenched eyes almost broke his resolve to let her go.

"Mary you know if I could keep you here and know for certain you would remember on your own I would? This need not be forever. I give you my solemn vow that at any time you wish to come home all you need do is send for me and I will come as quickly as I can." Neither of them took note that Erik referred to his home as Mary's home as well.

Nodding her head Mary leaned against Erik's chest to draw strength from him. She did want to know her past but not at the cost of losing Erik.

She trusted Erik implicitly and if he said she should go she would even if deep down she felt it to be wrong. At least it would settle the issue of her having anyone special in her life. She'd not be entering into the service of the church regardless. That much she felt confident about. Whatever calling she had at one time she no longer felt it to be what she needed or wanted now.

Erik took Mary's hand to lead her back toward the man who would take her from him. Every step he took his mind shouted at him that this was wrong. A mistake had been made and letting Mary go would not be in her best interest.

He quelled that inner voice dismissing it as his own desires trying to gain control of the choice he knew to be what was right even if it felt so horribly wrong.

Nate turned as they entered the room. He stealthily replaced the little figurine he had been going to pocket. He let no emotion show other than what he hoped passed for kind concern.

"Ah, Miss Gordon, so good to see you after such a long absence. You are looking well I am happy to say." Nate barely kept his desirous urges from entering his voice when he saw that delectable young woman. The burgeoning flesh in his trousers he could do nothing to restrain from showing his interest.

He had forgotten just how comely his quarry was. Perhaps he'd keep her a few nights before he dumped her overboard. He could waylay the trip by a day or two claiming some trouble with his sails. He had always been good at thinking on his feet. Lying came as easily to him as breathing.

Mary cast a look toward Erik seeking his comforting presence as some unknown fear gripped her. At the first sound of that man's voice she had gone cold then sweat had popped out on her forehead and upper lip. She felt shivers going up and down her spine. They were not those welcome shivers Erik caused in her.

"How…how do you do Mr. Dent? I am sorry I don't remember you." At this moment if Mary had the power to remove him to someplace else she would do so. Nothing about him instilled comfort in her. She felt threatened without the man saying a word that could be construed as meaning her harm.

"Please Rachael, call me Nate as you did before. You yourself gave me permission to call you by your Christian name, Rachael. Does that sound familiar to you?" Nate did not care if she remembered how to buckle her shoes. All he wanted to know at this time was whether or not she had any recollection of what had happened that night on the ship.

If he could be certain she would not remember his past misdeeds he might let some of his old rusty, kinder emotions spare her life. On second thought he supposed being sure she could not tell any tales would be best. Dead men, or in this case women, tell no tales.

Reluctantly Mary excused herself to gather the few personal items she had collected in the short time she had been here. It only took a few minutes as she had very little of her own. As reassurance of her return a brush remained in waiting on her small table.

Erik stood outside after having helped Mary into the carriage. He had wanted to kiss her fiercely but if he had taken her in his arms once more Mary would never have left his side again while he drew a breath.

Needing to have something of hers Erik ran into the house going straight up the stairs to her room. Falling to his knees beside the bed he gathered the bedding in his arms that still held Mary's sweet fragrance.

He could not contain the agonizing cry that rose up from deep within him to roar out into the silence of the house. At the first heart stopping keen everyone stopped whatever they had been doing as the sound reverberated throughout the house.

Once again the villagers would hear the haunting howls drifting on the wind. Their tortured ghost had returned.


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: Sorry for the long delay. I am working on a couple of other stories. One on Fictonpress called Innocense Lost and the other is a story based on the Janet Evanovich characters. Ranger is the star of this rodeo. He'll be paired with someone other than Stephanie. Will be posting the first chapter later today. Please give it a go. Let me know what you think. **

** Chapter Fifteen**

**Suffering**

It had been two days with the master of the house showing no signs of letting go of the grief that had overtaken him since Mary had left.

He forbade anyone to touch a single item in her room. When she came back it would be as she had left it. They all knew he had taken to sleeping in her bed at night if one could call a nightly ritual of heart breaking sobs sleeping.

Not even Jacob could reach Mr. Erik. If something did not soon occur to change things this time he would surely end up in the ghostly realm. He had stopped eating again other than a bite here and there. If someone stayed in the room fidgeting with things around the room Erik took a bite so as to appease whoever brought him the meal. He had no real interest in eating.

As soon as Mary had passed beyond the gates of his estate Erik had felt her drifting further away mentally and physically. He lost that connection he had felt with her when she resided in his home. He feared that meant she had been forgetting him as well.

The second night Erik had a dream which disturbed him. Mary had been reaching out to him calling his name with such longing and despair the feelings stayed with him even after he woke.

After he woke his mind could not focus on anything other than his dream. He felt unease instead of the usual pain. Going into Mary's room Erik had been overcome by an emotion that felt like fear. Not his own but Mary's. Dear God she had not abandoned him, he had abandoned her while he wallowed in self-pity.

He could feel her need of him as if she whispered it in his ear. Erik raced about the house calling for Jacob. Once Erik found Jacob questions were fired at the young man faster than he could think of answers.

In his grief of losing Mary Erik had not thought to ask anything more than for the man's credentials. Where he had been headed had not been a priority at the time. Erik cursed himself for being so careless.

Jacob had been a little more attentive. Once a location had been declared Erik set about making arrangements to follow Mary to the ends of the earth if need be.

Amidst all of this Antoinette arrived with her unexpected guests. The original plan to apprise Erik of Christine's coming had seemed less important after she and Raoul had time to rediscover their love over the past week. Christine had come to realize all she had in Raoul and her child. What did it matter if she had some little part of her that still held some regard for her Angel?

She felt certain Raoul meant more to her than her own life. Erik had been some fantasy left over from her father's passing. Another girl might have outgrown her belief and need for an Angel of Music over the years. It had taken Christine almost losing the most important man in her life to gain the adult knowledge that ones first little pass at affection with a man did not mean that love, a stronger love would never come.

For her it had come in Raoul. She and Raoul had spoken frankly about how they felt about everything. It had been a long conversation in which they had for once both acted maturely. Neither had gotten angry or shouted.

Even now as she stood before the man who had meant so much to her Christine only felt something akin to affection one might feel for a special family member. She sighed deeply as she had feared once under her Angel's influence she might fall into her old habit of adoration.

Antoinette spoke first as everyone seemed to be frozen. "Erik what is all this? Where are you going?"

She referred to the case that sat at Erik's feet. His cape hung around his shoulders and the carriage had been in the drive.

"Mary, I must go to her. I have no time to explain. I must get to her. Something is not right." Erik felt he had just wasted precious seconds saying the little he had. If he thought Antoinette would allow him to get out of the house without a more satisfactory explanation he was sorely mistaken.

Knowing she would hound his heels until he told her what she wanted to know Erik filled her in as much as he dared on what had been happening while she had been away. He only admitted to having a slightly closer relationship with Mary which would be belied by the fact that he had been ready to go haring off in pursuit of her without any concrete reason why.

Christine stood beside Raoul in wide-eyed wonder. This man before her looked similar to the man she had left in the underbelly of the opera house. The differences in his bearing would have her believing otherwise. He spoke not in an insane voice but one of desperation. This man presented a proud almost noble stature. If one could look closely enough perhaps they might see a hint of his former persona. Christine had expected to see a broken man as he had been when she left him.

She honestly could not say how she felt about this new confident man who had barely looked at her let alone seemed to comprehend just who she was. Christine felt Raoul's questioning gaze on her. She turned to smile reassuringly in his direction. His returning smile seemed to hold the same baffled look she must be displaying at her Angel's continued failure to even greet her. As she listened to the conversation it became clear that her Angel, no, Erik had come to care for a young woman he had rescued from some horrible fate.

Christine only felt a little flicker of jealousy for having been replaced by someone else in her teacher's affections. For the most part she felt relief not to have the burden of his unrequited affections on her shoulders.

When at last Erik seemed to comprehend that it was Christine standing before him in the flesh many conflicting expressions crossed his face. The last of which was regret.

"Christine…I…I" Never having been at a loss for words in her presence before Christine concluded Erik's mind was not in this moment at all. All his thoughts were for this woman he had been going to pursue. A woman he cared for deeply and if she understood correctly she returned his feelings.

"Erik…don't. I understand, believe me I do. We'll have time later. Do what you must. I will be waiting when you return. God speed."

As Raoul moved closer to Christine Erik seemed to notice him for the first time. Only a momentary malevolent emotion passed Erik's face to be replaced by his other concerns. Raoul gratefully took note that Erik would not be Punjabing him any time soon.

Antoinette had heard some worrying gossip while in London. She had heard of a young novice traveling by ship to one of the islands in the Pacific which had been designated the home of lepers. The church had been sending her to spend time on the island giving medical aid as well as assisting the resident priest in his duties as a representative of the church. It had been reported the captain of the ship had come to some sort of unsavory end as well as the novice.

One of the crewmembers of the ship had been burdened by what had actually taken place and come forward to confess all. Antoinette thought his confession had more to do with the fact the man had been told he would not be living much longer than any change of heart. He wanted to clear his conscience before he met his maker.

What he had told the authorities and the church had been a vastly different tale than Captain Nathaniel Dent had reported once he had returned to port.

Antoinette had also heard that not knowing of the man's nefarious deeds the church had sent him to bring back the novice, one Rachael Gordon.

The authorities had sent out men to look for the rogue captain but did not know exactly where he had been headed. The Mother Superior who had sent him was now off in some God forsaken jungle tending to heathens and could not be reached any time soon.

Erik nearly lost the rest of his mind when he thought of that man being anywhere near his sweet innocent Mary. Antoinette had tried to be delicate in the telling of what all this Nathaniel Dent could be capable of but Erik's mind had an all too clear picture of the danger Mary faced.

When Antoinette pulled Erik into her embrace to place a kiss on his cheek both Christine and Raoul stood in wide-eyed wonder. Who would have thought anyone would dare touching this man? Christine had done it under duress. Antoinette did it out of true regard for him.

They all bade Erik farewell sending their prayers for his success along with him. The man who had taken Mary had three days head start.

Raoul had stepped forward to offer his assistance. His yacht was in port at the next town. Erik would have no need to wait for a ship going out or hiring some unknown captain who may or may not be trustworthy. The waiting yacht had been Raoul's surprise for Christine should they both agree to continuing on with their marriage.

Raoul put his crew and yacht at Erik's disposal. Erik accepted the offer not letting past grudges come between him and saving Mary. For her he would walk through the fires of hell to make certain of her safety. Antoinette reminded Raoul of his newly acquired responsibilities. He would not be taking on any pirates in the near future for which Christine silently thanked her mother.

Christine had never been prouder to be Raoul's wife than at the moment he offered an old adversary aid in his pursuit of the woman he clearly loved. If she had had any lingering doubts they had been laid to rest forever by Raoul's kindness toward a man who had tried to kill him at one time. Raoul had proven himself to be a man among men.

Erik only had a moment to regret not being able to have more time with Christine so he could set both of their minds to rest. He had to focus on saving Mary and nothing else.

With a quick farewell Erik went to leave. Jacob met him at the front door standing just outside on the front stoop. He had a blanket wrapped crudely around whatever he had shoved inside.

Before Erik could protest Jacob stated with more command in his voice than he actually felt that he would be accompanying Mr. Erik and no mistake.

The two men stared at one another passing some message between them that would remain unspoken but they knew what it meant. They were not mere employer to employee. They were on an equal footing of man to man, friend to friend. It needed no formal declaration for it to be true.

Nodding his head once, Erik only had one more thing to say before they began their journey. He asked that Jacob call him simply Erik. That said it all as far as the others were concerned.


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: When I wrote this story a few years ago I didn't realize how short some of the chapters were. To compensate I'll put up the next one in a couple days. Thanks for reading. **

**Chapter Sixteen**

**Race With Time**

Erik had only delayed a moment longer as Raoul hastily wrote out an introduction as well as instructions for his crew.

Briefly Erik allowed his attention to drift to Raoul as he wrote out the documents. He had to say the boy had matured over the last year. He had always been a man of honor but this Erik felt went beyond what anyone could expect.

If the roles had been reversed all Erik would remember was a noose around his neck and being tied to a portcullis as his fiancée had been blackmailed into choosing to let him die or marry her kidnapper. He felt for sure he would have murder on his mind and not aiding his enemy. Erik did not care for the connotations attached to that realization. When he had time he would give it further consideration.

All but snatching the envelopes with the papers inside Erik hurriedly took up the seat at the top of the carriage. He would be driving. He did not feel that he could sit inside with nothing to do but worry and imagine all that could be happening to Mary.

Antoinette turned to the remainder of the staff demanding to know all that had been taking place while she had been away. From what she had heard while traveling back to Erik's and what she had learned in the last hour or so she worried for Erik and Mary both.

If anything were to happen to Mary now Antoinette hated to think what might happen to her dear friend. Surely God would watch over Mary. Antoinette had no doubts that once Erik found that detestable fraud he would let nothing stop him from getting to Mary.

Through fits and starts as they interrupted one another and shouted out their explanations, at last Antoinette gained their attention to advise them to speak one at a time.

She further instructed that they make tea and lunch for everyone then bring it into the dining room as that table would be the largest in the house.

If Raoul thought it odd or objectionable to seat himself at the table she did not ask for his opinion. To his credit Raoul seemed quite happy to share the space with anyone as long as he had Christine at his side.

After all had been told the only thing remaining to do was to pray for everyone to come home safely.

Erik did not let up on the horses the whole way. He reached the next village just before dark. His knock at the door of the man who hired out skiffs to tourists had not been happy to be awoken so late at night as his day started so early. Erik's large offer of compensation stilled all further protests.

Once he and Jacob had boarded the small craft Mr. Hopkins began to row strongly toward the anchored yacht. The man felt it his duty to inform his customers of all the gossip.

A foreigner, a French noble no less had the yacht sent ahead as a surprise for his wife. The man whispered conspiratorially that rumor had it the husband might be the one getting the surprise.

The hands on board came into town the last week or so to have a few drinks while spending time with the local ladies. A few drinks loosened their tongues.

It had been told to him by Jasper Jenkins who heard it from a very reliable source that the man's wife had the want of another man between her legs.

They had been all too willing to expound on their employer's woes that had taken place in Paris over a year ago and this recent matter of the young woman naming her son for her lost lover. Bets were being taken as to just who's son had been born. Most everyone figured the Vicomte had been cuckolded by his wife and that mystery man from the opera house.

Erik listened to all of this as the anger rose inside of him. He controlled the urge to throttle the man. Jacob's hand coming to rest on his arm kept Erik seated. To have anyone think such things about Christine left a bad taste in Erik's mouth.

Even if half of it were to be proven true Erik still felt it should not be spoken of outside those directly involved. He allowed only a slight feeling of pride to enter when he heard Christine had named her child for him.

All of this could be thought over once he had completed his task of bringing Mary home safely. By the God's of every religion known to man Erik swore if that man Dent harmed one hair on Mary's head the world would not be a big enough place for him to hide.

Mr. Hopkins called out an ahoy to the night watch. He wanted no one to be shot being mistaken for a pirate.

Explanations were made and the captain summoned. Captain Marcus Rogers was a no nonsense sort of man who believed in getting to the heart of the matter as quickly as possible.

As soon as the deckhand had been informed of their purpose the man had gone to awaken the captain who now stood with his hands behind his back in his stateroom.

He had issued orders to make ready to get underway immediately. All his life Captain Rogers had waited for just such a situation to occur. His romantic swashbuckling side could now be allowed to come out. He had always wanted to rescue a damsel in distress.

Erik and Jacob had been shown to their rooms then invited to come up top when they had settled in. Captain Rogers told them that Captain Dent had a few days head start but the yacht being a trimmer ship could cut through the water faster. With fair weather they should manage to catch up in a couple of days, three at the most if they did not drop their sails at night. That could be risky but if everyone agreed that the risk was minimal and worth it then they'd catch up all the sooner.

Being a man familiar with all the places pirates hid out Captain Rogers figured Dent would head for the coast of Africa. He had heard the man had a stronghold there. Slaves being still a major commodity in many lands Dent stayed where he had easy access to his best money maker.

They would overtake Dent's ship out in open water. To risk taking him after he had reached his stronghold would be suicide. The crew of Dent's ship would outnumber them but Captain Rogers felt his men up to the task ahead of them.

One did not sail the oceans around the world and not learn a thing of two about survival and defending oneself. To a man the Captain had his crews allegiance. Men of honor were the only kind Captain Rogers would command. They all chomped at the bit for a bit of sport.

Erik informed the captain that he wanted them to stay back as far as they could once they caught sight of the other ship. He wanted it to seem as if the yacht were only manned by a sparse crew and some rich noble on a lark.

When night fell Erik would then sneak aboard finding and securing Mary's release then they were all free to do as they wanted.

To a man they knew they could not leave a single soul alive on that vessel. If they did the remaining crew would give chase to the de Chagny yacht out of vengeance as well as to gain whatever riches they might find on board.

Captain Dent and his crew would be well aware that if they left anyone on the yacht remain living they risked being captured, tried and hung for piracy and mutiny.

Erik could not stress enough that he and he alone would board that vessel to retrieve Mary. Not one foot would they step on that ship until Mary had been brought back aboard the de Chagny yacht. Any man who disobeyed this dictate would pay dearly.

Looking into Erik's eyes they had no doubt just how severe and painful their punishment would be if they caused any problems. They vowed to stay on the right side of this dangerous looking man. He did not look quite sane at the moment. Who knew what they would unleash if they crossed him?


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter Seventeen**

**Desperate Pursuit**

Mary sat on the side of the bed biting her lip trying to think of some way to bring about her own release from that horrid man Nathaniel Dent. She did not think of him as a Captain of any seafaring vessel unless it happened to be a pirate's ship.

She could feel Erik as if her were sitting beside her whispering in her ear encouraging her to keep her head and not panic. So far Mr. Dent had not tried anything unseemly but his words at times left no doubt he would be coming for her soon.

Only his need to make sure they made it out of the reach of the English navy had kept him from devoting his time doing only God knows what to her.

Mary felt the sick sinking in her stomach at the mere thought of that man touching her even with one finger. To add to her dislike of the man odd flashes of him chasing her had begun to sift into her mind. She had no recollection of meeting him recently so that meant he had some connection to her past. What she would need to find out as the memories seeped slowly into her mind was how he had been connected to what happened to her.

Mary did not know how she knew but she felt with a surety she had never felt about anything that Erik had already begun a search for her.

Knowing how far he had gone for Christine's favor Mary did not feel conceited to think Erik would do the same for her and more. She had felt his love even if he had not declared the sentiment in the traditional sense. Having been hurt once already, Mary could understand Erik's caution. He had shown her how he felt by every soft and tender touch.

It didn't matter anyway because she knew just how he felt. He could not keep emotions from his melodic voice. He had never forced her to go beyond anything in intimacy that she felt to be wrong. In fact Erik had been the one to call a halt more than once.

No matter how frustrated he was Erik always stopped before things got out of hand. Mary had often thought if left to her they would already have become lovers in the truest sense of the word. Erik held back wanting to wait until they were wed before taking that final step.

Now Mary could only hope Erik came for her or she found some way out of this before being defiled by Dent or one of the other scurrilous men on board.

Even though Dent had all but ordered her to call him Nate Mary found it distasteful on her tongue to be so familiar with a man she felt she could come close to despising. On further thought she felt sure she would be comfortable in her conscience disliking the man wholeheartedly.

Although she felt sure her faith did not uphold with such negative emotions Mary could not help feeling them just as she could not hold back the love and admiration she felt in overwhelming waves just thinking of Erik.

Suspecting that her food held more than disgusting preparation Mary had forgone nourishment except for the fruit in the basket on the table beside her bed. Only a few grapes and an apple remained. If her calculations were accurate she figured Erik might overtake the ship within a few days. She had faith in him even if she could not come to a reasonable means for him to do so in her mind.

He would have need of some ocean going vessel to pursue her. That would take time. So many arrangements would need to be performed. Logically Mary could see Erik being delayed for a week or more but with that same sixth sense she had felt where he was concerned she felt as if he were already on his way to her.

She did not know of the situation that had resulted from Antoinette's return but held the strong belief that somehow Erik would perceive her plight and come for her.

Romantic and unrealistic it may be but for now it was all that kept her from going completely crazy. She'd not give into that horrible man who pretended to have rescued her. If she had to fight until her last breath she would do so.

Erik would not find a fallen woman once he caught up with her. The privilege of receiving her innocence would be his alone to take not some uncouth sot pretending to have the manners of a gentleman when he had not one gentlemanly bone in his makeup.

If worse came to worse Mary had decided the candlestick would make a fine weapon if things turned uglier than they were at the moment. She'd not sit like a meek lamb waiting for the slaughter.

Coming aboard she had made sure to notice where the lifeboats were just in case. At that time it had been only a fear of being on a ship again that had worried her, not who she had been with.

She had read the mistrust in Erik's eyes as well as seen his indecision as to whether he would allow her to leave. Now she wished Erik had carried out the threat she had seen in his eyes to take her away someplace where no one would find her.

His instincts that had been honed over years of surviving against all odds had been ringing loudly for Erik but everyone else had only seen it as his unwillingness to be parted from her.

Shouting coming from up top drew Mary's attention from her inner turmoil. She could not make out what all the commotion was about but she had gleaned enough to know that a ship had been spotted off the portside bow.

Lord what she would not give for a porthole. She didn't know how or why she knew it but she did know that Erik was one of the passengers on that ship. She felt it in the very marrow of her bones that he had come for her.

Having been standing with her ear pressed to the door Mary stumbled backward when the door pushed inward with some force. She fell to the floor raising her eyes to see Dent towering over her with a look of worry and anger.

"Well it would seem we may have to postpone our getting acquainted until much later than I planned. I can't say for sure what ship is trailing in our wake but I have a hunch we both know who one of them will be. I must say I had thought the man would disappoint me. I had expected him to come much earlier. Perhaps it isn't him at all. Well either way we'll know in a day or so if they continue to keep pace with us.

I may have to make the decision to board that fine lady of the sea taking all she has to offer. Unfortunately I have all the crew I need at the moment."

Nate squatted down so he could put his face closer to his captive's wide-eyed stare. She looked more wary than frightened.

"If it is that besotted fool if I am in a generous mood I may let you see him before I end his life. I just might be in the mood to make it swift. What sort of compensation might I get if I go easy on him, make it quick like. I can be honorable."

Mary snorted in disbelief. She could not see this man outsmarting Erik or winning against him in any fair fight. Looking closer Mary could see that for all his bravado Dent had fear in his eyes. It was well hidden but being this close to him she could see it flickering behind the self-assured air he tried to present.

She ducked her head as she could not keep the smile from crossing her lips as she imagined what Erik would do to this man once he had him in his hands.

Having heard about many of Erik's less stellar accomplishments she had no doubt he could handle Dent. Erik she felt could form a plan as not many men could on such short notice.

He would come for her and when he did she would be ready. If that meant she must sleep with one eye open and one ear cocked then so be it.

As Dent leaned forward to try to steal a kiss Mary stuck her hand between them to shove it underneath his chin. She felt satisfaction to hear his teeth clank together. Her moment of glory only lasted for a moment.

Viciously Dent backhanded her across her left cheek. Her head jarred so violently she swore she heard bells ringing. The force had jerked her head pulling the muscles in her neck causing pain to shoot up from her shoulders to the top of her head.

"You'll pay for that in a more satisfying manner little Miss once this is over. I had planned to take you slow so as to ease your discomfort but now I think I'll treat you as the little hellion you have proven yourself to be."

Nate rubbed his jaw smiling as he anticipated taming this little spitfire. He liked a little fight in his women. That made the conquest all the sweeter.

"I shall leave you now my dear. I must prepare now for company. Should this vessel be other than some rich noble out for a lark I'll be ready for your Mr. Lefèvre if and when he comes. Good-night to you sweet Rachael."

As Dent left shutting the door behind him then clicking the lock Mary stood wondering for a moment who he had been speaking about. Then she remembered that he had told them that her real name was Rachael Gordon.

Nothing about the name seemed to bring any recognition. She had felt more when that evil eyed Dent had been speaking to her. Flashes of things crowded into her mind each time he came to speak with her.

What her mind began to show her she did not like at all. If only half what she saw had actually happened this man Dent would be even a greater threat to Erik or anyone who tried to put a stop to what he wanted to do.

Letting her memories come without forcing them Mary did not have long to wait as once they began coming a flood of images and remembered conversations entered her mind.

She remembered how Dent's men had come yanking her from a sound sleep to drag her up on deck. They had already had the captain and his crew tied up at that point.

In the night the mutineers had overtaken the honest sleeping men and thrown overboard the ones on nightwatch.

The men Dent had brought with him to sign on as crew had stood behind him when he mutinied taking over the ship and dispersing with the crewmembers who were loyal to the former captain.

Painfully Mary saw behind her closed eyes Dent beating the man who had captained the ship since they left port. Bravely that man had risked his life by creating a distraction so that Mary could escape them.

She had made it into hiding down below. What she had thought that would accomplish she could only defend her silly action by being frightened half out of her wits.

She jumped as the clear memory of her savior being dropped down into the lower portion of the ship with knife wounds as well as his various other injuries from several beatings he had already endured as he fought back to regain control of his ship.

When he had bravely told her to leave him at first she had not wanted to leave him. Knowing he had not long to live he had bid her to make her escape while she could.

That was when her survival instincts had kicked in. She had not wanted that brave man's sacrifice to have been made for nothing. If nothing else she wanted to survive so she could inform the authorities of Dent's criminal action by taking over the ship as well as his murderous actions against the captain and his crew.

Now it came to her that she had made it to the rail. Climbing up she had caught her habit on something. Clearly as if were only now happening she could hear the shouts getting closer, the rending of her clothing, the stinging slap of rain that pelted down.

One last glance over her shoulder before she jumped had coincided with a flash of lightening. Fearing what would befall her if she did not escape she, Rachael Gordon, had jumped blindly into the churning ocean.

Every bit of her life came back to her. Every pitiful year of her life while in the care of the church lay open for her to replay as she wished.

He mother had not been married the sisters had told her. Left in the care of the church she had been raised to become a member of the sisterhood at the proper time.

Over the intervening years the sisters had taught her many skills. Nursing being what she had liked the most. Because of her success with handling the infirm of body and mind Rachael had been sent to many foreign lands to administer to the sick while priests attended to their immortal souls.

Some of those people had not wanted to be invaded by outsiders. Having no wish to change their beliefs had at times put everyone in danger.

Only Rachael's natural ability to calm the most disagreeable of people had saved them at times. Her nursing skills as well as her ability to overlook the flaws of others had been why they had been sending her to one of the leper colonies.

If she did not contract the disease she would have been brought back after a year of serving her Lord and his stricken children so she could take her vows and join the other sisters of the order where she had grown up.

Rachael Gordon seemed like another person to Mary. She much preferred her life as Mary. She did not have anything against that life even if she had suffered many punishments from those men who had thought her to be far too headstrong as well as prideful of her appearance.

Mary had not wanted her hair to be cut that first time when she turned fifteen. Such a fuss she had thrown. That had earned her a beating on her back. Five lashes of the birch whip.

The memory brought the sting to her back as if the whip struck her once again. Erik for all his threats and shouting had never made her feel as badly as those men of God had made her feel with their predications of her being hell bound with only a slight hope of being saved from the fires of hell.

She much preferred Erik's tirades any day. Although since they had come to an understanding he had kept a better grip on his temper. Not much bothered him lately either. Everyone had reaped the benefit of Erik's newfound tranquility.

What she wouldn't give now for one of his blistering bouts of profanity. On closer acquaintance Mary had come to know that much of Erik's rants had been for the sake of bluster once he had begun to get over that Daaé woman.

He had not had a bout of depression in so long Mary had nearly forgotten how pitiful he had once been. With her, once the hurdle of his acceptance had been passed that she could indeed care for him, Erik had seemed to grow in stature as well as confidence around others.

He had not been able to discard the mask and she felt he may never get to that point but what did it matter? Everyone wore a mask at some time in their life. She much preferred Erik's as she knew what he hid. Others were not so easily seen for the monsters they were underneath the masks they wore.

Erik had declared himself a monster during one of their days out of doors. He could not comprehend why she would tolerate his lips touching hers. She had forbidden him to ever refer to himself in that way again. He was far from being a monster.

Case in point, the menacing Mr. Dent. Many would find him charming as he picked their pockets clean. With Erik she had found that once he gave his trust one would know what to expect from him. He was a loyal man for all that people thought him otherwise. He had also been proven to be tolerant of those less fortunate as his hiring of his servants proved.

Grasping her hands together Mary prayed for Erik to come soon. She had faith in him. He would not let that man harm her of this she felt certain.


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: Sorry, another very short chapter. What was wrong with me when I wrote this story? It is several years old so its creation did come when I was still learning to write. **

**Chapter Eighteen**

**Introspection**

Erik had a hard time keeping to his own dictate that they go slowly and wait for the proper cover of darkness before an attempt at rescue could be made.

Every hour that passed would be that much longer Mary had to endure only God knew what mishandling. Erik dare not think of that man touching his innocent Mary. He could not let himself lose control now. He needed his wits about him if he wanted to succeed in bringing Mary safely home.

Standing at the rail looking down into the blue depths of the ocean Erik could well imagine Mary as she was when he first found her. She had looked like a beached mermaid. A bedraggled one at first but later she had revealed herself to be one who had lured him to her without meaning to do so. He could almost laugh at the memory of how he and Mary had gone toe to toe on a few occasions. She brave woman that she is had stood her ground except for that first time.

He felt on that occasion she had run from him as he had surprised her as well as the fact that she felt embarrassed after having seen him all natural from the top of his head to the toes on his feet.

At the time it had not seemed in the least amusing. In fact he had been enraged. He could say that it had been more her seeing his face than anything else that had brought him to such immediate and furious anger.

He did still feel guilty for having frightened her that time even if she continued to swear that it had not been fear of him personally that had sent her haring off as if hells fire had ignited just behind her.

Mary had not let him forget that she knew what his mask hid as well as what his clothing covered. His own face had burned a few times when she had become very explicit about what she appreciated concerning certain features men and women did not discuss in mixed company. Erik could not imagine even men speaking of such personal details amongst themselves.

Over time he had discovered Mary had the heart of a little rogue at times. She enjoyed teasing him and disconcerting him much to his chagrin.

He didn't mind really although he pretended to be displeased. She would then try to cajole him into a better mood. Often he pretended displeasure when he felt none just so she would use her womanly wiles to persuade him not to be upset with her.

For her part Erik suspected she knew he held no real rancor toward her. As he recalled during those times her secretive little smile that barely played at the corners of her mouth always preceded those moments when she tempted him almost beyond his endurance.

The nickname of mermaid suited her well but he had begun to think siren should be added to her list of names. All she need do was to enter a room and she had Erik's full attention. If she crooked her finger he would follow wherever she led him.

The moon would be at its dullest tonight with only a tiny sliver left to shine light down with the light of the stars. Not as dark as he would like but it would have to do.

Erik would not have need of any light. He could see well enough in the near dark. Had he not lived in one of the darkest places for most of his life? Those years had instilled some sixth sense when maneuvering around in darkness. He couldn't honestly say he could see any better than anyone else but he could sense things that others could not.

Trying to keep his mind occupied Erik let his mind drift back to the days when he first approached Christine. What an innocent she had been. So receptive to whatever the voice from the mirror demanded. He could see now he had done Christine a great disservice. After the first few years when she came of an age to understand that although we like to believe in fairy tales the truth is they are only makebelieve. He had not wanted to strip away her childish dreams of her father sending her an Angel of Music. Also he had not wanted to chance losing her affection and trust.

Perhaps fate deemed it time for him to balance the scales between the wrongs committed toward him and the wrongs he committed to everyone else daring to cross his path. Would a just world not see every good thing he did from now on as penance for the horrid past he wanted to leave behind? Mary may not be an angel sent to save him but her very presence in his life made all the difference between light and dark. For her he wanted to be a better person.

With Christine it had been all about take with very little give. With Mary he offered her the world. Everything he had was hers. He only asked for her love in return. Undeserving he may be but Mary did love him despite all the darkness he tried to keep hidden with some success most of the time. There were moments when that dark cold man sought to emerge again.

Tonight that man would be let loose. Erik prayed he could be put back in the furthest recesses of his mind after Mary fell into his embrace once more. This time he would never let her go.

**My love tonight I will come for you. Please keep yourself safe until then. You will not sleep another night without my arms around you, this I give to you as my solemn vow. **


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter Nineteen**

**Mermaids Return**

Erik readied himself for the ordeal ahead. They had gone over the details many times wanting no last minute slipups. While the crew and Jacob waited for Erik's return they would arm themselves then await his return with them sitting in the boats they would have already lowered to the water.

Once Erik returned he would help Mary aboard then leave her with the five crewmembers left behind to guard her just in case things went badly for the rescuers. If the remaining crew thought anything untoward had happened they were to hoist anchor and lift the sails so they could head away from the pirate ship.

For once Erik did not feel as if a sword of doom hovered over him. He felt that if anything horrid had happened to Mary other than being in the clutches of that evil Mr. Dent he would feel her despair to his very soul.

He had confidence in the men watching his back. Erik had never been one to trust his life in the hands of another, until now. With Jacob especially he felt confident he could look forward and not need to worry about what came up behind him or an unexpected broadside.

They lowered the skiff Erik would use on the far side of the ship. It would mean a further distance but they couldn't chance someone catching a flash of something in what little light the night afforded.

Quietly Erik began to row making sure not to dip the oars too quickly so they splashed the water. It might not seem any different from the sounds of the waves but a man familiar with such things could tell the sound of oars hitting the water.

It took him a good twenty minutes to row close enough to the ships hull so the skiff would not be seen if anyone looked out over the railing. As with most ships the rope ladder remained over the side in case the need for a quick exit presented itself. Gripping his knife between his teeth Erik began to climb. Slowly his hands and feet searched for purchase in the darkness.

No noise could be heard other than the sound of the waves washing by with a constant shushing. He couldn't see any movement from this close to the ship but had to assume they had men on night watch duty. Knowing such ruthless men would not have any honor toward doing their duty conscientiously, Erik felt it safe to assume also that those men would be deep in their cups at this late hour.

Even if they were only slightly inebriated that would give him the edge he needed to skulk about with less chance he would be detected. Once on board he would need every skill he had learned while evading detection at the opera house.

His arms soon began to burn and cramp as did his legs. Too long his body had been left to soften. Muscles were now less firm than when he climbed the ropes and catwalks at the opera house. Nothing could make him release his hold short of an act of God. Determinedly he inched his way up. Every inch brought him closer to Mary. That had been all the incentive Erik needed to conquer any discomfort he felt in his body.

Having reached the top Erik tried to find a way to let go of the rope without plunging himself into the bottomless ocean below. Contrary to what one might think it was not so simple to let go of the safety you had your arms wrapped around only to flail about trying to get a firm handhold of the rail. Forcing his hand to release the coarse rope he reached up searching for a place he could find a firm hold on the wooden railing.

Now he had to lift himself up with only his arms until he could the side rails with his legs. His foot slipped several times tiring him with the effort. At last his left foot caught on the thin lip of the rail between two of the spindles.

Once he had both feet firmly planted it then became a simple matter of looking about to make sure no one would be coming by as he lifted himself over the rail. Seeing no one Erik drew himself up so he could throw his right leg over then searched with the toe of his boot for the deck.

As soon as he felt the solidity of the deck Erik drew his other leg to join the first. Crouching down on his haunches he looked about making sure he could move without anyone seeing him. Everything looked to be quiet with not a single man in sight.

Forgiving God for many trespasses Erik felt the deity had placed on him, he said a silent thank you to whoever would listen in exchange for this bit of luck. The rest of his task he thought would be much easier than the first part. Once on solid ground he felt more assured of his chances.

Staying close to the rail Erik glided soundlessly along becoming one with the shadows once again as easily as if he had never left his dark world. Some things once learned became second nature. Protecting oneself from discovery apparently had been one of those learned skills Erik retained in his repertoire of tricks.

Knowing he had to both careful but quick he moved along as fast as he could while avoiding the men who walked the deck keeping watch. Just because he didn't see them didn't mean they weren't there. Soon he caught movement then heard a low conversation being exchanged.

Going from one barrel to another that held water and various other needed items Erik hid himself as best he could while keeping a close eye on the two men on night watch. If this had been his ship knowing someone was coming for him, Erik felt he would have kept more men on watch. In this weak light it was far to easy to steal aboard without detection.

He wouldn't complain because Dent felt overly confident in his own ability or show any remorse for taking advantage in Dent's underestimating Erik's skills.

Erik waited until the second man had made a pass by the opening to the lower decks. Seeing his chance to get below deck he hurried over to the portal leading down into the semi-darkened lower level of the ship.

He couldn't risk lighting a torch or candle. He'd have to use whatever light they already had below deck. Going down the steep steps Erik came to the galley.

The place had been left with the remains of what looked like many meals on the table and other surfaces. It would seem the cook was not willing to also clean up after the pigs he cooked for.

A lamp hung on the wall beside an open doorway casting a faint light around the large area. Glancing toward the light Erik could see another faint light down the corridor leading to other areas of the ship.

Dent had better not have placed Mary down in the hold. Rats Erik knew were rife on ships especially ones that were not kept even minimally clean.

The captains quarters would be somewhere in the back toward the bow of the ship. Perhaps not at the very end of the corridor, but near enough to be out of the flow of human traffic going back and forth to complete their daily routines. It also meant whoever occupied the cabin would not have to listen to men taking a bit of recreation during late night hours.

It would also afford the captain a bit of privacy as the crew would have cabins closer to the kitchen and the opening to the upper deck. He wouldn't have to worry about being awakened by the men coming and going as they changed watch.

Erik could hear muffled conversation coming from behind different doors. He imagined that several men bunked in each cabin.

If he had been the one taking Mary Erik thought it would be logical to want the woman near his own cabin. Leaning his ear against one door at a time he listened hoping to catch Mary's voice while dreading that eventuality at the same time. It would be much easier to get her out without a commotion if she was alone.

Going from side to side Erik heard only men speaking about many different things that men talk about when with other men. He found no indication Mary had been behind any of those doors. Leaving the doors alone that had voices coming from behind the wooden panels he went down the corridor to where he thought the captain's cabin might be.

Placing his ear against the door all he heard was the sound of snoring. He heard nothing else but needed to be sure this cabin held only Mr. Dent and not Mary as well.

Turning the knob he opened the door slowly praying it did not creak. Having opened it enough to stick his head around the door Erik chanced a quick look inside.

He didn't see any other beds besides the large one against the wall. Creeping inside he went to the bed ready to kill the man if Mary lay in that bed beside him. Lucky for Mr. Dent he had gone to his bed alone. It took all of Erik's considerable willpower to leave the man alive when he left the room.

If the man was only half as conscientious or intelligent as a qualified captain, Erik calculated he had just enough time to find Mary and return her to the other ship before Dent woke to make a few rounds of the ship himself.

As captain it would fall to him to ensure that his men followed his orders as closely as he could. With Dent looking over his shoulder he would likely make those rounds every couple of hours or so.

Erik left the man sleeping peacefully in his bed at least for the time being. The next time he faced the man there would be a different outcome. For now he could not waste time taking the man's life.

One door remained that Erik had not checked. His heart racing he felt this would be where he would find Mary, the keeper of his heart. Laying his hand against the door he could feel her presence as if she were standing right there in front of him not separated by a heavy wooden door.

Turning the knob he found it to be locked. Taking out his little lock pick set from the inner pocket of his jacket Erik went to work on the lock.

He hoped no one other than Mary occupied the room. He'd hate to have to kill a man in front of Mary. She knew he had taken lives before but it would be all too visual when having the life of someone taken right before your eyes.

Grinding his teeth in frustration when the door creaked as he inched it open, Erik continued to slowly push the door inward. When he had it opened far enough he could see that no one occupied the bed across from him.

At first he thought the room deserted. It was only when he heard light breathing coming from behind the door that he knew he must have alerted whoever had been in the bed. Once more he silently cursed the door.

There was nothing for it, he'd have to take on whoever stood behind the door ready to bash his brains in.

Giving himself one last reviving breath he shoved the door back as hard as he could. He heard a loud grunt or moan. Either way what he heard had not been anything coming from a male.

Dreading what he would see Erik peeked around the door just in case he had misheard what he thought he had heard. Peering downward he clearly saw Mary crumpled on the floor where she had fallen after he had bashed her with the door.

Whipping the door closed behind him Erik kneeled down taking Mary across his thighs as he held her upper body tightly in his arms.

"Oh Mary, Mary please forgive me. Please speak to me. Mary my love you must be alright." Erik felt utterly bereft thinking he had done some permanent harm to her.

Within a short time he heard a muffled voice say against his chest, "I am fine other than the knot I am sure is rising on the back of my head."

Leaning away from one another each looked their fill before falling into one another's arms for a fierce kiss. Neither wished to let go but knew they must.

Placing his hands on either side of her face Erik inquired if she would be able to make it over the side of the ship or if she needed him to carry her.

As much as she would love to be held once more by Erik she did not think being thrown over his shoulders like a sack of potatoes would be in the least romantic or enjoyable. On second thought she felt in different circumstances it could lead to interesting things.

There was also the matter of his loss of blood. She'd ask him latter how that gash on his head and on his hands came to be. She did not think it would do him any good to further strain himself by carrying her when she felt perfectly able to do what she needed to do.

Assuring Erik that she would be fine they set about making their getaway. Leading the way Erik took the same route back that he had used to come down below deck.

The only perceivable problem would be making it back across the deck without those two men seeing them. Whispering to Mary he waited for her to nod her head before leaving her in the shadows.

Rather than risk both of them being seen Erik would take out the two men. He had not needed to say he would be leaving both men dead. He couldn't risk them waking before he had Mary safely back on board.

The first man went down with only a little struggling. From the smell of him Erik surmised he had drank more than advisable when placed in a position of trust such as guarding the deck. At least his suffering had been minimal.

The second man put up a little more fight. He even managed to pull his knife from the scabbard at his side to stab Erik in the leg. Erik held back the scream of pain that had risen up into his throat. With a vicious twist of his powerful hands Erik snapped the man's neck.

He did not feel good about this but could assuage any guilt he might feel later by reminding himself they had taken Mary and would have done unspeakable things to her with little thought for her pain.

Leaving a trail of blood behind him Erik returned to Mary silently urging her to the rail. He did not like having her climbing down the same precarious way he had climbed up but there was no other option at the moment.

Aiding her as best as he could Erik made sure she had a firm grip on the rope and her legs tightly wrapped around it before he let her go. If this were a romantic novel he would have carried her on his back to safety.

He had even thought to do that very thing. His common sense had won out. As romantic as it sounded in reality it would have been far too dangerous. Even uninjured it would have been difficult to hold the weight of two people. With his leg bleeding freely now, he felt his strength waning with each drop that flowed onto the leg of his trousers.

Gathering his strength about him, Erik climbed over the side. He would not give in to this weakness until he had Mary safely back aboard the other ship then he returned to deal with that blackguard pirate captain, Nathaniel Dent.

Mary clung to Erik desperately knowing he would be returning to the other ship to face Nathaniel in some sort of battle.

"Erik, I know you must go. All I ask is that you return to me. I love you, I love you Erik. I can't live without you, I won't live without you. You must be safe."

Erik felt choked beyond speaking any words. No words would convey how he felt toward Mary. Love seemed even to pale when used to describe the emotion binding him body and soul to her.

Mary knew of his injury but also knew he would not want her to beg him to stay. He needed to do this. The last time he had loved someone she had been taken from him by another only with a different outcome in mind. She knew Erik still mourned that loss.

This time the woman he cared for had been taken but he had rescued her. Both of them knew Nathaniel Dent would take his revenge at some point in the future if Erik did not end it now.

Kissing Mary with all the passion he felt for her Erik promised he would return to her. He nearly returned to Mary when she called to him declaring her love in a whisper the wind carried to his ear.

They exchanged a meaningful last glance before Erik joined the others in a skiff. He tore a piece of his shirt to tie around his leg so the blood loss would be slowed or if he was lucky stopped altogether.

Mary restrained the urge to throw herself at Erik so she could plead with him not to leave her. They could leave this all behind them. She had to let Erik do what he knew to be the right thing. Nathaniel would not let them simply return home to their lives without making some restitution in blood.

Erik turned away from Mary's beseeching eyes lest he let himself be persuaded to leave without taking the steps to assure their safety once they returned home.

He must make sure Dent could never come after Mary again. He did not want to die now and would do everything in his power to return to her. He had an incentive to live now one he hoped would keep him from committing foolish mistakes.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter Twenty**

**Fight to the Death**

With as little noise as they could possibly make they rowed to the other ship, three little boats bobbing toward danger. Everyone remained silent each having their own private thoughts. Bloodshed would be inevitable. Who would be coming back and who would perish entered everyone's mind.

They were willing to die to serve as men of honor. Dent and his crew served no code other than dishonesty. If every last one of them must die then the price would be steep but worth the cost.

As they drew closer they could hear shouting. They supposed Mary's absence had been noted as well as any men Erik had killed to bring her to safety. Perhaps this confusion could aid in their bid to board the ship without notice.

The element of surprise had been removed. At least they still had the advantage of clear heads as most of Dent's crew would have been celebrating all day and long into the night.

One by one they climbed aboard. The captain went first then Erik. As the fourth man threw his leg over the side and stepped onto the deck, a man up top yelled down to his mates that they had intruders boarding on the port side.

Erik and Captain Rogers turned to stand back to back as the others climbed aboard. Men came rushing forward to engage them with their blades.

Soon the fray had begun in earnest. The clang of steel could be heard all over the ship. Shouts of men warning of attacks could be heard. Blood started flowing from wounds inflicted by the sharp blades of swords as well as knives. Erik dispatched the man he had been battling with a deft thrust of his blade to the man's stomach.

Shoving the body away from him Erik looked around for Dent. In his gut he knew the man would cowardly hide away waiting for a chance to escape. That meant hiding below deck. Erik could not fathom why these men would risk their lives defending a man who would sell them for a piece of silver.

Erik took the ladder down to the galley he had used before. Making his way to the passage leading to the cabins he carefully moved down toward the door that led to Dents cabin.

Movement then a crash from down the end of the passage had Erik's feet running toward the noise. A hatch lay open leading to the deck. Erik cursed himself for not anticipating the man would have a back way out.

Going up the ladder cautiously Erik stuck his head and shoulders out. A whirring sound just beside his ear had his head turning to the side. That quick movement saved his ear from being sliced from his head.

Dent had to wrestle with the embedded sword just to Erik's right. Dent worked the blade loose just in time to point it at Erik. Moving quickly Erik faced Dent now sword to sword.

"What have you done with my woman freak? I haven't finished with her yet. She was real nice the first time. The second will be even better as now the little whore has been broken in."

Erik saw red. He lunged at Dent just as the man anticipated. He struck Erik a glancing blow with the hilt of his sword. Dent took advantage of Erik's staggering to lunge forward. He just missed skewering Erik solidly in his middle.

Knowing he could not lose his head again Erik blocked the man from his mental recognition. His opponent now would only be a nameless, faceless person trying to take something from Erik he held dear.

With a cool head now Erik traded strike for strike with Dent. He knew with certainty Mary had not been violated. She had been far too calm to have been taken violently by this man or any other.

Dent had been trying to bait him and had succeeded admirably. Not again would Erik let his guard down. The man could taunt all he wanted because regardless of what if anything had happened, Erik now had Mary safely away from that grasping bastard's clutches.

Dent continued to try to distract Erik with no success. Erik kept advancing as Dent retreated. The man's strikes were becoming more desperate and less planned or with little effect. Erik on the other hand had given Dent a few deep cuts.

Erik's own wound throbbed with each step but he used mind over matter to conquer the pain. The wound had stopped bleeding after being tied off but this stress along with the rigorous movement had it seeping again. Not as badly but enough blood leaked out to cause weakness after a few minutes.

Both men were now among the others battling for supremacy. Bodies lay on the deck covered in blood. The deck was slick with the red stain that seeped out of wounds.

Erik took a chance when he saw it. He whirled around avoiding Dent's thrust. As he came back around he stepped forward with his sword outstretched.

Dent looked surprised to feel that stab to his abdomen. Looking down in disbelief he then raised his head to look at Erik as he said, "You freakish bastard. You have killed me."

Even knowing his moment of death had come did not bring any remorse to Dent's lips. He died having condemned himself to eternal damnation. Erik could not work up any sympathy for the man.

The remaining crew members seeing their captain felled before their eyes took to their heels toward the lifeboats. When Captain Rogers and his men would have pursued them Erik bade them to leave them to the mercy of the sea.

If they made it to safety then it would be God's will. If not they would then join their captain in hell. Erik wanted to climb over that rail so he could return to Mary but there were men injured who had fought to help free her. They deserved his help in return.

Only a couple of the men had received serious wounds. With the proper care they would recover. Erik's own throbbing leg began to feel as if someone had stuck a lit match into the wound.

He knew this meant a fever had taken hold and possibly infection. Captain Rogers could see Erik's face distorted in pain. Looking down he saw the blood stained trouser leg.

This time they could use the netting tossed over the side to climb down into the boats. Captain Rogers ordered two men to help Erik over the side. Not having to climb down the rope hand over hand made the trip easier. The pain had not been lessened but the time climbing down had been halved.

Nearly collapsing down into the seat of the small boat, Erik groaned as pain shot up his leg. He stretched it out in front of him to relieve the pressure. He doubted he had another climb left in him.

It would not please him to have the others helping him again but saw no other way to board the ship. There were others in his same position. They would not feel any less a man to need assistance. For Erik though it still felt odd to have the aid of another on a face to face basis. Formerly any help he received he had paid someone handsomely or threatened someone such as Madame Giry all those years.

Mary stood waiting for him to place both feet on the deck before she carefully wound her arm around his waist. She began to fire orders at the bewildered men. She sounded as if she ordered men around every day of her life.

Refusing all help Mary told them to attend to their own men she would take care of Erik. He merely shrugged when they looked at him questioningly. He really didn't want anyone but Mary to tend to him anyway. He need not feel embarrassed as she had seen him enough times that one more wouldn't matter.

He watched as she went about gathering what she would need to tend to his wound. She poured a bowl of fresh water adding some sort of powder. He guessed it would be some sort of cleaning agent, something to ward off infection or clean it away if it had set in already.

Carelessly she destroyed a white cotton sheet. She tore it into strips. Some she set aside to be rolled later so she could make them ready for when she would need to change his bandages.

Erik could hear shouting going on above. The captain issued orders for some of his men to return to the pirate ship. The bodies would need to be dealt with as well as the ship manned to be returned to port in England.

Intense pain nearly took him out of the world of consciousness. The pain in his leg he could endure so long as he knew Mary would not be leaving his side once more.

Having her tend to him almost felt like a natural thing now. He dearly hoped this would be the last time she had need to nurse him back to health.

Now that the only obstacle between them would be facing Christine and her husband, the Vicomte, Erik felt it time he and Mary made formal declarations of their feelings. They had hinted at things but had not declared their deepest emotions to the other in a romantic situation. Desparately declarations were all well and good but to have them spoken of with clear heads and warm hearts is how Erik wanted his relationship to Mary to start and end. He for one did not want to risk another day going by without letting her know exactly how deeply he cared for her.

Never would he have believed anyone could replace Christine in his heart but Mary had with little effort. In all the ways he held the world in contempt Mary had nothing but optimism for humanity's future. She could forgive those who committed atrocities against her while he could not.

With her help and love he felt even he could come to think not everyone would wish him some harm, even now all her concern centered on him. Many women would have been so traumatized by what Mary had endured they would have taken to their beds not rallying for a number of weeks, perhaps never.

Erik watched every move she made not wanting to miss one moment being with her. He fought off the wave of exhaustion urging his body to give in to sleep. He feared sleeping lest he awake and Mary had gone. Only just having her returned to him, he did not feel confident that something may yet part them again, this time forever.

Once Mary had tended his wounds she made him as comfortable as an injured man could be. Sitting in the chair next to him she considered how to approach her next subject without causing him undue distress.

"Erik, I know we have only just come out of a very trying occurrence and I do not wish to place any further strain on our relationship but even you must know I must return to the convent. I don't feel even now an urge to serve our God but I do feel it necessary to go back so I might have the chance to settle things in person. While I feel certain I no longer wish to join the church we must make certain. Going back will give me a sense of who I really am and what will be best for me. In my heart I know it is you I want. If I can go back then return to you without reservations then we will both know what I feel is more than mere gratitude. I know and I hope you do know, that I love you."

Leaning forward she took his face between her hands with such love his breath caught in his throat. When she spoke it was in a tender soft voice, "Nothing will change that whatever I decide to do. I would hate to have us moving forward committing ourselves to one another then later have some regrets. I don't feel as if I will feel any differently if I go back but I want to prove categorically I love you more than I love serving God and man as a Sister of Charity."

Having come to the end of her speech Mary waited for Erik to speak. He did not look angry or even uncertain. What reflected out of his eyes pulled at her without a word or touch from his loving hands. He owned her body and soul. In that moment she knew that as surely as she knew she loved him beyond her own life.

Such love as she saw shining back at her from Erik she thought to be a rare thing indeed. For Erik it would be the equivalent of handing over his very soul into her hands. Taking great care not to hurt him further Mary lay down beside him. Kissing him tenderly over his face she felt the salty tears on her own lips. Flicking her tongue out she kissed away his tears.

Gingerly Erik turned toward Mary on the narrow bed. He draped his arm across her waist to pull her nearer to him.

"I know what you say is true. If there had ever been a way for me to find out about my own childhood before…well before it had gone to hell, I would have moved heaven and earth seeking out any information. Our past, whatever it may be, is the key to our futures. Understanding our past gives us insights into our character and who we have become. I understand you must go. I will not let you out of my sight again so I will be coming with you unless you think I would be using undue influence on you."

Placing her hands on either side of his face again Mary kissed his lips tenderly. Smiling confidently she looked directly into his eyes as she said, "I would be honored to have you at my side. I want you there when I face the whole of my past. I think I remember much of it but some places are a little hazy still. Nothing that is still not clear to me feels in any way threatening. I feel it is things concerning my commitment to the church, or lack thereof that is still not coming clearly to me. We will face this together. With you beside me Erik I think I could face anything. Nothing is insurmountable."

Erik felt for the first time in his life confident of another person's genuine affection for him. Come what may, if this was to be all he had he would be eternally grateful for having had this chance to know Mary. He could not think of her as Rachelle, even if that name sounded perfectly lovely.

He had learned to trust and love her as Mary and Mary she would always be to him. Come what may he knew he would be forever grateful for having had the chance to experience Mary and her wonderful love for life. Through her eyes he had seen the world as a much better place than what he had known it to be personally.

Together they would face this next hurdle fate had placed in their path. Whether purposely or accidentally, Erik forgot about Christine and Raoul waiting with the others back at his home ready to have his past placed openly before Mary to see.

Fate it would seem had more plans to test Erik and Mary.

**A/N: Coming close to the end. I want to invite everyone to read my story for the Janet Evanovich/Stephanie Plum books. My story is Ranger's Angel. You can access it from my bio page or through the site's search. As always reviews are very much appreciated and many thanks to all who have been reading this and reviewing. It makes me happy to read what you think. If you're happy then I'm happy.**


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter Twenty-one**

**Past and Present**

The few days it took to return home Erik and Mary spent every moment they could together. For the most part they ignored the rest of the world and anything concerning the immediate future. It would come whether or not they worried over what might or might not happen. They preferred to enjoy this time together.

For the first time in his life Erik had been completely honest with another person. Mary appreciated his honesty and understood why he had done many of the things he had done to survive. She may not agree with how he handled things but not everyone dealt with life's hardships in the same way. She would not throw it in his face that in some aspects her own life had been harder than his own had been. At least he had a roof over his head without anyone dictating when he ate, how much he ate, when to worship and how to worship. When to speak and what those words should be. They both had suffered under the lash. He at the cruel hands of gypsies and she, at the hands of vicious representatives of church and God. Even now as her memory returns Mary can feel and hear the loud crack of the lash as it stings across her bared flesh. That explains the thin white lines across her back, legs and buttocks. Of all her memories, Mary wished those could have stayed lost forever.

Erik's method of coping with adversity in his life had been to strike out first. Very little tenderness had been shown to him so how could he be expected to know how to display that emotion? Erik had faults, and they were many, but he did wish to change and had made a very nice beginning to that end. All the loyal people he employed were proof he had become someone worth respect.

Amnesia had been her way to cope with adversity. Her mind had simply blocked out the unpleasantness until she had been ready to deal with it all. If Erik had not been by her side during this time she felt perhaps she would have preferred living without the knowledge of her past life. Nothing before Erik came into her life held any meaning for her. The day of her birth she considered the day Erik found her where an angry ocean had tossed her helpless battered body onto his beach. Even when his anger had gotten the best of him when he calmed he had been remorseful and tried to make amends. Erik would always be in the process of learning. His development as a contributing human being had been arrested by the cruelty the world had shown him. Together they would take on the world.

Mary had cried buckets when Erik had proposed to her. He had blindfolded her then led her below deck. When he had removed the kerchief from around her eyes to her delight he had lit candles all around the room. Instead of having flowers in vases he had managed to find colorful cloth in the hold below deck. Arranging those bits of cloth to resemble bouquets of flowers had taxed his creative mind she felt sure. His beaming face had told the story of how proud he had been of his offering. She had shown him just how appreciative she had been in the only manner she knew. Kissing him senseless and leaving herself quite unable to breath had been the best she could do. Erik had seemed quite pleased by her show of gratitude and affection.

As he had nervously taken her hand and pulled her inside the room music had begun to drift from the deck above. Erik had conveniently left the portal open so they were serenaded by a few of the crew as masculine voices joined the sound of a squeezebox.

Several times Erik had cleared his throat as he paced about. Knowing something monumental had been about to occur she had taken his hand to still his movement. Staring down at her intently for a few moments he had dropped to his knees declaring his everlasting love for her as he implored her to relieve his torment and become his wife. Without hesitation she had fallen down on top of him knocking him to the floor. As she had rained kisses over his face and neck she had shouted gleefully that _"Yes! I will be your bride." _

Things had gotten a little out of hand about then. They had not taken the final step of sexual union but they might as well have. Only Erik's insistence she remain pure until the wedding night had kept them from taking that final irrevocable step. Feeling proud of his restraint Mary had not tried to coerce him to go against his ideas about what a wedding night should be. He wasn't above finding pleasure in other ways and she had to say she herself found them quite enlightening. In their minds they were all but married. They only needed the papers for the sake of legality.

They contented themselves with learning more about one another although in truth they knew as much as they needed to know. By look and touch alone they communicated more than others did with words.

Nearing England's shore Mary grew restless. One last thing had to be done before completely turning body and soul over to Erik. She must return to the convent. There were questions that must be answered before her life joined with Erik's. Nothing learned could or would change the outcome. Unfinished business, closing the on the last chapter of a book, that is how best to describe Mary's decision to part for a short time with Erik while she dealt with the remainder of her old life and he dealt with his.

Trusting Erik with her very life did not mean there would not be a few spare moments of jealousy to imagine him speaking to a young woman he admittedly loved to the point of obsession. Emotions like that don't just die. They may fade or change but are forever a part of both parties. Mary understood that. She may not like it but she did understand it. Besides, she held Erik's love within her heart. When they were reunited they would be as one. She, not Christine Daàe would be Erik's future, his forever love.

Erik's uncertain temper roared unrestrained when Mary quietly but firmly told him she wanted to be left dockside in London then he would continue the journey home on his own. At first not understanding his dark despair she grew cross with his mood. Then as if he spoke into her mind of his pain and belief that she wanted to leave him and not return, ever, then and only then did she let go of her displeasure of his outburst.

Going down on her knees at his feet Mary wrapped her arms around his legs holding him still. "No Erik no. You misunderstand me. I'm sorry I didn't make this clearer to you. I only wish to settle my old life. I'll return to you as soon as I can. This will give you time to settle your own past."

"You…you will come back?" He drops down to sit on the floor with her across his lap. The uncertainty and doubt breaks her heart. For all they have professed still Erik doubts he is worthy of her affection, of anyone's affection.

"I will always come back to you. No matter how far we travel I will always find my way home to you. Erik, you are my home. Without you there is nothing. You are all I want or need. You silly man, are my home." How could he doubt her sincerity with boundless love shining out of eyes awash in unshed tears?

"Shall I confess something to you?" Mary asks as she plays with the button on his shirtfront.

"You? You have something to confess? Why Miss Mary, what wickedness could you have to confess?" He grins as a blush blooms across her cheeks. Downcast eyes hide thoughts he must see. Lifting up her chin with two fingers his breath catches in his chest. There is no mistaking what he sees for it is what shines back in the mirror now when he thinks of Mary first thing every morning as he shaves or any time of day or night for that matter. Love. Pure unfettered love. Nothing forced or bought but given freely.

"You love me." Not a question but a statement.

"Of course I love you but that is not my confession. What I must confess is…well she…I…loved her so long…I am no one famous or talented. How will I measure up beside her? There, I've confessed how awful I am. I am jealous. Jealous of a woman I have not met, one now married and not long ago bore her husband a child. It is not seemly or Christian but where you are concerned my good sense goes into hiding." How glorious she looks is all that Erik can think as her head rests on his chest.

After a few minutes basking in her confession Erik slowly replays words from a few moments ago. Mary, his beautiful Mermaid, felt jealous of Christine? He could not fathom it. Since he knew lies were not something his beloved would let pass her lips, then Mary spoke the truth. Hard enough to imagine anyone loving him, harder still to believe she thought him in danger from another woman. Did she not know all other's dimmed when in her presence?

This then was something he could do. He could show Mary that no other woman held even a glimmer of a chance to draw his eyes from her. Once Erik set his mind to do something he did it thoroughly. Breathless, with hair mussed and lips swollen from impassioned kisses, Mary could barely recall what had given her a moment of unease merely moments ago. Erik and his passion were drugs worth taking on a daily basis.

A secret smile crossed lips still throbbing from being shown how much they are desired beneath his lips. Christine was no threat. Mary felt charitable, for had not the silly girl let Erik slip through her fingers? Mary clenched her fist. He would not be slipping from her fingers or going out of her life. Not for many long years if God so willed it. And somehow, Mary felt God did plan for them to share a long and happy life blessed with many children. Another secret smile crossed lips ready to explore passion once more.

**A/N: Sorry, short I know but I'll try to put up the next chapter soon to make up for it if the world cooperates, H4G's world anyway. Thanks to all who read and review. I love taking these journeys with my readers. **


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N: And so we come to the end. This cha****pter will be from Mary and Erik's POV. I wanted them to tell you in their own words what time away from each other has meant for them. **

**Mary has her ghosts to put to rest as does Erik. Not for a moment do they doubt they will be reunited. This time Erik has faith in himself and the woman he loves. **

**Chapter Twenty-two**

**Laying Ghosts to Rest**

**Mary's POV**

Two months. Two very long months I have been away from my beloved. A lifetime can be lived in that time. I carry my talisman with me at all times. Erik gave it to me before we parted.

How shy he was to give me what to him seemed a meager offering. Too me it represents all that we are to one another. How gifted and clever he is. It amazes me that his long fingered hands could form something so delicate from what had once been only an attractive piece of stone.

The mermaid is exquisite which I am sure is not what I am although Erik silenced me when I would have said otherwise. In order to do this we berthed somewhere along the English coastline. He rowed ashore so he could find a perfect stone, one he could see our spirits in. Romantic to the end.

Erik insisted we delay our return for a week. He begged one week to create something for me to take away with me. I told him I had his love and that is all I needed. How could I deny him something that meant so much to him? The crew and captain were agreeable to accede to Erik's demand as he had been a tower of strength as well as having proven his honor. I suppose it did not damage his cause that every man on board had Erik's written guarantee they would receive a small bag of gold for their trouble.

Shutting himself away my love worked feverishly only stopping to take meals with us or a walk around deck with at night. I didn't worry about him being shut off for such long hours as there is no longer that crazed look in Erik's eyes. It took him six days to finish the piece.

Secrets among the men and Erik alerted me to some plot. I wasn't frightened, no, I felt exhilarated as our love grew stronger every second we breathed.

After a very romantic dinner on deck Erik knelt down on one knee. He presented me with the most marvelous work of art in the world, at least to me that is what my treasure is.

How delicate the mermaid is. Long hair, serene features with a slight smile. If stone could have life then this piece lived. I am certain the mermaid's eyes glow at times. The man holding the mermaid to his chest is my Erik. Not a man of perfection but one with his exact facial flaw. For me, to prove his trust, he did not carve a mask to hide anything from me. Erik bared not only his face but his soul.

As he knelt before me, notes passed his lips that soothed, seduced and promised me the world. He implored me to share that world with him. I held this delicate token of his love in the palm of my hand and I felt us being surrounded by a warm cocoon, separating us from the outside world. Dropping to me knees I could only express how moved I was by kissing that poor wretched lovely face.

Now, whenever I am missing Erik all I have to do is caress the mermaid and her human love. Those strong arms held her to him within the shelter of his arms just as Erik the human man did me, his mermaid from the sea.

Having made peace with my past I am free now from all that kept me shackled in my old life before the sea carried me to my destiny.

As I suspected nothing about the church itself moved me to take any vows that would forever bind me to an entity that only brought me pain. Only private moments in prayer did I feel at peace within the confines of the church and the order that took me in when my mother abandoned me.

I am not certain all they told me is accurate. A few of the kinder nuns said more with their eyes than with their silent tongues.

Born to a whore, fathered by a drunkard thief and murderer, as soon as the church came into my mother's wandering path she took refuse for a short time hoping to find me a place of safety. I am grateful that she felt that small spot of warmth toward me, a burden she did not want nor love.

Only by confessing her sins did she gain the churches promise to provide for me and when the time came marry me into the service of our God.

Life within holy walls is not easy especially for one born from sin as I was. One priest in particular took sadistic pleasure in punishing me for the slightest infraction of the church's teaching. I have remembered his name and now I shall erase it from my memory again. I do not wish to punish him for he will have to knell before God and answer for his own sins, which are many, more than mine ever were.

Though I can strike his memory from my mind I cannot rid my body of the marks the lash made upon my back, buttocks and legs. He punished me for a body that he claimed tempted him as Eve did Adam. God gave me the body and as every young girl does they grow into womanhood. Each year that passed from the time I turned thirteen until I was sent to tend the lepers, I received a beating daily.

Women in the church had no say. They could not go against a man of the cloth. Their solution had been to send me to a land so far and riddled with disease only those confident in the Lord' mercy dared step foot on the island.

How can I hold a grudge for actions that eventually led me to Erik? For the chance to be with him I would suffer the fires of hell for a lifetime spent sharing our love.

Oh Erik my love, I am coming home. We shall not be parted again. Kissing my talisman I send a prayer of gratitude to God and a message of love to Erik.

Erik's POV

For two months I have returned nightly to the cliff where I first saw my sweet Mary. Rachel is her given name but she prefers to keep the name of the woman who feel in love with a tortured ghost. She set him free. To me it matters not what name she bares, it could be Mermaid for all I care as long as she will share my last name with me. It isn't a family name but it has served me well these past few years.

These days I allow myself only brief moments to think of Christine. Those last days with her were surreal. My lovely protégé had grown into a lovely woman, wife and caring mother. Madame tells me it has much to do with me how well mu Angel of Music turned out. I beg to differ but even Meg and Raoul have alluded to the same explanation as to how an orphan could turn out to be so generous of nature and kind of heart.

No one in his memory ever ascribed such words to him. Madame did try to treat both her own daughter Meg and Christine equally. At times that was not possible. Madame being a single mother herself had to put her daughter's wellbeing first. That is how I came to seek out the child Christine had been.

Christine being of a more genteel nature took life's bumps in the road harder than others. Meg had lost her father but did not cry herself to sleep every night. She did not believe he would come back to her or send her an angel. What poor Christine got was me, a ghost and phantom. A man yes but one who lived in shadow. If I brought Christine our from her darkness she surely kept me from mine for many years. I could have committed far worse crimes than I did. Her innocent belief in me did act as a panacea. Being an composer with no outlet for my music nearly drove me insane.

By teaching Christine to sing I gave my music a voice. I only looked upon her in a different light when her perfection as a young woman caught my lonely lecherous gaze. God's grace sent me here. I don't deserve it but I shall try every day for the rest of my life to be worthy of Mary's love and the affection of everyone else in my home.

Since I have my own beloved I can now find something charming in Raoul. We shall never be great friends but we shall not ever be enemies again. I want to see Christine again as well as my namesake. I did scold Christine for naming her firstborn after me. She blushed prettily winning Raoul's forgiveness and once again found a place in my heart.

Our conversation was not easy but it was cathartic. I did not gloss over my misdeeds nor the harm I believe I did to Christine's fragile mind. My former protégé will not be a strong willed person but she will have a quiet strength in her innocence. No matter what age we meet, Christine I believe will always project the same guileless persona she does now. If not for Mary I would declare Raoul the luckiest man in the world. I have my Mary and to the world I say I am the luckiest man by far.

I had thought our conversation would be long and arduous but it was neither. We've reconciled our pasts and forgiven wrongs. After that we celebrated the joy our lives have become. We loved, we lost, then found the other halves of our souls.

If shouting to the rooftops how sorry I am for all the bad things I've done in my lifetime I would do so gladly but I can't. What is done cannot be undone. A very wise woman keeps telling me to let my past rest in peace. For a former dance instructor Madame is a very smart woman.

As per my instructions a rider came to inform me when Raoul's boat returned to port. The house began to buzz with energy as every set about turning the chapel into the perfect place for Mary and I to become man and wife. I have no fear that Mary will call me presumptuous. I rather believe she will call her future husband brilliant.

The women giggle and gossip as they cook, clean and prepare for a wedding feast. My nerves are not from fear of rejection or that Mary changed her mind. What I fear is after the wedding. Although we have not fully taken steps only married people should, we have done enough for me to know there is so much more we will share. It is that part that jangles my nerves. I have no experience in such intimate things. I'll shoot myself before I ask Raoul for advice. I'll not let him think I am less of a man than he.

In the end I gave myself over to trust in my ability to sense what Mary wants and needs. Without being too vulgar I have learned of ways to prolong intimacies so both partners find their release. Little did I know Mary and I have been practicing those lessons all along. We are well matched.

We are all standing waiting for Mary's coach to arrive. I reserved one at the livery in town with a driver. The townspeople would hear of a ship docking before we did.

The women have not allowed me to see Mary's wedding gown. I did not know that the mere mention of weddings and babies can bring a woman to tears without warning. They are happy tears so the men of the household do not mind.

The church bells ringing alert us she has arrived. I've been sequestered in the chapel as Madame insists we observe the tradition of the groom not seeing the bride and her gown before the wedding. If this gives me an edge then I gladly will comply.

Standing in front of the village priest I wait for my bride to be walked down the aisle by Raoul. Jacob stands by me as my best man.

At any moment I expect to wake only to find the last years of my life have been part nightmare part dream. It is the dream I fear losing. I don't deserve her but if God entrusted her to me then I shall take care to treat her with the gentlest parts of me and keep my darker side locked away.

My heart is racing now. The organ is playing, the doors open and in steps my mermaid. She brings with her light, laughter and love. Nothing is hidden from me. My love is open, giving herself to me completely as I give her everything I am and will be.

From this day forward we will be joined in every possible way. I cannot help it, I cry. Not tears of sorrow but of such joy it cannot be borne in silence.

Sniffling coming from all around is proof I am not the only one affected by this moment. Mary is not crying but her smile is enough to warm all the remaining cold places of my heart. With her, there will only be light, my beacon to bring me into the light.

Joining our hands, our eyes see only on another. It is as if we are the only two people in the world. I am blessed. Something melts away inside me. I think it is all the anger, self-loathing and hate I have held against the world and toward myself. Mary's love sheds light on that darkness. I feel reborn.

Years later, looking back I thank God for bringing Mary to me. Children of my own did not seem possible when I lived the life of a ghost and phantom. Only when Mary came along and made me see I am a man, a man worth being loved, did I let go of my past. Those dark days are fading memories.

Our children, Thomas Erik, Antoinette Christine, the twins Jacob Raoul and Mary Margaret are our legacy. I am not being prejudiced when I claim my children are by far the most intelligent, talented and generously natured people I know.

If left to me, I would have pushed them too hard to perfect their talents. I used my power over Christine in the days when I was selfish and hated the world and myself most of all. Mary's guidance by her deceptively softer will keeps us all in line. We want to please her. Her approval is worth more than gold.

Children can be willful, ungrateful, needy little creatures. By those standards I am still a child. My mermaid uses a gentle but firm guiding hand on all of us. Each and every child has been given the freedom to grow and learn through trial and error. I always want to step in heavy handed using my fatherly authority to force them to do what I know is right. Mary keeps me from alienating our children. Of course if they are in real danger Mary has allowed me to step in.

Thomas Erik at twenty-two wrote and had published his first opera. He is a talented composer. We all went to opening night to give our support. A standing ovation with calls for the composer nearly burst my chest with pride.

Antoinette Christine, twenty, named for my savior and my first protégé, is a sweet girl with a sweeter voice. We miss her when performances take her all over the world. A few come at times when Mary and I can travel and attend the openings of her shows. With four talented children in the public eye it is hard to attend every opening.

Our twins, goodness, what to say about them? Jacob Raoul, eighteen is somewhat of a scoundrel. His good looks and talent have every young debutante vying for his attention. His adopted uncle Raoul de Chagny is indulgent of the boy's flirtatious ways, until he turned them on Adele, Raoul's only daughter just now turned seventeen.

Jacob has found his niche in acting and singing. If the heavy sighs and adoring glances are anything to go by our son is destined to be quite a ladies' man. Mary does caution and scold him when he dashes a young girl's hopes and dreams. Some of his pursuers are not so young. I have a suspicion my son takes advantage of the older women using them for monetary gain as well sexual exploits. As long as he doesn't do this with malicious intent we only scold him for being a lothario. Some day he will find the woman he is willing to abandon his wicked ways to win her heart. Young Adele seems to be that woman much to Raoul's dismay.

Lastly there is Mary Margaret. Of all our children Mary is most like her mother in demeanor. Did I foresee this when I suggested one child should carry my wife's name? From me she inherited a mind never satisfied with idleness. Knowledge is a lure we cannot resist as well as the urge to create.

Mary has musical talents as well as talents that surpass anything I could have imagined. Her mind is such that there is nothing she cannot conquer or imagine.

In a man this would be welcomed but in a society where women are thought to be only mothers to serve her husband and children there is little room for an independent intelligent and opinionated woman.

Luckily there is a man in her life willing to support her financially with the only expectation is that she love him. Mary and I gladly give our daughter money to fund a company that buys and sells stocks. It is amazing what she can do with a dollar. Buy low sell high. I have enough money to keep me in luxury for the rest of my life but I'm willing to add to the pot.

Someday I hope to have grandchildren. The way things look it may be sooner than later. Christine and Mary both think they are too young to be called Grand'Mere or anything similar. I am ready for the sound of childish giggles and holding them close for hugs and kisses. There is nothing so life affirming as unconditional love of a child especially one that is of your blood.

I am still a man hiding behind a mask. My family including Antoinette, Meg, Christine, Raoul and staff are the only people I trust to see what I find shameful as well as ugly.

After our first child Thomas looked at me in shock after seeing my unadorned face I learned to prepare each child for my revelation. Looking back Thomas did recover after just a few seconds. It hadn't helped that I'd just read him a tale filled with monsters and the like. Perhaps not the proper time to show a young impressionable child such horror.

After that I drew pictures of how I look in realty so they could get used to what was beneath the mask. Now they are accustomed to seeing me with and without the mask. As for society, they can take me as I am or go to…well Mary deplores hearing such language so I try not to even think in those terms.

We have a few select close friends who do not care to know why I wear a mask. There are those who have been to Paris and no doubt heard the rumors of the insane man wearing a mask who burned L'Opéra Populaire. I suppose the romance of how Mary and I came to know one another swayed the women to my side. It helps that Christine and Raoul visit whenever they can manage to make the trip.

Meg has opened a dance studio. Antoinette helps teach as well as keep the books. Only Antoinette and I know how Meg was able to persuade the bank to loan her the money to buy the building where they live and work. The studio takes up the whole lower floor.

There is a man in Meg's life now. I feared she would end up an old maid. Mary said Meg waited for a special man. She smiled mysteriously. When I finally met Joshua I knew what Mary's secret smile had been about.

Meg's suitor looked very much like me except his face is perfect. His demeanor and nature is nothing like mine, at least not like I used to be. He worked from the time he was twelve years old to help support his family. When his siblings were old enough to go out into the world Joshua then worked to amass a huge fortune.

He owned stock in a railroad and an oil company that produces kerosene located in America. By diversifying his holdings there is less change of total bankruptcy. He and Mary make quite a pair in the financial world. Everyone thought they would find romance together but Joshua took one look at Meg and lost his heart to her and she to him.

I do think Mary Margaret deliberately brought those two together. It seems she is a bit of a romantic at heart. She has her eye on a young entrepreneur named Jason Stockton. Within a year or so I predict he will have earned his first million. Wisely Mary is encouraging him without letting things get too serious too quickly. Wise, but not always possible where the heart is concerned.

Mary and I did catch them in a compromising clinch beneath the mistletoe at Christmas. We surmise there will be another wedding soon or I may have need of a shotgun. Gentle reminders of how we expressed our love before marriage is not something I am willing to consider. This is my daughter.

All in all I am a lucky man. We are all blessed. I wanted to live as normal people do and I have that and more. I am loved, respected and admired by my colleagues at The Voice of Angels Conservatory, my school for talented individuals but no way to perfect their craft due to a lack of funds.

When they are ready it is my responsibility to place them so their talents can be seen by those with influence within the theatrical and musical world. I only take ten of the brightest stars who audition every year seeking a place at the conservatory. Those with dedication succeed, those with talent but lack drive are left behind. I do send them away with a hefty check as well as advice that if they truly want to rise above mediocrity they must commit one hundred percent to that goal.

I give them the opportunity to learn and improve; it is up to the individual how far they go.

Not bad for a ghost and phantom is that not so? I am complete.

**Mary's POV**

What a magical day my wedding was. What other man would do what Erik did for me. Everything was perfect.

The moment we touched hand to hand we became on entity, one heart, one soul. Lord above how we all cried. Not tears of sadness but of joy. My dear Erik cried the most. I think his tears washed away some of the guilt he carried for his sins. Tears do cleanse our souls.

He is not perfect but then who is? I love him as he is,all gruff and growl with a tender heart underneath his dark scowl. His scowl is more habit than a show of anger. Through the years his attractive smile appears more than the scowl of old. He has much to smile about as do I.

Erik conquered his fear of producing children. We have four we are proud to call our own legacy to the world. I am so glad they inherited bits and pieces of Erik and not so much from me. Erik swears they are much like me in temperment and I suppose that is true. There unearthly talents do not come from me. Secretly I know Erik is a proud papa, more than he lets outsiders see. After all, it is not polite to gloat.

When Erik held our first born, Thomas, I felt how profound the moment was for him. Even as we awaited his arrival Erik did not think anything coming form him would be so perfect as Thomas had been. The perfection of Thomas struck Erik into a silent trance for a few minutes. All he could is look and absorb the reality that he had a son, a perfect child.

Restraing Erik's tendency to overindulge his children was not easy when Erik himself still had a tendency to behave childishly around his children. As they came into young adulthood Erik had to move from companion to fatherly guidance and discipline. I know Erik thought he might harm his children if he had to be firm.

Through trial and error we both learned limits for us and for our children. Both of us had to learn how to deal with our children. We weren't born with knowledge that gave us insight into their minds. We must have done every right as our children are four individuals to be proud of.

I have to include Erik when it comes to pride in accomplishments. I think I loved Erik from the moment I met him and through our years together I have come to adore him.

Both Erik and I agree, we are blessed.

**A/N: On a side note I'd like to invite everyone to read my stories on the Janet Evanovich site for the Stephanie Plum books called Ranger's Angel and I also am posting a story on the E.L. James book site for Fifty Shades of Grey called Twenty-five Shades of Darkness. This one is not for the young or anyone offended by BDSM in written word. I'm not perspmally into any of that. I'm working on finally updating and finishing my Story Innocent Lost posted on Fiction Press. I go by Hor4Gerry there too. Anyway, thanks for ready and hope to hear from all who appreciate my story. See you on the other sites, I hope.**


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